


Use Me Hyung

by chvnxiaojie



Series: Buns&Bacon [1]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Medical, Alternate Universe - Sports, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-24
Updated: 2019-11-19
Packaged: 2020-09-25 10:28:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 44,386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20375269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chvnxiaojie/pseuds/chvnxiaojie
Summary: He was caught red-handed pleasing himself in the hospital by Baekhyun. And when Minseok tried to cover himself up, the younger stopped him and whispered, “Use me, hyung.”





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Finally posting this work from my aff acct ;u; hoping to finally finish this story soon as well. Please look forward to it!
> 
> Ja!!! //w\\\\\\\\)

Kim Minseok’s the ace of K-University Sports Clinic. He’s one of the best sports therapists in the whole of South Korea. He’s well-known and acknowledged by a number of doctors, nurses, coaches, and athletes alike. Minseok’s a popular doctor to be quite honest despite his cold personality. And he’s extremely popular in the hook-up department as well.

Let’s just say he’s open to anyone, everyone, unless you’re his current patient or his colleague of course. Minseok still practices professionalism even in his private matters.

And then we have Byun Baekhyun, also an ace in K-University Sports Clinic and a junior of Minseok ever since high school. He’s bubbly, funny, charming, and well-loved. His popularity's extremely high. You just couldn’t help but fall in love with him to be honest.

No one knows anything about him though. His family, his personal life, or even his preference - no one exactly knew a thing about him. That’s why Minseok was surprised, well more of shocked to his very core, for those words to have come out of his hoobae’s mouth.

Frankly, he was apprehensive yet at the same he was extremely aroused.

Minseok knew he was going to regret going against his policy but there was just something inside his head, pushing him and egging him on, to let Baekhyun fuck him senseless. So he did.


	2. Use Me

Sweat trickled down from his forehead to his nose and dropped onto the writhing female beneath him. Minseok’s face was one of bliss, euphoria surging throughout his veins as he continued to thrust deeply into her. A breathy moan escaped her lips, his name effortlessly rolling off from the tips of her tongue. Her nails slowly dragged down his back as if marking him as hers. She grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him close. With a flick of her tongue, she licked and sucked the skin at the base of his neck. She continued until the skin was a bright purple and blue.

“Minseok~” she couldn’t help but moan out loud because the former had finally hit her sweet spot. He grabbed both of her thighs and spread them even wider. He angled himself for better access as he continued to thrust into her, his thrusts becoming more and more violent and dominant but he didn’t care. Minseok could feel the familiar and heavenly feeling of his climax slowly coming to a close. He grabbed for one of her breasts and tweaked her nipples with his fingers. His mouth also abused her other breast with his endless teasing and biting. The female couldn’t do anything but helplessly moan out his name and mewl beneath him.

With one more powerful thrust, Minseok reached his orgasm so he quickly pulled out from her inside and released his load onto the bed. His face was filled with pleasure as his member twitched in his hand.

Minseok grabbed the bedsheet and wiped his hands clean. He then looked down at the female under him. He smiled softly at her, brushed her bangs away from her eyes, and kissed her forehead. “You were terrific,” he told her with his signature lopsided grin. She pouted her lips and looked at him a little disappointed. “It’s not fun if you’re the only one coming you know,” she annoyingly huffed. He chuckled and kissed her temple. “I’ll go down on you then,” he smoothly replied.

The female’s eyes twinkled with delight. She nodded her head and spread her legs once again. “Blow me away,” she told him, her voice challenging. Minseok, getting what she meant, confidently smirked at her. _‘Oh, that’s what I had in mind,’_ he mused to himself.

He thoughtfully looked at the stranger lying down on his bed. She was honestly some random girl he had met at his favorite bar earlier tonight. They shared a few drinks and even flirted with each other. He knew just by the look on her eyes what she wanted from him because his mirrored the exact same thing. _Lust…_ lust was simply our reason. Without words, the two understood each other and knew what they needed to do. As soon as they arrived in his empty apartment, clothes were quickly discarded and skin was immediately met with skin. Lust and desire instantly filled the air.

It’s not that Minseok was a perverted person. He was a man in his prime – a successful sports therapist in one of Korea’s elite hospitals and has a totally healthy body. Lusting for someone was merely normal behavior for anyone in his age; he was still human after all.

As he stared deeply into the female’s eyes, her name sadly lost in his hazy mind, he couldn’t help but see how broken and empty she was. There was a certain void and lifelessness in her lovely dark brown orbs. _‘Birds of the same feather flock together then,’_ he grimly thought. He slowly licked his bottom lip and then gradually went down. He inhaled her scent and it filled his senses, making him slightly hard. He licked his lips again and then kissed her languidly.

_‘This is the only way for us after all. It’s our only way not to feel lonely.’_

**

Minseok annoyingly clicked his tongue as he tried not to glare so hard on the fidgeting figure in front of him. He played with the pen in his hand and pursed his lips as he thought deeply and carefully about the current situation they were in. He looked at the person again and released a heavy sigh. Minseok felt slightly guilty for getting mad at him but it was just freaking exhausting for this thing to happen again.

“Where is that rascal?” he exasperatedly asked Zitao. The young nurse was in charge of a certain VIP athlete admitted in their hospital – Park Chanyeol, a big name in the basketball world. The promising center regrettably had an accident during one of their practice games and injured his Achilles tendon. He’s still under observation since his injury was a critical one and it only happened recently but it seemed like the talented athlete was too stubborn to just quietly sit down and rest for a while.

This was the third time he had ran off, figuratively of course since he’s injured his foot after all, and disappeared to God knows where. He even left his crutches back in his hospital room! For short, he was a pain in the ass for the whole hospital staff – especially Minseok’s. It was just his luck he was tasked to be Park Chanyeol’s doctor to be quite honest.

Zitao remorsefully shook his head and bit his lower lip. “I don’t know where he is, doctor. I went to the court where we found him before but he’s not there,” he dejectedly answered. Minseok released another sigh and tried to calm his boiling temper. “I’ll go look for him in the West wing. Just prepare his room before I get back with him,” he tersely told the nurse.

Without hearing a reply, Minseok swiftly turned around and marched towards the other side of the hospital. His steps were furious and temperamental. Everyone who saw him coming quickly turned their backs and went the other way because their hospital’s ace was obviously in his monster mood at the moment – wherein he wouldn’t give a f*ck to whomever would cross his path and anyone that would stop him from his goal would surely be obliterated; he’s frankly both scary and admirable when he’s in this state. He was a man on a mission – dead set on achieving it quickly and efficiently. Right now, it was his goal to drag the stubborn and sorry of an excuse basketball player back to his room, and maybe put him on isolation if he could, and finally have his shift peacefully end. His steps became more hurried and impatient as he got closer to the West wing.

He knew exactly where he was going. Oh how Minseok perfectly knew where the freaking Park pain-in-the-ass Chanyeol was hiding and how he wished he didn’t. It wasn’t his secret to share but some things just needed to be exposed in order to have a peaceful life – and this was one of them.

Trusting his instincts, he picked a room away from prying eyes and ears and then forcefully opened the door. Lo and behold, there was the eluding Park Chanyeol he was looking for. He was not alone though for the basketball player was with someone – he was with a _friend_. The two people in the room immediately stopped what they were doing and stared, gaped, disbelievingly and shockingly at the doctor. Minseok instantly threw a dark and menacing look at the athlete. “You should have at least brought your crutches with you,” he said through gritted teeth. “Your Achilles tendon is still swollen so at least try and consider your recovery,” he curtly added.

Park Chanyeol opened and closed his mouth like a damn goldfish. The athlete was obviously was at a loss at the moment. Minseok almost scoffed out loud at the pathetic state the two were in. They both looked breathless and their clothes were already discarded on the floor, only their underwear remaining. He looked disdainfully at the other person in the room. His lips were evidently swollen red. “I expected more from you, Kyungsoo-yah,” he dejectedly sighed.

Do Kyungsoo was a nurse in the hospital. He was also a dear hoobae to Minseok, a very capable staff if he was completely honest – that’s why the latter felt utmost disappointed at the other.

“The hospital isn’t a place for you to do these things,” he remarked. Minseok looked at the two of them and despondently shook his head. “How could you even do these things _with_ a patient? You know the rules, Kyungsoo! No fraternizing with patients and colleagues whilst in the hospital! Where’s your respect for your workplace?” he couldn’t help but scold them. Their relationship – if you could call it that – tremendously frustrated Minseok. _‘It’s just not right!’_ he screamed in his head.

“Yah! I don’t mind you scolding me but watch your words when you’re talking about Kyungsoo!” Park Chanyeol suddenly spoke, his deep voice reverberating in the whole room. He looked venomously at Minseok. He furiously glared at latter, his nostrils flaring with anger. The latter merely stared back, his gaze unamused.

Incredulity then flashed in the basketball player’s eyes as he continued to gaze at the doctor. “You don’t have the right to talk about decency, _Doctor Kim_,” he angrily spat. Minseok cocked his head to the side and raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean?” he asked, feeling slightly baffled. Chanyeol scoffed and sauntered towards him. His towering gait loomed over Minseok as the former stared down disgustingly at him. “As if I wouldn’t know about you! You’re _the_ Kim Minseok my friends are talking about. You’re that guy who’ll never pass an offer to have sex. Be it female _or_ male – you wouldn’t let any opportunity slip,” he stated as a matter-of-fact.

Minseok blinked a few time as he processed the athlete’s words. _‘Ah! So my other reputation already reached his ears, eh?’_ he thought. He crossed his arms over his chest and blankly looked at Park Chanyeol. “I don’t see the connection of my private matters with this,” he said as he gestured towards the athlete and the nurse. Park Chanyeol then seethed with rage.

Without thought, the athlete grabbed Minseok’s collar and pulled him close. He rubbed his rock hard cock over Minseok’s, a surprised gasp escaping from the latter. Park Chanyeol evilly smirked at him. “Looking closely, you’re pretty handsome yourself doctor,” he mockingly teased him. “Is it true? Will you really have sex with anyone who’d offer it to you?” he prodded. “How about a threesome with me and Kyungsoo, eh?” he smiled his pearly white teeth.

“Chanyeol! That’s enough!” Kyungsoo then interrupted. He tried to remove the former’s hands on Minseok but it was futile. The basketball player’s hold on him was too strong so Kyungsoo decided to soothe the giant instead. “Chanyeol, please stop,” he softly said as he massaged the other’s neck. The giant slightly wavered at Kyungsoo’s touch but he stood by his resolve. He challengingly stared at Minseok. “How about it doctor? Have you had a threesome before?” he jeered.

Minseok was honestly getting bored with the athlete’s stubbornness. With a sigh, he looked at Kyungsoo and threw him a silent apology. He then looked back at the basketball player. “Park Chanyeol-ssi,” he started, his eyes slowly travelling from the athlete’s face to his naked torso – as if memorizing every contours of the athlete’s upper body. The other slightly shivered from his intense gaze. Minseok then stared at his eyes, a mischievous smile playing on his lips. “Park Chanyeol-ssi,” he repeated. He grabbed for the athlete’s nape and pulled him close, his eyes never leaving his. Minseok puckered his lips and slowly closed his eyes. Seeing this, Park Chanyeol couldn’t help but do the same.

As his eyes closed, Minseok’s seductive look instantly turned into one of disgust. A loud thump was then heard as the petite doctor kneed, rather painfully too, the basketball player’s crotch. Park Chanyeol screamed out in pain and rolled down on the floor groaning profanities. Minseok merely looked at him. “It is true Park Chanyeol-ssi that I sleep with anyone,” he admitted. “_But_,” he stressed. “I still practice professionalism when I’m in the hospital,” he swiftly added.

He then brushed off some invisible dust from his white gown and straightened himself. He gave Kyungsoo another look. He had knelt down on the floor, trying to soothe the now whimpering giant. Minseok could only release a disappointed sigh. “I expect him to be in his room before my shift ends. He’ll be isolated for the whole week and Krystal would be the one solely to take care of him,” was all he said before exiting the room.

**

Truth be told, Minseok was greatly troubled. He had arrived in his office, his mind muddled together and his heart tremendously uneasy. There was this certain heaviness in his chest that he couldn’t simply shake off. He stared at his own reflection in the mirror and saw his current horrid state. Frankly, He was a total mess. His large eyes looked exhausted and lifeless, his chubby cheeks had sadly disappeared, and his mouth seemed to be permanently curved into a frown – Minseok couldn’t even recognize himself to be quite honest.

Something inside of him has been boggling Minseok, troubling him endlessly in his sleepless nights. His mind was screaming for only one thing. He looked down at his slightly aroused member, a groan escaping from his lips. “Again?” he lowly grumbled. Honestly, Minseok has been getting aroused easily these past couple of days. Even a simple touch would surely turn him on. And strangely enough, he has this dire need to get f*cked shameless. There was just this growing hunger inside of him – the want to be filled and be wrecked greatly overwhelmed his mind. He has never allowed anyone inside of him though. Well, except for _that person_.

His heart constricted in his chest, needle-like pricks hurting him with each memory his mind has suddenly reminisced. Minseok pursed his lips and furiously shook his head. He desperately tried to push the horrid memories away, pleading his thoughts to quiet down. “No more. Please no more,” he whispered to himself.

He then felt his member twitch in need. Regrettably, he had remembered how that person would always hold him and embrace him – as if he was some precious Chinaware who might break anytime. He also remembered his kisses. He could even feel the butterfly kisses that person used to do all over his chest. He honestly loved those wet and sloppy kisses. His member twitched again. Minseok uneasily breathed out.

_‘You don’t have the right to talk about decency, Doctor Kim,’ _Park Chanyeol’s words then repeated in his mind. Minseok groaned in annoyance as he remembered the cocky basketball player’s face when he said those words. “Decency my ass,” he couldn’t help but scoff. His eyes then wandered towards his reflection again. Another sigh escaped from him. “Just this once,” he softly mumbled. “I’ll just do this here once,” he stated, a little louder this time.

Resolve quickly settled inside of him. Minseok scanned his small office in deep thought. He removed everything atop his table. His files, his picture frames, and even his doctor title plaque – he cleared each and every one of them and carefully placed them on his coffee table. He then gingerly took off his clothes. His white gown, his necktie, his dress shirt and pants, as well as his socks and underwear – he discarded them all, neatly folding and laying them on his couch. Minseok couldn’t help but chuckle lightly as he admired his reflection in the mirror. He was seriously butt-naked after all. He then turned to the table and nodded to himself. “Let’s get this over and done with then,” he mumbled before walking towards the empty table.

He first sat at the edge of the table, slowly finding the spot where he felt most comfortable. And when he finally did, oddly enough he had found himself facing the mirror. He prepped his elbows on the table for support then spread his legs wide. He stared at his own reflection as he did so. “This is a bit kinky, isn’t it?” he mused to himself. He opened his legs even wider.

Minseok grabbed for his exposed member, a groan escaping his lips at the feeling. He began to stroke himself, his pace slow and languid. He pushed his head back as he gradually felt the familiar bliss of euphoria. He then licked his two fingers, completely wetting them since he didn’t have any lube in the office. He reached down and slowly circled the rim of his hole, his entrance opening and closing in anticipation. His heart was beating wildly in his chest too. Minseok finally inserted one finger and then another. A gasp escaped his lips at the sensation. He pushed his fingers inside of him deeply and then pulled them out quickly. His thrusts were the same pace as his strokes. A moan then escaped from him.

He inserted another finger and thrusted even more deeply inside of him. His other hand had abandoned his already hard member and had decided to play with his left nipple instead. Minseok pinched and tweaked the pert knob, abusing the little thing. Another moan rolled off his lips. He could feel his cock already leaking with pre-cum. He then hastened his pace, his grip on his member tightening with his increased speed.

His eyes wandered towards the mirror in front of him. He was pumping himself, teasing and playing with nipples, and sweat was covering his entire body. Kim Minseok was certainly a sight to behold at the moment. His gaze was hooded – lust clearly evident in his large and dark orbs. He oddly felt even more aroused with his reflection.

As he continued on satisfying himself, Minseok failed to notice his door open. A slim figure entered his office, his movement silent and stealth. Then there was a click. The stranger had apparently locked the door. And this time Minseok had noticed.

His hands instantly stopped what they were doing and immediately covered himself, not caring if the stranger had already seen everything of him. Covering themselves was everyone’s first thought in this kind of situation after all. He cursed under his breath for being so careless. _‘How can I forget something as important as locking the door?’_ he internally berated himself. Minseok was just praying it was not Kyungsoo, or worse Park Chanyeol, who has caught him. His earlier words would have been ironic if it was indeed one of them.

With hesitant yet curious eyes, Minseok looked up and stared at the intruder. He couldn’t stop the gasp that escaped from him. His eyes rounded remarkably when he saw a familiar face. It was not his dear hoobae Kyungsoo or the arrogant athlete Park Chanyeol but rather it was someone he had known for a number of years, a hoobae he had grown closely familiar with. Minseok then felt it would have been better if it was either of the two instead of this person. Anyone would do if he was honest. Anyone would have been okay – seriously anyone but Byun Baekhyun_._

Minseok nervously gulped as Baekhyun slowly walked towards him, his eyes carefully scanning the former’s whole body. He hasn’t felt more naked in his entire life to be quite honest. Byun Baekhyun’s gaze was just too much for him – too intense, too deep, and too extreme for him to handle. It was as if he was admiring and engraving the other’s body in his mind. Minseok’s heart pounded crazily in his chest. He couldn’t even move an inch as his shock rendered him immobile. Thrill and arousal strangely stirred at the pits of his stomach though as Baekhyun continued to stare at him.

“Hyung,” Baekhyun lowly muttered, his bangs slightly covering his eyes. He was standing only an inch away from Minseok. The latter simply raised an eyebrow as a response. Baekhyun leaned in and blew on his ear. A jolt of electricity instantly sent Minseok into a mental and sexual frenzy. His cock quivered in need. Minseok gulped anxiously.

Baekhyun nuzzled his nose into the crook of Minseok’s neck and tenderly kissed the soft skin. The older couldn’t help but bask in the sweet action. A grumble bubbled in his throat when the other regrettably pulled away. Minseok met Baekhyun’s eyes, his eyebrows creased and his lips curved into a frown. “Wha-what are you doing, Byun Baekhyun?” he managed to say albeit his voice being shaky and a little breathless. “Use me, hyung,” the other then answered. Minseok’s eyebrows knotted even deeper. “Huh?” he pathetically said. His mind was certainly in chaos at the moment.

_‘What does he mean by use him?’_ Minseok thought as he stared confusedly at his hoobae. _‘What’s happening inside Byun Baekhyun mind exactly?’_

The younger smiled at him, his smile as dazzling and bright as ever. “Use me hyung. I’ll be your sex toy. Use me to your lust’s content,” he then offered.

Minseok’s mind instantly became a complete blank. His eyes widened, both taken aback and surprised with his hoobae’s shameless words. He was shocked to his very core to say the least. _‘Use him?’_ he mulled over the thought. He nervously gulped down the lump that had formed in his throat. His lips pursed as he carefully considered Baekhyun. He has known the younger ever since their high school days. The latter was his younger brother’s best friend after all. His mouth twisted uncomfortably. _‘Use him?’ _His eyebrows creased deeply._ ‘For sex?’_ Minseok was honestly torn between the right and the wrong.

If he would accept Baekhyun’s offer, Minseok would be going against his number one rule – never sleep with any of his colleagues. But there was something at the back of his mind, gnawing at him and egging him on, as if having sex with Baekhyun would be the best solution. Minseok’s gut churned, anxiety filling inside of him.

“Hyung~” Baekhyun whispered in his ear again. Minseok couldn’t help the shiver that went down his spine. He slightly turned his head and gazed at the younger, his eyes going dark with lust. Minseok unconsciously licked his lips. He leaned in and feathered the other’s neck with soft kisses.

When he reached Baekhyun’s ear, he teasingly nibbled on the lobe. The younger simply grumbled at this. Minseok then whispered to the younger, his voice husky and seductive. The latter couldn’t help but shudder expectantly. Minseok whispered, “Fuck me senseless.”


	3. His Gaze

Minseok lay awake and unmoving on his bed, his eyes dazedly staring at the ceiling. Stillness and darkness had filled the entire room. The faint ticking of the clock as the second hand moved from one mark to another echoed monotonously; its sound seemingly betraying the quietness of the night.

It was already late in the evening, the sun long gone from the sky. It had set hours ago and hid itself on the other side of the world but the young doctor hadn’t exactly noticed the change of day. He was too preoccupied, too engrossed, and too immersed with his thoughts. He was too distracted to say the least.

He pursed his lips as thoughts of what had happened earlier bombarded his mind. He had twisted and turned under his covers and had tried to bury the incident deep in his subconscious but it just wouldn’t budge from popping inside his head. What had happened just kept on coming back at him – plaguing him, haunting him and gnawing at him to no end. He was seriously having a hard time not thinking about it to be quite honest.

Now, regret had already consumed Minseok’s whole being. He was tremendously berating himself for his actions.

He knew he should have rejected his junior’s offer. He knew he should have simply brushed off the other’s words. He shouldn’t have considered it at all.

No matter how needy, how desperate, and how pathetic Minseok was at that time, he shouldn’t have gone against his policy. It was his promise to himself after all – an oath he desperately tried to follow in order to maintain his professionalism, albeit his promiscuous affairs. He knew there were consequences especially if he ever slept with one of his colleagues. _‘Everything came with a cost after all,’_ he grimly thought. Minseok knew his carelessness and lapse of judgment would eventually bite him in the ass sooner or later. He was just not excited or thrilled to face these consequences, so to speak.

It was his mistake. It was his fault. It was his doing. Minseok clearly knew he shouldn’t have agreed. Oh how much he terribly knew! It was certainly his negligence that led him to these troubled musings.

A heavy sigh then escaped from his lips. He should have turned down Byun Baekhyun yet he didn’t. “Why didn’t I refuse him?” he mumbled to himself. “Why did I let him inside me?” he wondered as he shook his head in shame.

His thoughts were then filled with images of Baekhyun, overwhelming him and gripping every thread of his consciousness. The way his dark brown eyes intently stared at him, the way his long and beautiful fingers gently caressed him, and the way his dominant drives passionately took him and wrecked him – just every little thing Byun Baekhyun did to him was etched in his mind. They were all undeniably engraved in Minseok’s memory.

An involuntary shiver went down his spine as Minseok recalled everything. He clearly remembered every damn thing. The details were just so vivid, so lewd, in his mind; he couldn’t help but choke out a muffled whimper. His body was tingling with the sensation of Baekhyun’s lingering kisses and touches, as if the younger was still with him. Minseok could still seriously feel the hot trails the younger had left on him from earlier. They seemed to have permanently imprinted themselves onto his skin.

He couldn’t believe it if Minseok was completely honest. It seemed like his mind could only come up with thoughts of Byun Baekhyun and his tender touches at the moment. He suddenly cursed under his breath when he felt the familiar tightness coming from his lower region. “Why am I getting aroused with a simple memory?” he whispered incredulously to himself.

With a shake of his head, Minseok decided to have an extremely cold shower in the middle of the night. As much as he wanted to simply jerk himself off, he knew he’d only be thinking of Baekhyun if he did. And Minseok wouldn’t allow the younger to have that kind of power over him. He couldn’t masturbate at the thought of his hoobae. His pride wouldn’t allow him to.

It was already late in the night, the moon high above in the evening sky. Minseok pegged it was nearing the midnight. He has work in the morning and he knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep if he’s this terribly aroused. So with stubbornness and determination excessively swirling inside of him, Minseok got up from his immobile state on his bed and rushed towards the bathroom.

_‘Let’s get this over and done with,_’ he thought before turning the shower knob. Minseok stared down at his already hard member. He annoyingly clicked his tongue. _‘And quickly too!’_

**

There were eyes obviously following him. It was only the first hour of his duty, still so early in the morning, yet Minseok could clearly feel someone was staring at him – closely and intently watching his every movement. The person must be observing him, the doctor supposed; his gaze was rather calculating and extremely careful the latter noticed.

Even without looking, Minseok could feel the intensity of that person’s stare. There was just this certain pull, a very strong sense of gravity the other’s dark brown orbs would definitely hold if he met his gaze. Minseok was sure that person staring at him with those piercing and unrelenting gaze he remembered oh so well. It was something Minseok could never erase from his mind after all. _‘How can I forget?’_ he thought with a scoff. _‘As much as I wanted to look away from his gaze, I couldn’t. I was frozen in place _ _with its intensity,’ _he internally sighed. _‘It was just… it’s different. His gaze was definitely different,’_he mused._ ‘I was honestly drawn by them.’_

Minseok then felt goosebumps spread throughout his entire body. He suddenly felt like he was some unknown specimen being put under the microscope. He was starting to get distracted from his work actually. The stares were rather bold in his opinion – blatantly gazing at the doctor despite the crowded hallways of the hospital. There were many patients, nurses, doctors, as well as visitors in the hospital especially in this time of day; that person was quite daring if Minseok was completely honest. The elder doctor tried to maintain his straight and poker face.

A melodious laugh then greeted his ears. It was familiar. It was _his_ laughter after all. Minseok turned around and saw two figures coming down from the hallway. One was in a wheelchair while the other was pushing it. _‘Speak of the devil,’_ Minseok thought. The two were talking animatedly with each other and their faces were filled with ear-reaching smiles. You could clearly see they were enjoying each other’s company. The young doctor’s lips involuntarily tugged downwards.

“Byun Baekhyun,” he tersely called out one of them. The said person immediately met his gaze. His laughing smile turned into a somehow smirk. He cocked an eyebrow at Minseok. “Missed me hyung?” the younger teased him, his eyes twinkling with obvious delight and mirth. The latter’s gaze slightly squinted into slits as he felt a tad miffed with his hoobae’s bravado. _‘He’s seriously getting ahead of himself lately,’_ he internally grumbled. The elder merely clicked his tongue at the other in annoyance.

His eyes then wandered towards the person on the wheelchair. The tanned male flashed him a guilty grin while he played with the crutches on his lap. “Where are you taking Jongin?” Minseok asked the younger doctor, a hint of suspicion evident in his voice.

Kim Jongin was another one of their all-star patients in the hospital. He’s a rising rookie forward under the EXODUS basketball team and he’s already made quite a name for himself. Regrettably, his hip got dislocated during one of their games thus his admittance in their hospital. It has already been a few months after the incident and he’s pretty much regained his normal stature but he’s still under observation of course. “Even though he could move on his own right now, you know his injury is still in the recovery stage,” Minseok started to scold his hoobae. He then suspiciously stared at Baekhyun, his eyebrows slightly knotting together. “Are you trying to sneak him out of the hospital again?” he accusingly asked the other.

Baekhyun looked at him with wide eyes; he was surprised and a tad taken aback. “Wha~~~t?” the younger dramatically drawled out. “Me? Trying to sneak Jongin out?” he continued his dramatics. He then furiously shook his head. “I won’t do such a thing knowing you forbid it!” he exclaimed. “I have never, in my entire life, ever gone against your words sunbae. I have always followed what you told me! I adhere to your words like my life depended on it!” he exaggeratedly finished.

Minseok merely stared at him, unamused and a little indifferent. He was already used to Byun Baekhyun’s antics after all. He then raised a curious eyebrow at his junior. “Then why is he out here? And on a wheelchair?” the elder prodded as he nodded his head towards the rueful athlete. “Jongin’s supposed to be doing his rehabilitation exercises with Yixing in the gym right now,” he added, his voice slightly rising.

His junior bit his lower lip and scratched the back of his neck. Baekhyun then looked away from his heated glare. “Really?” he answered with an awkward chuckle. The younger flashed him a sheepish smile. “I must have forgotten about it,” he guiltily mumbled with a pout. Minseok released an exasperated sigh. His head was starting to ache to be quite honest. Byun Baekhyun was really getting on his last nerve. He threw a warning look towards his junior. “Byun Baekhyun,” he said through gritted teeth. His tongue was seriously itching to give the younger doctor a piece of his mind.

“Don’t blame him, doctor!” Jongin suddenly spoke up. The two turned their heads to him as the athlete tried to stand up from the wheelchair. Baekhyun quickly rushed towards the other and helped him. The athlete swiftly flashed him a grateful smile. He then turned towards Minseok whilst on his crutches. “I asked Baekhyun hyung to take me out,” he told the elder. “I begged him to,” he timidly added, his eyes downcast and a tad sad.

_‘Baekhyun hyung?’_ Minseok thought with a raised brow. He noticed the athlete was blushing slightly. Despite Jongin’s tanned skin, you could still detect the faint flush on his cheeks to be honest. He then glanced towards the younger doctor. Baekhyun was staring at the rookie athlete, his lips jutted into a pout. His hoobe somehow looked a little dejected. _‘Is it because I caught them?’_ he pondered in his mind. Minseok internally shook his head and released a sigh. He, now too, felt somewhat dejected. “Fine,” he huffed in exasperation. “I’ll let you skip the exercises for now,” he told the athlete. Jongin’s ears perked up and his head instantly snapped up to Minseok. “Seriously?” he asked with hopeful eyes. The athlete honestly looked like a puppy getting a treat from his owner in some way the elder doctor noted. Minseok nodded with a chuckle. “Yeah, seriously,” he replied.

Jongin and Baekhyun bumped their knuckles together, their faces now adorning wide grins. The elder couldn’t help but roll his eyes. “But!” he then stressed. The two immediately looked at him with expectant eyes. “But?” Baekhyun carefully prodded, his eyebrows slightly raised. “But the next time Jongin’s going to have his rehabilitation exercises,” Minseok drawled out. He could see the anticipation in their eyes. The elder internally snickered at their pathetic faces. “Taehyung’s going to be the one who’ll be assisting him not Yixing,” he finished with a smirk.

The athlete’s mouth hung wide open. He was clearly taken aback with Minseok’s condition. “Sunbae!” Baekhyun couldn’t help but react, disbelief and incredulity obvious in his voice. Everyone in the hospital knew the young nurse named Kim Taehyung was an oddball. He’s fairly decent as a person but the kid has his own world most of the time. Taehyung’s extremely capable as a nurse yet he’s too weird for comfort – he’s an alien among the earthlings to be quite frank.

Minseok then smiled widely at the two gawking males in front of him. He gave each other a light pat on the shoulder as he walked passed them. “Don’t sneak out patients again, Byun Baekhyun. It’s against hospital policy letting them out without permission from their doctor-in-charge. And if you do repeat this again, don’t let me be the one to catch you. You wouldn’t like what I’d do to you as punishment if ever,” the elder warningly whispered to his hoobae. He oddly felt a tingle; some sort of faint shock as he made contact with Baekhyun’s shoulder. Minseok was a little confused about this yet he simply shrugged it off.

He then heard his hoobae snicker. Minseok raised a curious eyebrow at Baekhyun who was smirking rather cheekily at him. The junior leaned into his ear, Baekhyun’s breath slightly tickling his neck. “I like it when you talk dirty to me _hyung_,” he softly whispered. “I’ll make sure you’ll catch me next time because I can’t wait for what you’ll _do_ to me,” he seductively added.

The elder couldn’t help the involuntary shiver that went down his spine. He knew what his junior was trying to do. Minseok gulped anxiously and carefully glanced at Baekhyun. _‘There it is again,’_ he thought to himself. _‘He’s staring at me like that again,’_ he mentally noted as he immediately recognized the familiar gaze on his hoobae’s eyes. It was the same gaze that was haunting Minseok on the entirety of his duty.

He honestly felt himself getting lost in the tantalizing dark brown orbs of Byun Baekhyun. The longer he stared, the deeper he felt himself getting reeled in, getting pulled in, and getting absorbed in them. Byun Baekhyun’s eyes were a whirlpool of mysteries for Minseok in all honesty. He always had a hard time understanding his hoobae’s stares because they were too confusing for him. They seemed to be too open, too exposed of his emotions yet at the same time they weren’t; as if their openness was a mere cover for Baekhyun’s real feelings. Minseok pursed his lips as he became even more confused. _‘You’re thinking too much,’_ he told himself.

“Just don’t sneak out patients anymore,” was all the elder had said before hastily walking away from the two. “Gladly hyung!” he heard Baekhyun shout from behind.

Minseok didn’t spare his junior another glance, he just kept on walking until he was already a far distance from them. When he made a turn on the corner of the hallway, he checked if he was alone. After making sure, Minseok slumped down on the floor and leaned his head on the wall. He closed his eyes and felt his wildly beating heart in his chest. “What the actual f*ck are you doing Byun Baekhyun?” he muttered under his breath. He bit his lower lip and tried to calm himself down. He was surprisingly – or maybe not – aroused yet again because of his hoobae.

He then grimly shook his head and frustratingly grumbled. “No. What the heck is wrong with me?”


	4. Fleeting

He oddly felt troubled. Or maybe uncomfortable would be the right word he was looking for? Well, he wasn’t certain on what he was feeling but one thing’s for sure, Minseok did not like what he was seeing in front of him at the moment.

A dark scowl had permanently set itself on the doctor’s face. His eyebrows were deeply knotted together in irritation too. He was certainly not in the greatest moods. Everyone would have noticed his foul mood if not for their drunken state. The people Minseok was currently with were drunk – terribly wasted to their very wits to be exact. The doctor couldn’t help but release an exasperated sigh.

“What’s up, Doctor Grumpy?” a voice suddenly said as an arm unexpectedly slung over his shoulders. Minseok turned to the person beside him and raised an eyebrow. “Grumpy?” he repeated the other’s words, a hint of incredulity in his tone. “Yes grumpy!” the person swiftly answered with a firm nod. “You’ve been brooding ever since we arrived here you know! It’s as if you came here with your ex-lover or something,” he commented with a wave of his hand, his voice slightly slurring.

The doctor scoffed. _‘Ex-lover? Pfft. Yeah, right!’_ Minseok mused to himself. He found the other’s words somehow humorous. He then shook his head and grabbed for the glass of beer in front of him. He downed the liquid in one smooth gulp. “Woah! Daebak hyung!” the person beside him then gushed with wide eyes. “You drank all of it in one go!” he added in amazement, his voice obvious with admiration. Minseok merely rolled his eyes. “That’s not the only thing I could do, Jongin,” he commented with a chuckle. The doctor grabbed for a shot glass of whatever hard liquid they had ordered and another glass of beer. He made a bomb drink and that too, Minseok downed in one go. The young athlete clapped his hands in bewilderment and urged the doctor to do another trick. The elder couldn’t help but concede to the rookie’s pleas. He grabbed two glasses of beer and planned on drinking them at the same time.

His gaze then wandered towards the person, or rather persons in front of him. The sight made Minseok seriously peeved and so he slugged the two glasses of without any reservations. He was extremely annoyed and he has no idea why. And it irked him to no end.

Minseok was in a noraebang with a huge group of people. It wasn’t his usual scene – he seriously avoided going to these kinds of places – but he couldn’t simply turn down the offer.

It was a Friday night and coincidentally Jongin, the rookie basketball player he was in-charged off, was released from their hospital today. The young athlete asked him, as well as other people from the hospital, out for drinks to show his gratitude for their care.

Jongin invited Kyungsoo, Yixing, and Zitao because they were the nurses who were mainly responsible with assisting his treatments. He also invited Kim Joonmyeon, another doctor who was assisting him, whom the athlete unexpectedly became good friends with during his stay in the hospital. The two strangely became close like brothers. And then there was another person Jongin had invited much to Minseok’s dismay. He and Joonmyeon weren’t the only doctors invited – _that person_ was also invited to join them despite his non-involvement in the athlete’s treatment. _That person_ was close with Jongin after all; extremely close as far as Minseok’s memories served him right.

In all honesty, _that person _was the reason why the doctor seemed a little uncomfortable as everyone, together with a few people from Jongin’s team and their staff, got together tonight.

_That person_ was having quite a good time in Minseok’s opinion. He was dancing and singing like an idiot; which was already his normal state but with alcohol in his system, he was taking things worryingly to another level. He was getting tremendously close and touchy with the other people they were with. _That person_ sang and danced in front of him, tightly clinging onto people and loudly laughing his ass out at whatever silly things they whispered in his ear – it oddly affected Minseok to be quite honest.

There was just this uncomfortable and foreboding feeling at the pits of his stomach as the doctor stared yet again at _that person_, his arm wrapped clumsily around the waist of one of Jongin’s teammates whose name he believed was Taemin. They were singing along to Girl’s Generations’ Gee, dancing a few of its choreography, and laughing hysterically at themselves. They were too drunk to even do a simple shake of their hips actually. Honestly, they looked like idiots with their singing and dancing.

Everyone in the room, except Minseok, watched them in amusement and happily clapped their hands as they continued to make a fool of themselves in front. The two were clearly, as bright as day, enjoying and having the time of their lives though. Minseok couldn’t help but click his tongue in irritation as _that person_ smiled that annoying rectangular smile of his like he had no care in the world.

_‘Well, he’s that kind of person though,’_ he internally grumbled.

Their impromptu performance then finished and everyone was applauding at the two, rather dramatically too. Minseok simply gave them a timid clap of his hands, his eyes subtly rolled and obviously bored.

His gaze then suddenly met with _that person _again. Minseok’s heartbeat momentarily stopped in his chest. He felt the tiny muscle was being squeezed by something. He nervously gulped down the lump on his throat. All of a sudden, he felt a tad parched. The doctor gulped again and then pursed his lips, his gaze never leaving _that person_’s.

“Want to try and sing a song with me sunbae?” his smooth voice then rang in his ears. Despite the noisiness and chatter of everyone around him, Minseok could clearly hear _that person_ without much difficulty. He raised an eyebrow and looked at _that person_ like he had grown three heads. “I’d rather not thank you very much,” the doctor replied with a shake of his head. He then crossed his arms over his chest as he sat back on his back. He stared at _that person_ in the eyes and shrugged. “Plus I’m not a huge fan of singing. You know that,” he nonchalantly added.

“Oh come on sunbae! You have one of the best voices I’ve ever heard. Why aren’t you fond of singing?! What’s the use of that sexy voice of yours?” _that person_ loudly babbled. Minseok’s eyebrows shot up in surprise, slightly dumbfounded. _‘He thinks I have a sexy voice?’_ he wondered to himself. _‘Is he teasing me again?_’ A frown instantly made its way onto his lips. “You’re shitting me. I don’t have that kind of voice,” he then answered, feeling a tad conscious now. The doctor awkwardly cleared his throat and looked away. He grabbed for another glass of beer and gingerly took a sip. He could feel _that person_’s gaze was still on him.

“Really? Doctor Kim’s a good singer?” Eric Mun, the head coach of Jongin’s team, suddenly spoke. Minseok then felt everyone was staring at him. He bit his lower lip, feeling a little embarrassed with the attention. _That person_ furiously nodded his head and made a cross in his heart. “Cross my heart hope to die! I swear to the River of Styx he’s a talented singer! Ballad songs suit him seriously well. He rarely sings but when he does, prepare to be blown away! He definitely has one of the sweetest and best voices ever!” _that person _gushed.

The doctor felt his cheeks flush red with his hoobae’s praise. Minseok believed he wasn’t much of a good singer compared to the others. He was just average if he was fairly honest with himself.

Everyone then started urging him to sing a song. “Kim Minseok! Kim Minseok! Kim Minseok!” they repeated over and over, their voices determined and unwavering. It was obvious they were adamant on making him sing. He whipped his head towards _that person_ and threw him death glares. “Why did you tell them about my singing? You know I hate these kinds of things,” he hissed, annoyance clear in his voice. _That person_ melodiously laughed at his irritated face. His eyes were filled with mirth and obvious amusement. “I told you to sing a duet with me yet you refused. So, I had no choice but to make you sing a solo,” he answered with a shrug. Minseok’s glare turned even more deadly with his response.

Their cheers got louder and Minseok then felt utterly defeated. The doctor dejectedly stood up from his seat and reached for the song book. “Just one song, okay?” he said through gritted teeth. Everyone applauded and waited expectantly for the doctor’s performance.

As Minseok looked for a song, he had another glass of bomb drink in order to ease his nerves. _‘Why am I doing this again?’_ he wondered as he sifted through the pages. _‘I could have simply refused or just said I needed to go home because of an emergency. Why the hell am I seriously choosing a song for this stupid thing? _His eyes then met _that person_’s again. The other smiled at him, his ever dazzling rectangular smile making the doctor’s heart feel a tad uneasy. _That person_ then gave him a thumbs up and mouth _‘fighting!’_ Minseok couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped his lips. _‘It’s his fault why I’m in this situation yet why am I not that annoyed,’_ he mulled over his thoughts. _‘I’m just drunk, I guess,’_ he thought with a shrug.

A song then made his hands stop searching. He raised an eyebrow as he pondered on whether to sing it or not. Minseok oddly felt drawn towards this certain song. A smile unconsciously made its way onto his lips. _‘Oh! Why not?’_ He then decided to sing that song.

The doctor quickly inputted the code and grabbed for the mic. He looked at everyone and smiled nervously. They were all staring at him, full of expectations and curiosity. Frankly, he felt a little flattered as his hoobae thought greatly of him yet he was still tense. His palms were starting to sweat too. He hasn’t sung in front of people in such a long time. Heck he hasn’t even been in a noraebang ever since he was in high school. Minseok made it a point to never visit one to be quite honest. Someone he used to know liked going to these places and the doctor was vehement on forgetting everything. He wanted to forget those times actually.

As the song title appeared on the screen, _that person_ looked at him with wide eyes. “Oh my God! This is like my favorite song ever! DBSK’s Asu Wa Kuru Kara is definitely one of the best ever! A classic I tell you!” he animatedly gushed about the song. His whole appearance looked giddy and hyper. “Can I sing it with you, sunbae?” he then pleaded. “Let me sing with you, sunbae! Please~ Please _hyung~_” he added with a pout. The doctor raised an eyebrow. “No, I don’t want to,” the elder immediately answered. “But _hyung~_” the other pleaded again. “Shut up, Byun Baekhyun! If you want to sing, you can just sing along from where you are. I don’t want to have a duet with you okay,” he exasperatedly sighed. The younger doctor pouted but nodded nonetheless. The song had finally started to play.

“Grumpy Minseok hyung, I hate you,” the elder faintly heard from the other. He stared at the younger doctor again, feeling extremely amused. _‘Aish! This person really!’_ he mused as he mentally shook his head at the other’s silliness. “Yah, Byun Baekhyun!” he suddenly screamed through the mic. His hoobae jumped in his seat and stared at him with wide and confused eyes. He seriously looked like a puppy for the elder. A smile was now playing on his lips. Minseok curled his fingers, signaling for the other to come to him. “Sing with me, you babo,” he told the other. Baekhyun immediately stood up and made his way towards him and then grabbed for another mic.

The two then sung together, their eyes twinkling with utmost pleasure and glee.

Despite the seriously passionate and a tad serious tone of the song, Minseok felt himself enjoying the moment. He was feeling wonderful to be quite frank. Delight and euphoria was surging throughout his veins. His heart was soaring with bliss. The doctor felt lighter, and honestly happier.

Minseok oddly felt a little less empty and he liked it.

**

A beeping sound rang in Minseok’s ears. He stirred in his drunken sleep. He was on someone’s back but he was too far out to recognize who was carrying him. The doctor then heard a few fumbling and his brother’s grumpy voice. “How many did he drink to get this drunk?” he faintly heard Jongdae. The younger Kim was clearly pissed off. The person who was carrying him shrugged his shoulders. “I lost count. He had a lot of bomb drinks to be quite honest,” they sighed. “What made him drink so much though?” his brother then asked. “I don’t know. Maybe he just enjoyed himself too much? He was brooding at first but he let himself loose after a few rounds of beer and singing,” the other answered.

Minseok oddly felt drawn to that voice. He snuggled his head onto that person’s neck and sighed in satisfaction. He heard the person chuckle at his action. A smile was now etched onto the doctor’s lips.

“As long as it’s not because of _him_ then I guess it is okay,” Jongdae said with a sigh. Minseok suddenly felt the person carrying him freeze. He clicked his tongue. “Don’t remind me of that cursed person,” he tersely grumbled. His brother softly chuckled. The doctor could see the younger Kim rolling his eyes at the same time too. “Yeah, yeah. My bad! Sorry about that,” he simply said.

“Good night then, Jongdae-yah. I’ll sleep over tonight okay?” the person then said to his brother. “Where are you going to sleep?” Minseok could see Jongdae staring at the person with a raised brow, his stare slightly squinted. “Uhm. Your room?” the other uncertainly answered. Jongdae then snickered. “Why not in hyung’s?” The younger Kim’s voice had a hint of teasing in them. “Yah!” the person couldn’t help but react.

Minseok somehow felt the person was immensely blushing at the moment. The doctor oddly felt a little pleased with the other’s reaction. His brother then laughed his trolling laugh. It was a mixture of wicked and playful – his laugh was somewhat creepy to be quite honest.

“Good night, my dear best friend! Sleep where you want to sleep! I won’t stop you at all,” his brother said. He heard steps fading; maybe Jongdae was going into his room. “Just don’t be loud, okay?” the younger Kim added. “Yah Kim Jongdae!” the other person half-yelled and half-hissed. He heard his brother’s trolling laugh again, rather obnoxiously too. Minseok then heard a door shut to a close. The person who was carrying him heavily groaned. “Why am I best friends with him again?” he grumbled. Minseok stirred in his sleep again, his hold tightening on the other. “Oh, right! Hyung’s room~ Hyung’s room~” the latter said. He then started walking to what Minseok believed was his room.

The doctor heard a door creak open. He then felt his back meet the familiar softness of his bed. The person snuggly tucked him under his covers and even gently caressed his cheek. Minseok couldn’t help but lean on the warm hand. He sighed contentedly at the touch.

The person then hummed a sweet lullaby. It honestly lulled Minseok to sleep. He slightly opened his eyes and saw a mop of light brown hair in front of him. The shade reminded him of someone. It reminded Minseok of _him._ He wanted to open his eyes more and look more closely. “Luhannie?” he drowsily mumbled. He wanted to make sure if he was hallucinating or not. Yet his eyelids closed, extremely heavy with sleep. “Luhannie. Luhannie. Luhannie,” he repeatedly mumbled.

Minseok was then overwhelmed with sleep and his consciousness slowly fading into the abyss. “Luhannie,” he mumbled one last time, unaware of the rigid expression of the person in front him. He succumbed into the darkness, his heart filled with emptiness yet again.


	5. Brothers

A moan suddenly escaped from his lips. Minseok stirred in his sleep. His mind was still clouded with drunkenness and sleep. His eyebrows furrowed together as he felt something from his lower regions. Something just felt so alive – so _hard_. His face scrunched up as his mouth opened in a silent whimper.

There was a hand wrapped around his member, he realized, their grip firm and rather strong. A groan bubbled from the back of his throat as arousal slowly grew inside of him. The unknown person stroked languidly and quite painstakingly; the pace steady, slow, and lazy as if teasing him– it irked Minseok in all honesty. He then felt himself stand in full attention; his member in its longest and hardest with pre-cum slightly leaking. A thumb then teasingly rubbed the slit of his head while delicate fingers massaged his sacs. Another moan escaped from him, pretty loud and clearly filled with lust. His head was already spinning with want and desire. Euphoria was surging throughout his veins, a familiar high rousing inside of him. It had been so long since someone made him feel like this – writhing and terribly helpless in their hands. Somehow he could see the person smirking at him because of his reaction. It aroused Minseok even more. Their languid movements continued.

His member was suddenly left unattended. It twitched uncomfortably, desperate for release of the built up sensation inside of him. A frown instantly made its way onto his face, his eyebrows knotting together. He was about to open his eyes when hot and cold suddenly overwhelmed his senses. He gasped out loud, surprised and startled with the unexpected sensation. The person has swallowed him, an ice cube also inside their mouth.

The contrasting temperatures made Minseok crazy with extreme pleasure. His mind had completely gone blank. “F*ck!” he couldn’t help but curse out loud. His hands went down and blindly grabbed onto the person’s hair, tightly gripping onto the locks. The person swirled the ice cube with his tongue as they took him inside their mouth and then out. “Oh my God!” Minseok moaned out lustfully. He was seriously going insane because of the sensation. Every cell in his body was tingling with arousal. His hips jerked upwards, pushing his member into the person’s mouth ever more. He heard the person groan, or was it a moan? It made Minseok’s member twitch in want. Their moan oddly sounded familiar though.

They then placed their hands on his sides to keep him steady, gently massaging them with soothing circles. Minseok almost cooed at the sweetness of the gesture. He could tell the person was treating him with utmost care as if he was some fine Chinaware. It honestly made his heart soar with affection.

The person then went back on pumping him, their pace faster than before. The mixture of gentleness and roughness the person was giving him – it was honestly driving him to the edge. He could feel himself getting closer and closer.

Minseok trembled with anticipation. The person gave him butterfly kisses from his torso and then down towards his inner thighs. He knew what was going to happen next. A lubed finger then traced his opening, teasingly going in and then quickly going out. He couldn’t help but groan in frustration.

He heard the person chuckle at his reaction and it made him even more frustrated. Here he was, already writhing and whimpering in anticipation – which was a rare sight to be quite honest – and the person still continued on with their teasing. He was actually close to screaming at the person to get it over and done with. Minseok was desperate – tremendously desperate to be exact.

Two lubed fingers suddenly entered him, earning a suppressed moan from Minseok. As much as he was already expecting it, he was still not prepared with the sensation. They pushed their fingers in and out of him. Their fast yet steady pace was the same with their pumping – it was pushing Minseok more and more towards his climax. His mind was already spinning from all the different sensations overwhelming him.

The person then gently kissed his torso, showering the exposed skin with sloppy kisses here and there, as another finger was inserted inside of him. The kisses distracted him from the pain. Minseok writhed helplessly. He was feeling so much – oh so much, at the moment. He was breathing heavily and moaning endlessly. He couldn’t help but mewl under the person’s touches. He was, without a doubt, at the their mercy.

His release was gradually coming to a close too. The familiar sensation of his toes curling and the swirling hotness at the pit of his stomach – Minseok was definitely feeling his climax come to a close. The person seemed to have noticed it too as they quickened their pace, stroking his member at an awfully fast movement and abused his hole with even more violent thrusts.

Minseok’s moans got louder and louder, and even more lustful with every thrust and pump the person did to him. “God!” “F*ck!” “Faster!” “Deeper!” he cried out. He wasn’t much of a screamer but oddly he wanted the person to hear him. He wanted them to know how much they’re making a mess out of him. He wanted them to know how undone he has become because of their doing. He strongly wanted them to know and he seriously had no idea why.

His member was then back on the person’s mouth, sucking him hard and deep, as their fingers still thrusted deep within him. Minseok couldn’t help it anymore. With one more thrust and stroke, he moaned out loud, releasing everything inside of him.

The person sucked him, swallowing every bit of his essence. Minseok honestly blushed at the action, as well as embarrassed for his loudness and lewdness. It had been such a long time since someone gave him a blowjob as mindboggling as this person had given him. The fingers were familiar to him; the kisses as well. Their touches were all too familiar to him.

He slowly fluttered his eyes open as he tried to catch his breath. A mop of light brown hair greeted his hazy stare. Minseok’s breath suddenly hitched at the familiar hair color. He bit his lower lip, anxious and a little confused. His heart had started to beat frantically inside his chest.

_‘Is this a dream?’ _He wondered to himself as he scrunched up his face in deep thought. The person clung onto him and was breathing heavily._ ‘Is it really him?’_

Minseok reached out for that person, uncertain and honestly a tad scared. There was an odd desire inside of him that wanted to touch their hair. His fingers tangled themselves on their locks, gently sifting through the soft and long light brown locks. He strangely felt a sense of calmness settle over him.

_‘Am I dreaming? Is this really happening?’_

The person froze at his actions but soon relaxed. They snuggled onto his stomach and hugged him tight. He heard them release a heavy sigh. “Please, forget everything,” he faintly heard the person mumble. Minseok furrowed his eyebrows and stared confusedly at the messy light brown locks. “Forget?” he repeated their words. The person nodded their head. “Just forget everything. Please,” they told him. Well, more like pleaded.

His heart then broke into a million pieces. The person’s voice was so broken, so vulnerable, it pricked his heart painfully. Minseok gulped down the lump on his throat. He hugged the person’s head and stroked their hair gingerly. He could feel the person was suffering. He could certainly feel they were in pain. “I’m sorry,” was all that he could say. “I’m sorry,” he repeated.

There was a tremendous pain in his chest. Minseok oddly felt responsible for the person’s agony. He felt miserable, and utterly useless. He knew he couldn’t soothe their pain away. There was honestly nothing he could do to stop their suffering. It hurt his pride but it hurt his heart more.

When he heard them stifle a sob, his entire world shattered. The person couldn’t even cry openly because of him. He hugged them closer and tighter. “I’m sorry,” he repeated his words again. “I’m really sorry,” he mumbled as a tear finally trailed down his cheek.

Tears endlessly escaped from him and his lips trembled uncontrollably. His heart honestly couldn’t take it. The person was in pain because of him – he could feel it from his guts. It was all because of him.

His mind was still a little hazy. He wasn’t sure if what was happening was real or was only a dream but the pain his heart was feeling tremendously felt real. Minseok hugged them closely and whispered his apologies over and over. He knew his words wouldn’t suffice yet he still tried to appease them.

He apologized endlessly until the darkness had consumed him.

As sleep took over him, the person finally looked up at him and smiled sadly at him.

“It’s not your fault,” he softly told Minseok. “It’s my fault for falling in love with you.”

**

Minseok woke up feeling groggy and terribly drained. His body felt weak and heavy with soreness. His head was throbbing painfully as well, like holes were being drilled into his skull. He groaned loudly as he tried to soothe his agonizing headache. “God! How much did I drink last night?” he grumbled to himself as he massaged his temples.

The doctor honestly couldn’t remember much what had happened from last night. His last memories were of him singing a duet with Baekhyun and more beer being sloshed down his throat. He somehow remembered slugging a few bomb drinks here and there too. He couldn’t help the shiver that ran down his spine at the thought of the numerous bomb drinks he might have consumed. “I’m never drinking with them ever again,” he said to himself as he resignedly shook his head.

Nausea suddenly hit him. He immediately regretted his movements. He then slowly sat up, endless curses and groans spewing from his mouth. His movements were slow, careful, and extremely calculative. Minseok was not fond of throwing up to be quite honest so he did his best not to get nauseous again.

_‘I’d rather have a hellish headache than chunking out the contents of my stomach so early in the morning!’_

His face suddenly scrunched up in confusion. “What time is it anyway?” he sleepily mumbled. He blindly reached out for him phone which was thankfully placed at his bedside table. He opened the tiny gadget and checked for the time. His eyes widened remarkably as he saw it was already past noon. “Sh*t!” he cursed out loud. He was about to stand up and dash out towards the bathroom when he realized what day it was. Minseok released a relieved sigh. It was his day-off today. _‘Thank God!’_ He couldn’t help but chuckle at his silliness.

“Hyung! Are you awake yet?” he then heard his younger brother scream from outside his door. Minseok’s face darkened and annoyingly scowled. Compared to his silent personality, his brother was the complete opposite of him. Kim Jongdae was a loud person – extremely and obnoxiously loud to be quite honest. “Hyung!!!!!!” the Younger Kim screamed again as he entered the doctor’s room like it was his. His eyes instantly squinted and glared darkly at his brother. “I’m awake for freaking sakes Jongdae!” he couldn’t help but scream back. “You don’t need to scream for murder! I’m not f*cking deaf!”

His brother merely laughed at his annoyance. “Good! I’m already starving, hyung!” Jongdae told him with his signature kitten smile. Minseok simply raised an eyebrow, his face indifferent and blank. Jongdae clicked his tongue at the older. “Aww~” the younger drawled out. “Don’t be like that hyung! I was waiting for you to wake up because I wanted to eat with you. We haven’t eaten together for days so I’ve been waiting for you to wake up for hours!” he dramatically sighed.

The older exasperatedly rolled his eyes. His brother’s dramatization reminded him of his hoobae. _‘Well, they’re best friends after all. Birds of the same feather flock together,’_ he grumpily mused. He couldn’t help but snigger at his thoughts.

“Hyung! Come on! Come on!” Jongdae whined as he tried to pull the other up from his bed. The elder clicked his tongue and swatted his brother’s hands away. He slowly stood up from his bed and stared condemningly at the other. “Just keep your voice low, you kitten troll. You’re too loud even for your own good,” he chided the other. Jongda could help but snort at his words. “Says the guy who couldn’t even control his screams at night,” the younger groused. Minseok stared at him, dazedly blinking a few times. “What?” he asked, a little confused. The younger Kim simply shook his head and waved his hands. “Nothing hyung!” he told him. “I’m just hungry, that’s all!” he added with a wide smile.

The two brothers then walked out of Minseok’s room and into the dining room. The elder sat on his seat and blankly stared at the food in front of him. “We have a guest?” he asked his brother as he pointed towards the extra set in their table. Jongdae raised an eyebrow at him. “You don’t remember hyung?” the younger countered. Minseok frowned and slowly shook his head. “What didn’t I remember?” he prodded. He tried to remember the events from last night but he was too drunk to come up with any decent memory. He wasn’t even sure if the things that happened to him were real or merely his fantasy to be quite honest. Minseok was suddenly anxious and uneasy of the things he couldn’t recall from last night. He gulped nervously and stared expectantly at his brother.

“You didn’t exactly come home alone hyung…” his brother drawled out. Minseok’s eyebrows shot up in surprise as his eyes widened remarkably. “I brought someone home?” he gasped.

He bit his lower lip and searched his memories. _‘Was I that drunk that I took someone home with me?’_ he wondered with knotted brows. He had never brought any of his nightly endeavors in their apartment before. He made it a point to never – not even once – to bring his one-night stands home. It was against his policy to do so.

His voice wasn’t above a whisper but Jongdae still heard him. “Nope. You didn’t,” the younger quickly answered. Minseok’s released a relieved sigh but uneasiness still overwhelmed him. “He was the one who brought you home,” he explained.

A mop of light brown locks then suddenly popped in Minseok’s mind. His heart started pounding in his chest. “Who is he?” he cautiously prodded. “Who brought me home, Jongdae?”

The hair color was familiar to Minseok – all too familiar to be exact. Was it the person in his dream? Or was it _that person_? The doctor gulped nervously as he tried to recall the events from last night again.

Without noticing it, a figure suddenly came out of the bathroom. They flashed a smile at Jongdae and slowly walked towards the table. The younger Kim tried to hide his growing smirk from his brother. He watched silently as the person slowly came to them, expectation building up inside of him.

“I did, hyung,” they finally said when they were close enough to the two brother. “I was the one who brought you home,” the person stated.

Minseok immediately turned to the voice, recognizing them instantly. His face instantly flushed when he met their gaze. His mouth hung agape and his eyes widened into large discs. His mind was suddenly cleared up and his hungover was immediately washed away. All of the grogginess and sleep inside of him was instantly wiped out because of the person smiling rather cheekily at him.

Byun Baekhyun was standing in front of him, only a towel covering his lower regions and obviously topless. His hair was dripping wet and his body emitted some sort of steam.

_‘He just got out of the shower?’_ Minseok noted as his Adam’s apple bobbed up and down. The doctor felt his throat was dry. He was suddenly parched.

His eyes dazedly followed a drop of water trail down from the younger’s face down his neck, then his chest, then his stomach, and then disappearing into the towel. His hands twitched. There was this sudden urge to rip off the wretched towel off his hoobae’s waist but Minseok restrained himself. He quickly shook his head to get rid of his indecent thoughts.

The older doctor then looked up and met his junior’s twinkling eyes. “B-Byun Baekhyun,” he stuttered. Minseok felt a tad uncomfortable and stiff. The younger slightly smirked at him. “Good morning sunbae!” he greeted him. He sat beside Minseok and grabbed for a toast. He took one bite and then smiled. “Looks like you’re okay now,” he told the elder as he stared closely at the closer. Minseok fidgeted a bit in his seat. “You were really out of it last night you know, sunbae! I didn’t even peg you as a strong drinker. You consumed like half of the alcohol we ordered!” the younger said with a chuckle.

Minseok wasn’t paying much attention to his words though. He had noticed his hoobae’s hair, a frown instantly adorning his face. “You dyed your hair,” slipped from his mouth. Baekhyun stared at him, his face a little guarded and indifferent. The younger looked away and scratched the back of his neck. “Ah, yeah,” he awkwardly chuckled. “I was just getting bored with it you know so I decided to dye it,” he said with a shrug of his shoulders. The older reached out and sifted his fingers onto his hoobae’s now blonde locks. “I liked it more when it was light brown,” he inaudibly mumbled.

Baekhyun’s breath hitched but Minseok didn’t put much thought into it. His mind was suddenly replaying his dream from last night. Light brown locks and a broken voice – it painfully tugged his heartstrings as he tried to recall that person’s face. _‘His hair was like Baekhyun’s… but was it him? Was that person Baekhyun?’_ Minseok wondered as he stroked the younger’s hair. He knew he saw that person’s face but his vision was blurry back then. _‘If it was really him, then what was it that he wanted me forget?’ _he pondered._ ‘And why did it hurt him so much?’ _His face scrunched up as he thought more and more deeply about his dream.

_‘Was that person you, Byun Baekhyun? Or was it someone else?’_

“Ehem~” Jongdae suddenly cleared his throat loudly. Minseok was pulled out of his daze and immediately retracted his hand from Baekhyun’s hair. He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. He was a little surprised by his actions. _‘Why did I do that?’ _he asked himself.

Minseok was honestly questioning his sanity at the moment. Meanwhile Baekhyun simply remained silent in his seat. Jongdae raised a worried eyebrow at him but the latter quickly shook his head and smiled at him, assuring him. The younger Kim understandingly nodded his head. He then grabbed for a piece of toast and spread some jam on it.

“Are you staying over today, Baek?” he then asked, eyeing his best friend in front of him. Baekhyun slowly shook his head, his lips jutted into a pout. “I can’t, Dae,” he dejectedly answered as he slumped back on his seat. “Why?” the other probed.

The young doctor heavily sighed and slumped back on his chair. His cheerful mood was now gone and was immediately replaced with a somber one. “Hyung’s coming over today,” he tersely replied.

Minseok’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Hyung?” he couldn’t help but react. “You have a brother?” he curiously prodded. From the years he has known Byun Baekhyun, it was the first time his hoobae has mentioned of having a brother or a sibling for the matter. Well, in his presence anyway. _‘Jongdae must have known though,’_ he thought to himself.

Baekhyun bit his lower lip and nodded his head. “Yeah~” he drawled out. “I have one brother…” he answered, his eyes darting cautiously from him and then to Jongdae. “What’s his name? And what year was he born? Are we the same age? Or is he older?” Minseok probed.

He was fairly curious. He always thought his hoobae was an only child. The older doctor only knew a few things about Baekhyun – like the latter lived with his grandparents when they were in high school. He had never seen his parents or any other relatives. The younger has always been secretive about his personal life to be quite honest. Ever since Minseok has met him, Baekhyun has been tight-lipped about his family. Having the younger talk about his brother was already an accomplishment for him. He stared expectantly at his hoobae.

“Baekbom,” Baekhyun answered. “Hyung’s name is Baekbom and he was born on the year of the wood Ox – 1985,” was the curt reply.

The elder was too caught up on trying to get information from his hoobae that he missed the distressed stares Baekhyun was giving to his brother, Jongdae. He had failed to even notice the evident discomfort in the other’s voice. He was supposed to be observant but the one time he seriously needed to notice things; he was too blinded to see it.

Minseok had terribly failed. And Baekhyun was slowly crumbling in the inside – again.


	6. Odd Things

Minseok noticed something odd about himself lately. He wasn’t sick per se; there was nothing specifically hurting or aching inside of him. But there was definitely _something_ wrong about him and it tremendously boggled the young doctor.

It started when he decided to observe _that_ _person_. There was this incessant gnawing feeling at the back of his mind, telling him or somewhat warning him to be more cautious or at least to be more aware of something – to be more aware of _him_. He supposed it had something to do with him violating his policy – wherein he wouldn’t sleep with any of his colleagues; the young doctor needed to be cautious and hopefully be prepared for its consequences after all.

So without any second thoughts, Minseok decided to keep an eye on _that person._

The young doctor watched _him_ diligently, even from afar, and paid close attention to _his_ different behaviors and actions. Minseok carefully noted _that person_’s expressions, analyzing them bit by bit and etching them permanently into the depths of his memory. He was even paying attention to _his_ numerous mannerisms and strange quirks; a bit irrelevant but he needed to understand _that person_.

He needed to understand the way _his_ mind worked in order for Minseok to discern _his_ thoughts. The young doctor needed to, at least, predict _his _actions. He needed to get into _his_ head. He needed to read_him_ like an open book. Albeit the difficulty in doing so, Minseok desperately tried with all of his strength. He needed to understand _him_.

He honestly wanted to understand.

And that was when things suddenly became… different.

Every morning, when it was time for his usual rounds, Minseok would always sought out, look for, and carefully scan the rooms or the hallways. As if by instinct, the young doctor’s eyes would automatically search for the person with cherry blossom hair.

From ice blonde to a soft pink, _that person_ had dyed _his_ hair to an incredibly flashy color. Yet it suited _him_ extremely well. It was a bright and cheerful color – ‘_just like him,’ _the young doctor noted.

Minseok had never failed to find _that person_ in a tremendously crowded place, all thanks to _his_ flamboyant hair. Yet the doctor somehow felt even without _his_ impeccably colored locks, he’d still be able to find _him_. There was no proper explanation for it but he just knew, deep down inside of him, he’d still be able to spot _him_ amidst a massive sea of people.

The doctor just knew he would be able to find _him_ no matter what. It was strange mix of confidence and intuition to be quite honest.

And even from afar, he could clearly see _him _as if his eyes were telescopes. He would see _him_ sometimes with a patient and sometimes with some of their colleagues in the hospital, and always with a huge smile on _his_ face – that horrid rectangular smile Minseok tremendously hated.

It was strange in all honesty. He hated that smile and he knew _that person_ would always be wearing that annoying and cheeky grin on _his_ face yet Minseok would still scour the faces of crowd and look for_him_.

Even during his days off, Minseok would find himself looking for _him_.

When he’s walking around the neighborhood, exercising or running in the park, or just driving through the busy streets, the doctor would instinctively survey his surroundings, searching for that ridiculous mop of hair with a shade of pink. And whenever Minseok would find himself doing so, he could only curse under his breath and berate himself for his actions, disappointment filling in his heart.

Maybe he got so used of having _that person_ close by. Or maybe he had suddenly become aware of _his_ presence or lack thereof.

It could also be because Minseok had been observing _him_ for days that his brain had programmed the natural urge or habit of scouring out the crowd for that person’s face.

It was possible. It was a probable reason.

Looking for _him_ had just become a habit for Minseok.

And that was the first odd thing he noticed.

The next thing was a little ironic so to speak; if Minseok was completely honest with himself. And the young doctor deeply chastised himself for it.

_His_ gaze – Minseok was honestly longing for _that person’s_ gaze. There was just this strange urge, some sort of increasing desire slowly bubbling inside of him, wanting _his_ eyes to be on him.

He hated it in all honesty. He seriously hated the way _that person_ looked at him after they did it. There was this obvious glint, this mischievous and mysterious twinkle in his brown eyes that irked Minseok. The luster in _that person’s_ lovely orbs stirred an unknown sensation inside of him. It annoyed him. It frustrated him greatly. Yet at the same time, it also intrigued him. It captivated him deeply.

Minseok remembered the first time _that person_ stared at him so intently, so deeply. It was a long time ago, back when they were still young and pretty immature to understand complex things, but that moment was permanently etched into Minseok’s memories, safely hidden with his other precious memoirs.

That moment was something he wouldn’t allow to be forgotten to be quite honest.

It was a short performance, an impromptu piece wherein _he_ played the piano and sang a short song. They were alone in the auditorium; not a single soul in sight except for the two of them. Minseok was seated near the stage, hiding from everyone because he couldn’t take it anymore – he couldn’t pretend anymore. He was sobbing, bawling his eyes out because someone precious to him had suddenly left. He was pouring his heart out; letting all of the sadness and hurt inside of him loose. To say he was caught up with his overwhelming emotions would be an understatement. He was drowning in all honesty.

He didn’t know when _he _exactly arrived; the piano just started playing a lovely melody, followed by _his_ beautiful voice resonating throughout the entire hall.

Of course he froze in place; someone unexpectedly played the piano and sang after all. He was confused, infuriated, as well as embarrassed for getting caught in such a situation. Minseok was sure the stranger had heard him. He wasn’t subtle with his crying after all.

His head snapped towards the stage, hastily wiping off his tears, and his body immediately straightened up and went rigid. The sight before him, or rather the person, was quite a shock to the young Minseok. His eyes widened remarkably as his mouth hung agape in disbelief. He didn’t expect _him_ – he seriously didn’t expect for _that person_, of all people, to be there. They weren’t exactly the best of friends, or were they particularly close. But they were close enough to drop the formalities; although they hardly ever talked when they were left alone with each other. Therefore, their relationship was borderline awkward.

Yet a strange sense of calmness immediately settled inside of Minseok with seeing _that person_ playing on the stage. There was just something so serene, so peaceful, yet so heart wrenching, so emotional, he couldn’t help but feel amazed and spellbound. The song was sad and somewhat befitting of his situation. Minseok closed his eyes and listened to _his_ enchanting voice, letting the music wash away his pain.

When _that person_ hit the last notes, Minseok had found himself relaxed and light – as if the heavy weight on his shoulders have finally been removed. It seemed like he had cried all of the hurt he had felt as he listened to _his_ song.

He released a long and relieved sigh. He then slowly opened his eyes. His gaze immediately met _his_. He gulped the lump that had formed in his throat.

He tried to speak up, to say something or at least say his thanks but he couldn’t. His voice seemed to have disappeared as he dazedly stared back at the captivating brown orbs of _that person_. They were calculating, full of mystery, and filled with various emotions Minseok had failed to discern.

He honestly tried to utter a single word but his mouth just pathetically opened and closed as his tongue refused to cooperate with him. He was just too enraptured with _that person’s_ gaze. He was too confused. He was too curious. He was in too deep.

But Minseok was the first one to look away. He couldn’t handle the intensity of the staring battle anymore. When he looked back towards the stage though, _that person_ had already disappeared to God-knows-where, leaving Minseok even more confused with _his_ actions.

They never spoke of that incident in the auditorium – ever. It was as if the tense moment between them did not happen at all, as if it was only a fragment of Minseok’s imagination.

But it was real. Oh so real!

Ever since then, _that person_ would, from time to time, stare at him with the same intensity, the same mystery, and the same glint in his eyes. Minseok wouldn’t stare back though. He didn’t dare to do so.

He was tempted though – oh so tempted!

Maybe he had been in denial for all these year but right now, in this moment, in all honestly, Minseok was seriously craving for it. _His_ piercing gaze, _his_ relentless stare, _and his_ mesmerizing eyes, he was definitely longing for them. He was yearning for those damn brown eyes to look at him.

That was the second odd thing.

And the last yet certainly not the least he had noticed.

Frankly, Minseok never paid any attention to details before. He never gave the time of day to actually study other people’s body parts; unless it was related to sexual endeavors of course. It never mattered to him in all honestly. _‘They’re all the same anyway, right?’_ he thought to himself with a shake of his head. But now that he did, or rather that he had to, _that person’s_ hands had specifically caught his attention.

Beautiful – that was the only word Minseok could come up with, despite the vast vocabulary he had learned throughout the years, to describe _his_ hands.

They were slender, somehow fragile-looking too. Yet he knew – oh how much the young doctor definitely knew – _his _hands were extremely capable than compared to others. Clumsy at times but when the situation calls for it, the dainty hands would surely move with ease and confidence.

_‘His hands… his fingers were, in all honesty… beautiful beyond words. Even the mole in his left thumb... it’s cute,’_ Minseok mused, a small smirk playing on his lips.

Yet the doctor found _that person’s _hands to be extremely dangerous – they were tempting to be precise.

_‘Especially right now!’_ he mentally grumbled.

It was their hospital’s general meeting; Minseok was staring, well more like glaring, at _that person_ who was sitting across from him. _He_ was playing _his_ pen, twisting it and spinning it absentmindedly as _he_listened to some colleague’s update report. _He _was even biting _his _bottom lip! And it distracted Minseok tremendously.

_‘It’s just… the way he’s playing with his pen... it’s quite… he looks, well… sensual.’_

_He_ played with it, like the way one would play with one’s member. It wasn’t exactly sensual or perverted per se but the way _he_ did it somehow reminded Minseok of their little frolicking time in his office.

Minseok anxiously gulped as his eyes followed that person’s fingers still playing with his pen. He then tightly gripped the pen, raised it to his lips, and bit its tip. It definitely reminded Minseok of their time together.

_‘It’s as if he knows what he’s doing to me,’_ he thought with furrowed brows.

Realization then sunk in.

The doctor instantly looked up and met with _that person’s_ gaze. His eyes twitched in annoyance, with a mixture of embarrassment. _That person_ obviously knew what _he_ was doing to Minseok and it was fairly obvious _he_ was teasing him about it. Minseok pursed his lips and tried to calm down his nerves. The meeting was just halfway through after all. He couldn’t let that person distract him any longer, or remove his professional mask in the midst of the entire hospital staff. His pride wouldn’t allow _him_ to do so. Thus Minseok stood his ground. He looked away from _him_ and concentrated all of his strengths towards their director who was now talking about their next VIP athlete-patient. He tried to put on his most convincing poker face ever and paid attention to what his superior was saying.

“Minseok-ssi,” their director, Jung Yunho, called him, his kind eyes directly staring at him. “Yes, sir?” he immediately responded, his voice filled with respect for the elder.

Doctor Jung Yunho, K-University’s Sports Clinic’s director, was his role model. They had the same history – an ex-athlete, thanks to an injury, who couldn’t let go of their love for sports thus deciding to go on the path of medicine, specifically sports science, so they could help the injured warriors like them. The two had the same dream. And it was just Minseok’s luck he was hired in the same hospital with his idol. He desperately tried so hard not to fanboy so much in Doctor Jung’s presence to be honest. But the others knew about his admiration for him. They couldn’t tease him though – or else they’d be dead.

“I want you to assist with his treatment,” Director Jung told him. The elder had handed him a folder containing the information on the patient. Minseok sifted through the documents and nodded his head, accepting the assignment. _‘Assist?’_ he then wondered. It meant he wouldn’t be the head doctor in-charge of the patient. He then looked at their director, a little sheepish and embarrassed because he wasn’t really paying attention during the meeting. Minseok cleared his throat. Director Jung raised an eyebrow at him, silently telling him to continue. “I’m sorry sir but I didn’t catch who’s going to be the doctor in-charge of…” He glanced at the patient’s information and checked his name. “Oh Sehun’s treatment. May I know who I’d be assisting for this case?” he shyly asked the elder.

Director Jung merely smiled at him, his smile fond and patient. Minseok was his favorite junior to be quite honest. “The head doctor is…” he drawled out as his eyes looked away from him and then travelled towards the person he was asking about. Minseok followed his gaze. He instantly froze when he saw who his senior was looking at. Oh how much Minseok was praying it wasn’t _that person_! He desperately prayed to the heavens it wasn’t _him_. “Byun Baekhyun,” the elder doctor then stated.

Disbelief overwhelmed him. His eyes grew into large discs and his mouth slightly opened. “Byun Baekhyun?” he squeaked out, his gaze going back and forth from his senior and then to his junior. “I’ll be assisting Byun Baekhyun?” The elder nodded his head. “Yes, you’ll be assisting Baekhyun-ssi. This is his forte after all. I just want you to assist him to be more effective. You two are our aces after all,” he said with laugh.

Everyone in the room also laughed, except Minseok of course. His eyes met with Baekhyun’s and he couldn’t help but throw daggers at the younger.

Baekhyun merely smirked at him, victory clearly shining in his eyes. “I’m excited to work with you in this case, sunbae,” he smiled at him. “I seriously can’t wait for your _assistance_,” he stressed. “I know you’ll be of great help with whatever I’d ever need!” he finished with a huge smile.

An inaudible groan escaped Minseok’s lips. Of all people he has to work with, it had to be _that person._ It had to be Byun Baekhyun!

_His_ fingers were definitely dangerous but Minseok noticed something even more dangerous.

Byun Baekhyun had a talent with his mouth. He was incredibly sociable and very talkative. He was annoyingly loud too. Letting his mouth loose would be a bad idea, a very dangerous and life-threatening idea to be exact.

“Let’s work happily together, _hyung!_”

Extremely dangerous all right!


	7. Distractions

Preoccupied – that was he had answered his brother, Jongdae, when the latter had asked how he was feeling the other day. The younger Kim had noticed his agitation, or maybe frustration, despite the other’s attempt of concealing it. The older Kim had always prided himself as someone who could hide his feelings well but it seemed like his brother had finally learned to read him. Jongdae was concerned of course; it wasn’t everyday you’d get to see the great Kim Minseok extremely troubled and uneasy after all. He had asked the latter if there was anything wrong at work or if he was undergoing some sort of phase, he even offered the elder his services. (The younger Kim’s a psychiatrist by the way.) But Minseok, being his prideful self, merely shrugged it off as exhaustion. As much as he wanted his brother’s help, Minseok couldn’t simply admit to the younger the truth. He just couldn’t admit the _real_ reason why he was so preoccupied, so distracted these past couple of days. And it honestly hurt his ego.

Minseok has been spending a great amount of time with a seriously dynamic doctor recently. He wasn’t complaining – work ethic wise. Byun Baekhyun was a brilliant doctor, extremely talented in fact. He was one of the best in their hospital honestly. But there was just something about him, about Baekhyun, which made Minseok a tad... anxious.

_‘Well, we slept together once. Maybe that’s why,’_ Minseok tried to reason. He bit his lower lip, feeling slightly guilty. The doctor knew, deep down, sleeping together wasn’t the true reason.

He somehow feared Baekhyun. In all honesty, Byun Baekhyun frightens him and it confuses Minseok as to why. He had known the younger doctor for so long, roughly around ten years, yet Bakehyun was still a mystery to him. _‘A puzzle I had yet to solve,’_ he mentally noted. A sigh then escaped his lips. Minseok stared down at the glass in his hands. He lifted it up to his eye level and swirled the golden brown liquid. His mind wandered off, thinking of the days he had been with Baekhyun.

They had spent long hours together, discussing about the latest patient under their care.

Oh Sehun was his name. He was only a few years younger than Minseok. The doctor had met the athlete a few days after their general meeting. Fairly tall, lean in built, and somehow had a lisp. He was the star pitcher for The Galaxies. The baseball player was widely known. Minseok, who was not even a baseball fan, knew him. His pitches were one of the fastest in the league – they would swiftly pass through the hitter, invisible like the wind. As far as he knew, Oh Sehun was a player for their baseball national team in the Olympics. He was that good.

Regrettably, something had to happen.

His shoulder got badly injured. It wasn’t much of an accident but more of an accumulated amount of pressure had built-up on his shoulder which eventually led to his arms giving up on him during one their practice matches. Sehun couldn’t throw a single pitch. He couldn’t even lift his right arm when he wanted to. It was tragic in all honesty.

For a baseball player, especially a pitcher like Sehun, their arm’s the most important and most precious part of their body. If that certain body part fails to do what they needed it to do, the athlete would have to say goodbye to their career. Without it properly functioning, their sports life would cease to an end.

_‘Like what happened to me,’_ Minseok sullenly recalled. His left knee badly got injured during one of their soccer games in his last year of high school. It got dislocated and he needed a surgery in order for him to walk again. They even had to replace a part of his tibia (the long bone on one’s leg). Minseok recovered amazingly fast. He had walked, with the help of his crutches, only after a few months following his surgery. Sadly, he couldn’t play soccer like he used to. His knee wouldn’t be able to take on the pressure if he tried to play. Minseok downed his rum on the rocks, wincing as the strong alcohol sloshed down his throat. His last year of high school was his dark days. It was a memory the doctor would rather not remember. Another sigh escaped from him.

Sehun’s still a lucky kid though. His injury might be serious but it wasn’t as so much fatal to his career. If his surgery would go well – _‘of course it would!’_ Misneok mentally scoffed – he’d just have to undergo a couple of months of rehabilitation and then he could come back to pitching in no time. It’s a long process and a pretty frustrating one too, but at least he could still play the sport he’s so passionate about. Plus his doctors were one of the best in all of South Korea. His recuperation would surely be certain and successful.

“Lucky kid indeed,” Minseok bitterly grumbled.

Baekhyun’s face then popped inside his head. The doctor suddenly remembered the way the other’s eyes had lit up when they met Oh Sehun for the very first time. It was a protocol for the patient to undergo a whole body check-up in order for them to know how they’d proceed on the surgery. Minseok could recall that moment so clearly, so vividly.

They were waiting in one of their hospital’s meeting room. He and Baekhyun were silent; only the sound of Minseok’s pen tapping on the table could be heard. It was an unexpected long stretch of silence for the both of them. Even Baekhyun, who was usually so annoyingly talkative, had kept his mouth shut. That should have given Minseok enough of a reason to be wary.

When the baseball player finally arrived, Baekhyun had instantly stood up from his seat and sauntered towards the athlete. His eyes had lit up like Christmas lights to the elder. There was this certain sparkle, a semblance of familiarity and fondness in his brown orbs that Minseok couldn’t help but be curious about. An uncomfortable feeling had instantly settled at the pits of his stomach. His junior was gazing at some athlete with such intensity, _such affection_, that it greatly troubled Minseok.

Was Baekhyun a fan? A sasaeng of Oh Sehun maybe? He wasn’t sure. He didn’t peg his junior to be one of the fanatical types. Byun Baekhyun could come off as annoying and extremely nosy but he was far from obsessive and intrusive. “He’s just not like that,” Minseok softly mumbled as he shook his head. He then called for the bartender and asked for a refill of his drink.

The young doctor stifled a snort. He oddly felt contradicting. “Whose fault am I in this place anyway?” he scoffed as he took the drink the bartender had just given him. His eyes wandered across the place he currently was.

Minseok, already feeling out of character, had decided to visit a night club after his shift. He wasn’t much of a night club person, he preferred drinking in an exclusive kind of bar, but tonight was different. He needed different. He badly needed it.

Overdose – he read the huge blinking signage behind the DJ booth. He subtly chortled at how _unique_ the name was. The club was a famous place as far as he was aware of. The long line outside was already a telltale sign of its popularity. Minseok was lucky enough to enter without any reservations or whatsoever – courtesy of his brother Jongdae. (He was a regular, Minseok suspected.) And the inside... Well, it was filled also with people. The dance floor was packed with individuals who were dancing and grinding on each other. Minseok couldn’t help but grimace at how unhygienic it was to dance in the middle of such a crowded floor, feeling their body heat and sweat on you. He shuddered at the thought. He somehow felt suffocated just watching them.

He turned towards the bar and then to the booths surrounding the dance floor. It was also full. Many were with their group of friends, or maybe their co-workers, drinking their hearts out. It seemed to Minseok that they were all having a good time. They were laughing like hyenas and drinking like there was no tomorrow after all.

_‘Unlike me,’_ he internally sighed. He grabbed for his glass and then chugged it all one go.

“This is all Baekhyun’s fault,” he grumbled under his breath.

Ah, yes! The Byun to the Baek to the Hyun! Byun Baekhyun! Minseok’s ever infuriating and bothersome junior!

Baekhyun’s fluffy plum-coloured locks which used to be cherry blossom pink; Baekhyun’s crinkly eyes whenever he laughs or smiles; Baekhyun’s haughty smirk which makes Minseok want to smack his face to the ground; Baekhyun’s rosy cheeks whenever it’s cold; Baekhyun’s cute thumbs which has a mole on the left one; Baekhyun crinkling his button nose which reminds him of a puppy; Baekhyun’s nasty habit of biting his bottom lips which drives Minseok’s imagination wild; Baekhyun’s irritatingly adorable rectangular-shaped smile; Baekhyun’s melodious laughter which sends tingling sensations down his spine – Minseok’s mind was just so full of Byun Baekhyun, hecouldn’t help but feel greatly overwhelmed by them.

He told himself to be careful of the younger doctor, to be more wary of him and his actions, but he didn’t expect for himself to be too aware of the hyper yet endearing lad. Minseok wasn’t prepared to be feeling this way – too preoccupied, too distracted, and he cursed himself for being too careless.

“I should have been more careful,” he muttered under his brath. Minseok called for the bartender again and asked for a refill. The other simply nodded his head before heading off to tend to another customer. He released a long and heavy sigh. “This is too much,” he softly mumbled.

Minseok was about to drink his newly filled rum on the rocks when someone suddenly sat beside him and said, “Easy there! The night’s still young and you’re already on your – what fourth refill?” The doctor turned to his side and saw a guy – he wasn’t _that_ good-looking but he wasn’t ugly – grinning childishly at him.

_‘Oddly like Baekhyun,’_ he couldn’t stop himself from thinking. Minseok internally berated himself at the thought.

He was going to ignore the guy but then someone had approached them – or rather the latter. “Donghae-yah! I just left you for not more one minute and here you are, already flirting with someone else!” the newly arrived person harrumphed to the other. Minseok couldn’t help but raise an inquisitive brow as he stared at the said person. Donghae turned to his friend – Minseok assumed they _were_ friends but his gut instinct was telling him otherwise – and cutely pouted. He seriously reminded Minseok of his junior. He tried to push that away quickly. “But Hyukjae!” Donghae whined. “How can leave this little cutie alone?” he said as he unexpectedly latched himself onto Minseok’s arm. The young doctor, as well as Hyukjae, was not totally pleased with his words and actions. “This club is full of hungry wolves! Many have been staring at him – all lustful mind you – I just couldn’t let him be!” he dramatically exclaimed.

“But Hae-“ Hyukjae wasn’t able to finish his sentence as Donghae continued on with his ramblings. “They were all staring at you with hungry eyes,” he told Minseok, his eyes showing true worry. The doctor oddly felt touched by this stranger’s concern. “If it weren’t for Baekhyun’s warning, many would have approached you already,” he finished with a satisfied nod.

Misneok stilled at his junior’s name. He knew the name Baekhyun wasn’t common – and it may just be a coincidence Donghae’s friend was also named like his junior – but his heart had already started pounding inside his chest. He craned his neck and looked around. He squinted and tried to look for that mop of plum locks. _‘It can’t be,’_ he reassured himself. _‘It’s just a coincidence that’s all.’_

“Speak of the devil,” he heard Donghae mumble before the latter waved enthusiastically at someone from the dance floor. Two figures emerged from the extremely crowded expanse and walked towards them.

The young doctor honestly couldn’t believe his eyes. He swallowed the lump that had formed on his throat. He knew the two figures – he certainly knew them.

As the two came closer, one of them immediately met his shocked gaze. Minseok felt his whole body had gone frozen. The person then glared at him. Well, Minseok thought it wasn’t him he was glaring but rather they were glaring at Donghae – who was still clinging onto him like a koala bear.

“Baek, can you please tell Hae here to release this guy from his hold?” Hyukjae huffed when his junior was close enough to hear them from the banging loud music. Baekhyun, who was uncharacteristically styled like a bad boy (he looked extremely sexy with those black eyeliner, ripped jeans, and leather jacket in all honesty but Minseok wouldn’t admit out loud), turned to the person clutching his arms. “Donghae hyung~” he started, sounding exasperated. “Release Minseok sunbae or else Hyukjae hyung would seriously be mad at you,” he threatened.

“Your Minseok?” Donghae asked as he looked at the doctor in awe. “Hyung...” he heard Baekhyun lowly growl. “But Baekhyunnie!” the other then turned his attention to the younger. “What if those wolves would suddenly lunge at him? He’s as cute as bunny! I couldn’t let him be eaten by those vicious animals!” he exaggerated exclaimed.

Minseok felt his cheeks flush with their words. He met Baekhyun’s intense eyes before looking away.

“They wouldn’t, hyung,” he heard Baekhyun say. He hesitantly stared at his junior. “They wouldn’t even try,” the younger added.

He felt his heart constrict in his chest. His junior’s words seemed... possessive. It sent thrills down his spine. Minseok oddly felt pleased with Baekhyun’s tone.

His eyes then shifted towards the person with Baekhyun. He immediately met their gaze. “Doctor,” the other curtly nodded at him. “Sehun,” Minseok replied back.

“Oh! You know Sehunnie too!” Donghae said as he clapped his hands excitedly. “You should join us then!” he stated.

Minseok looked at Baekhyun. His junior looked a little displeased with Donghae’s offer. It somehow pissed off the doctor in all honesty. His eyes then travelled towards Sehun. The athlete seemed nonchalant about it like he wasn’t really interested or what if Minseok would join them or if he decided to strip down naked right there and then. He tried to look for Hyukjae but it seemed like the other had disappeared to God-knows-where.

Shrugging, he turned to Donghae and said something he knew he might or might not regret sooner or later. Minseok said, “Okay.”


	8. Stirring

A couple of hours have passed; beers were jugged down, jokes were funnily made, and unbelievable stories were told – despite his earlier reservations, Minseok was honestly having a good time. He felt giddy, and sublimely happy. His heart was filled with warmth. It hurt his ego to admit it, but the young doctor was seriously having the time of his life. He was socializing, he was fooling around, and the most shocking of all, Minseok was laughing – laughing his butt off as his stomach and cheeks start to ache to be exact. His eyes had started to water from all the laughing too. It was a good kind of surprise for the young doctor.

Minseok couldn’t exactly remember the last time he had laughed to the point of tears in fact. _‘Maybe sometime during my senior year in high school,’_ he mentally noted, nostalgia swirling at the pits of his stomach. High school was pretty memorable for Minseok. A sad smile ghosted his lips.

He looked around, a little dazed, at the odd bunch of people he was with. He felt unusually relaxed with the group. He somewhat felt he had known them for years – that he had been in their little circle from the very beginning. A strange sense of belongingness swelled inside his heart. He couldn’t help but feel grateful for their open-arms. He stared at them one by one, mulling over the things they had shared with him.

Lee Donghae, Lee Hyukjae, and Oh Sehun – they were Baekhyun’s friends, his hoobae’s comrades he had met during his days as an athlete. They were in the same team, representing their middle school in the leagues.

Lee Hyukjae, the oldest in their circle, was surprisingly kind and funny. His real personality was opposite to what he has showed to Minseok earlier. “Hae has a bad habit of attaching himself to strangers,” he shyly started to explain. “I was just worried because the last time he attached himself to someone, he was stalked by the guy. We even needed a restraining order for the guy to finally leave him alone,” he added with a cute pout. Hearing his explanation, Minseok couldn’t help but internally coo. The older was oddly warm. He reminded the young doctor of a monkey too with the way the elder moved which he vocalized to the group. It resulted to a fit of laughter and a collective agreement from the others. “Hyung’s a really cute monkey,” Baekhyun quipped as Hyukjae protested in his seat. It earned another round of laughter from the group.

The elder was remarkable though, admiring in fact for Minseok. Hyukjae was their designated hitter, the batter in their team. Minseok wasn’t familiar with baseball players when he was in high school but as Donghae proudly told him, Hyukjae was the best of the best. He even made it to the final roster for their National Team. Regrettably though, the latter wasn’t as passionate in the ball game as compared to dancing.

“It was my first love,” Hyukjae bashfully mumbled, his hand scratching the back of his neck. “I like baseball but I just couldn’t replace dancing,” he explained. “Dancing would always be my number 1,” he added, smiling widely.

Hyukjae established his very own dance academy, All Rise Silver, which produced skilled and extremely talented dancers in the industry. He even choreographed both locally and internationally, earning him the title as a world renowned choreographer. One of his notable projects was working with SM Entertainment’s beloved group, Super Junior. It was the turning point of his career according to the elder.

Then there was Lee Donghae, the extremely friendly and clingy yet endearing hyung of the group. He was the epitome of the sunbae for the young doctor but his characteristic wasn’t what Minseok had honestly expected.

He was the catcher, the master of many strategies and plays which lead to numerous victories for thier team. They won championship leagues year after year, dominating not only their district but also their region. His skills were of the cream of the top; it was of a professional level despite his young age, effective, efficient, and beyond comparison. “He’s a devil in disguise,” Hyukjae offhandedly commented as he continued to babble things about the other. But Minseok could see the hint of seriousness in the elder’s voice.

Donghae, with his cute smile and dimples, was a total contrast to the devious and mischievous sparkle in his eyes. He was calculating yet he could come off as innocent and he was always used it to his advantage; it was both scary and admirable to the young doctor.

The elder somehow reminded him of his hoobae, Baekhyun, and the thought gave him chills down his spine. Minseok somehow felt the elder could see right through him or was observing him like how his hoobae does every time he stares at him – _‘but Baekhyun’s gaze is still different,’_ he then thoughtfully added, slightly pursing his lips.

“Life had to happen though,” Donghae then shared. His eyes were downcast, and Minseok could see the elder’s mood visibly deflate. Hyukjae gave him a comforting pat on the back to which the latter returned with a grateful smile. “As much as I wanted to continue playing, my parents were hardly making any money from our bakery. Our customers started buying from those fancy cafes and bakeries. We barely had enough for supplies and food – I needed to step up as their son.”

”I started helping out in the bakery, learning the basics from my dad,” he said, a small smile playing on his lips. “I never knew baking was that challenging. It thought you just have to mix things together and put it in the oven and then viola~ you have bread, or cake, or whatever.” His eyes were now sparkling. “But it took me exactly two months to bake a perfect loaf of bread!” Donghae was now smiling, wide and proud. “I was elated to get the seal of approval of my father. I jumped up and down – you’d thought my team had won the championship league, but it wasn’t. It was entirely differently but somewhat similar.”

Donghae was beaming, his eyes dazzling despite the club’s dark lightings. “Now our bakery had grown and we’re opening our fifth branch in Busan very soon,” he announced, pride swelling.

Everyone clapped, obviously happy for the elder. Congratulations were also given.

As the excitement somewhat died down, the attention was then focused on their maknae, Oh Sehun. The youngest fidgeted in his seat, suddenly embarrassed with the sudden interest in him. “My story’s not that noteworthy,” he shyly stuttered. But Byun Baekhyun begged to differ. With a disapproving shake of his head, he started telling Sehun’s story to Minseok.

Oh Sehun was apparently his junior from primary school until middle school. They were, in fact, neighbours before Baekhyun had to move to his grandmother’s for high school. They were childhood friends.

It surprised Minseok, to have finally known someone from his hoobae’s past before he came to Seoul, before he came into their lives. _‘Maybe that’s why they looked so close,’_ he thought, eyeing the two beside him. His heart squeezed a little.

“Sehun had always admired Baekhyun,” Donghae considerately added. “I remember when he was a first year in middle school, he’d train even after practice so he could beat Baekhyun as the pitcher,” he recalled with an amused smile, his tone somewhat teasing. Sehun inaudibly groaned as he covered his face with his hands, “That’s not the only thing I remember!” Hyukjae then excitedly butted in. “When he was smaller, he’d always follow Baekhyun and ask him how to throw a ball,” he added.

Baekhyun laughed at the memory, poking the youngest’s cheeks fondly. “I couldn’t help but give in to his request,” he giggled. The sound sent Minseok’s mind into a frenzy. “Sehunnie was just too cute to say no to,” he explained.

His words elicited laughter from the group – sans Sehun of course. The youngest just glared at his hyungs for teasing him. Minseok didn’t felt like laughing though but he still did. He somewhat felt a tad uncomfortable with Baekhyun and Sehun’s closeness. He grabbed for a beer and drank a considerable amount. He hoped the alcohol would wash away the bitterness currently on his taste buds.

Sadly it didn’t.

“I thought Sehun liked Baekhyun back then,” Donghae then expressed. His eyes travelled from Sehun to Baekhyun, gaze clearly questioning. Minseok sat frozen, surprised and unprepared for the other’s words. He stared, wide-eyed at his hoobae and Oh Sehun, his mind racing with lots of incoherent thoughts.

The youngest coughed awkwardly and timidly grabbed for a glass of beer and swirled it around, his gaze avoiding everyone’s curious eyes. “I did,” he quietly mumbled. “I did like hyung.”

His voice was small, feeble, and weak, but everyone had oddly heard it – especially Minseok.

He sat frozen in his seat, shell-shocked and dumbstruck with the revelation. His heart had started pounding excessively inside his chest. His eyes turned to his hoobae, he was smiling sadly at Sehun. Baekhyun had grabbed the youngest’s hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. Minseok somewhat heard the other whisper, “thank you for liking me.”

Everyone settled with light chatter as awkwardness slowly rose in the air. Meanwhile Minseok had his mind occupied by his hoobae yet again. He was feeling uneasy, and he hated feeling uneasy. And Byun Baekhyun always made him uneasy.

He grabbed for another drink and gulped it down in one go, seriously hoping for his uneasiness to disappear.

It didn’t.

**

The awkwardness somehow disappeared and the topic of his hoobae’s athletic life was given light, courtesy of the ever mischievous Lee Donghae of course.

Unbelievably and unbeknownst to Minseok, Baekhyun was a baseball prodigy during his younger years. He even competed in the National Games when he was in primary and middle school and was one of the promising pitchers in their district. He regrettably quit in the middle of high school though, with no particular reasons to boot.

“How I failed to remember that strange fact about you being a baseball player is beyond me,” he breathed, staring sceptically at the younger doctor. Honestly, Minseok never really heard his junior’s amazing athletic life – even from Jongdae, his very own brother, who was Baekhyun’s one and only best friend, had never mentioned anything about Baekhyun and baseball in one sentence the entire time they had known the other. His brain couldn’t even come up with any memory of his hoobae in the baseball field or training. Minseok oddly felt betrayed by this. He was somewhat frustrated too.

Baekhyun smiled at him and merely answered, “You always failed to remember things about me, hyung.”

His hoobae’s words didn’t sit well with Minseok in all honesty. It struck a thorn in his heart. It somehow hurt.

“How did you two meet by the way?” Donghae curiously asked. “Baekhyun never mentioned how you two met,” he added.

Minseok scrunched up his face as he tried to remember how they exactly met. “He was my brother’s classmate in high school,” he said after a while of thinking. “They were best friends so I eventually got to meet him after a few months.”

The others merely nodded their heads. Donghae somehow looked disappointed.

“I got to know you before then, sunbae,” Baekhyun then interrupted.

Everyone, including Minseok, stared at him in surprise. “Really?” Minseok wondered. “Where? When?”

Baekhyun met his curious gaze, smiling slightly. “It was during summer,” he started. “It was during the soccer team’s training camp at the beach.” Minseok’s lips formed an ‘O’ as the memory came into mind. “So it was before you entered high school?” he inquired. His hoobae nodded in confirmation.

“I saw you training by yourself, dribbling and all, even after the coach ended your training for the day,” Baekhyun continued. “I was there for baseball camp and I was jogging, just exercising and relieving my muscles when I saw you at the pitch doing your own stuff. You were so concentrated with your training you didn’t notice anything in your surroundings at all. You didn’t even notice it was getting dark and your manager had to call you for dinner one time,” he recalled with a hearty laugh.

“I was honestly moved by your dedication,” Baekhyun told him, his dark brown eyes gazing seriously at his cat-like eyes. “You’re a really passionate person and I seriously admired you for it hyung,” he sincerely added. “Despite getting injured and not being able to play anymore, you still got back on your feet and moved on. You still persevered. You pushed yourself, your boundaries, and look at where you are now?” His hoobae offered him a soft smile. “You’re here, standing in front of us, stronger and much more passionate than ever.”

Minseok nervously gulped hearing his hoobae’s words; his heart was hammering wildly in his chest. He was having an emotional and mental breakdown some sort.

They were gazing at each other, their surrounding somehow fading. No sound could be heard, no other person could be seen – only the two of them were present at the moment. Baekhyun’s eyes were unrelenting; dark orbs seemingly like galaxies sucking Minseok deeper and deeper as he dazedly stared back. He felt like his heart would give up beating any moment now. He was feeling so many things at the moment – overwhelming emotions he’s too afraid to identify.

He was the first one to look away. His heart, as well as his sanity, couldn’t take it anymore.”

_‘I’m getting in too deep...’_


	9. Take Me

Minseok stared at his reflection in the mirror, the sound of flowing water distracting his extremely cluttered thoughts. Images from last night flashed across his mind, attacking him like waves of a monster tsunami. Beautiful hands, cherry blossom pink hair, and soft vicious lips – the memories were unrelenting and couldn’t be pushed down no matter how hard the young doctor tried. His heart hammered excessively inside his chest.

He stared at his reflection again. Minseok couldn’t help but cringe at the sight in front of him. He seriously looked terrible. His face looked awful with his bloodshot eyes and red-chapped lips. Even his hair was a complete mess – a bird’s nest of some sort. His dark brown locks sticking up all over the place.

The young doctor was an absolute wreck. He splashed some water onto his face, relishing on its coldness. He was trying to sober up, trying to gather himself and his thoughts. A long and deep sigh escaped his lips. He knew he couldn’t escape from the reality he was facing at the moment.

He nervously bit his already bruised lips as he studied himself in the bathroom’s mirror again.

His eyes travelled towards his exposed skin. He was wearing a large loose sleeveless shirt – obviously not his; splotches of violet, blue, and green greeted his curious gaze. He raised his hand and feathered gentle touches over the numerous love bites. One certain hickey caught his attention. He squinted. It was just right above his collarbone, the skin where his neck meets his shoulder – it was right in his pulse. He pressed on the bite, a little harder compared to before. He hissed in pain, the little mark was horridly turning into an awful bruise already.

Minseok grumbled under his breath. _‘It would take a lot of effort to cover this up,’_ he thought, feeling slightly peeved.

His mind then reminisced how it was put there.

Ruthless and honestly possessive, that was how the other had marked him. Their bites seriously hurt yet at the same time they had aroused Minseok to his very core. The way they sucked and bit his skin sent shockwaves of pleasure all throughout his body. Even the way their eyes had roamed over his naked body was merciless – it was as if the young doctor was being devoured with their vicious eyes alone. He couldn’t help but shudder at the memory.

Lust filled his every sense last night, even up to now in all honesty – like a small fire, a kindling just waiting to grow.

He then slowly turned around, his eyes studying the shower and the bathtub critically. Minseok knew he needed to shower. His body felt so sticky and uncomfortable, he seriously needed to bathe as soon as possible. But his body ached all over. His arms and legs were too sore – every muscle in his body couldn’t adhere to his wishes at the moment.

Everything was just too tense and too stiff for him to move at all. It took him a great amount of strength and patience to even walk towards the bathroom from the extremely comfortable bed he had woken up to.

Minseok mentally cursed himself for getting too carried away. He knew he should have at least taken control or something like that. But he didn’t. He just let the other do everything they wanted and more – he honestly felt like a ragged doll last night.

He shook his head gloomily.

Oddly enough, he didn’t regret his decision. He honestly enjoyed every bit of it.

The doctor then noticed some candles by the bathtub and some interesting bath salts on the shelf. His lips twitched upward. He honestly couldn’t help but feel amused. He should have expected for these things to be available in his bathroom but he had failed to have thought of it. _‘Like I always do,’_ he grimly thought.

With a soft chuckle, Minseok made his way towards the bathtub and started to fill it with warm water. He lit the candles and soon a refreshing scent of lavender greeted his nose. He could feel his whole body already relaxing.

He slowly shrugged off his clothes and put it in the laundry basket.

When the bathtub was finally filled, he put in some considerable amount of bath salt then ever so carefully lowered his aching body.

A groan escaped his lips. The water was just warm enough to soothe his aching muscles meanwhile the candles helped in calming his troubled mind. A smile was finally plastered on his face.

Minseok made his self more comfortable. He then closed his eyes, finally allowing the memories from last night invade him.

He thought of his hoobae, his immensely energetic and passionate junior. He couldn’t help but chuckle honestly.

“Byun Baekhyun, you devil,” he mumbled, his tone warm and extremely fond.

**

The cool night breeze softly caressed Minseok’s cheeks. It was fairly chilly outside and the jacket he had brought was fairly thin but he paid it no mind. His thoughts were busy of other things – a much more distracting and dangerous thing, or rather, person.

He anxiously bit his bottom lip as his eyes subtly glanced at the person beside him. They were walking side by side, their steps peculiarly in-sync and their hands faintly touching. The gentle brushing of their fingers made his heart flutter uncontrollably in his chest. Minseok honestly felt perplexed at this feeling.

_‘Why did I tell him to take me home?’_ he berated himself, mentally slapping his cheeks. _‘I know I had a lot to drink but I’m not that drunk,’_ he internally grumbled. _‘Why did I have to ask him?’_

But Minseok knew the answer – he perfectly knew why he asked the other. He definitely and certainly knew.

Earlier as their laughter turned into lulling chatters, their lively group had decided it was finally time for them to go home. They had consumed a great amount of alcohol and had shared almost every tidbit of their lives to Minseok, except for Baekhyun, as usual, to the doctor’s dismay – it was about time to finally say their farewell when the clock stroke after midnight. Some of them had work in the morning too, besides for the two doctors, so the decision to turn in was of the majority.

As they stood up from their seats, Minseok’s gaze met with Baekhyun’s. The younger’s unrelenting eyes captivated him. His dark orbs swirling with so much intensity sent electrifying shivers down Minseok’s spine. He couldn’t look away – or more fittingly so, he didn’t want to.

Emotions of various intensities and passion then assaulted his distracted mind. The restlessness in his nerves was reverberating all throughout his body. His stomach was churning, flipping uncontrollably and annoyingly for him to fathom. Even his heartbeat had started thumping excessively – adrenaline rushing through his veins. He oddly felt like he was running a marathon.

Minseok nervously gulped.

There was a sense of realization, some sort of awakening, the moment he had met his hoobae’s eyes. It was a slow one, a gradual and lethargic kind of awareness.

He needed Baekhyun – physically of course. He needed the younger’s warmth; his lips, his touches, his passion, his vigour – Minseok helplessly and cravingly needed all of Byun Baekhyun. And it was finally time to admit it.

As the younger silently drove out of the club’s parking lot and the elder riding shotgun, Minseok took a deep breath before finally, daringly, uttering the words he had wanted to say for so long.

“Let’s go to your place, Baekhyun.”

**

He could feel his junior’s curious gaze on him, studying and predicting his every move, but he simply ignored it. He knew it was his idea to come here but he was still trying to grasp the reality of the situation – or rather, he was still trying to gather up enough courage to finally meet with his hoobae’s unrelenting gaze. Minseok nervously gulped as his eyes travelled across the expanse of his junior’s home.

It was a simple studio type apartment – small yet not too closed off and suffocating. It’s not your typical bachelor pad filled with monochrome colours, Baekhyun’s was filled with blue and light and warmth. Even though it was already past midnight, Minseok could already feel the sun’s rays shining through the white blinds on the windows. The apartment fitted his hoobae extremely well. It suited his personality to the nail. The doctor couldn’t help but faintly smile.

He heard Baekhyun’s footsteps, walking towards the kitchen he supposed. “Do you want anything to drink, sunbae?” the other asked, the door to the refrigerator opening. Minseok gingerly took off his jacket and finally, with a silent ‘fighting’ escaping his lips, turned to his junior.

The younger doctor was looking at him as he had expected. His orbs were curious, critical, and seriously calculating. He was trying to read Minseok, assessing what the elder’s next move would be. There was a hint of silent expectation but Minseok tried not to focus on them too much. He gulped the lump that had formed in his throat and slowly nodded his head, finally answering his hoobae’s earlier question.

“Is water okay? Or do you want anything else?” the younger inquired. “I don’t have anything decent to eat since I usually eat out,” he added, slightly embarrassed. He threw the elder a bashful smile. “Water is fine,” Minseok managed to squeak out despite his excessively beating heart, shaking his head at his junior’s words.

Finally gathering himself, Minseok trudged towards the kitchen and sat in one of the chairs at the table. Baekhyun sat opposite of him, and passed him a glass of cold water. Minseok gladly took it, drinking the liquid in one smooth gulp.

The younger’s gaze was intently on him. The doctor felt he needed another glass but once his eyes accidentally met with the other, all he could think about was Baekhyun attacking him with his sinful lips and taking him right there in his kitchen. Minseok hasn’t tried that out before and the thought of his junior f*cking him on a table was something he oddly wanted to do.

His lewd imagination made him uncomfortable under Baekhyun’s intense gaze. He fidgeted in his seat and looked away from the other, distracting himself with the skyline of Seoul at night.

Minseok stayed silent, so did Baekhyun. The two mulled over unnecessary thoughts, both too scared to address the situation at hand.

**

“Why are you here, sunbae?” Baekhyun finally asked after a while of silence.

Minseok stiffened at the question. He knew the younger would confront him sooner or later.

He nervously gulped as he reluctantly met with his hoobae’s gaze. “I-“ He tried to answer but he couldn’t. Minseok was never good with words despite his job requiring him to do so – he sucked at explaining himself in all honesty. He cleared his throat.

“Do you want me to f*ck you, _hyung_?” Baekhyun asked him, his eyes darkening. Minseok’s heart started hammering inside his chest, his throat becomnig a tad parched. “Do you want me to shove my d*ck up your a*s while you’re perched on the table?” he continued. The imagery made Minseok shiver. Baekhyun stood up from his seat and went behind Minseok, his hands strongly on the elder. “Or do you want me to f*ck your mouth and lustfully moan out your name?” His breath tickled Minseok. The elder felt his member twitch at Baekhyun’s words.

Baekhyun massaged his shoulders, his touches sensual and arousing. It earned a low groan from Minseok.

“All you need to do is tell me _hyung**,**_” he whispered. “Just tell me what you want me to do,” he said, licking the shell of Minseok’s ear.

“Take me,” the elder muttered breathlessly. “Take me right now,” he breathed.

Baekhyun then grabbed his face, making the elder face him. He squinted, his eyes twinkling with mischief. “Say it again _hyung_,” he ordered. “Say it one more time.”

Minseok hated how confident Byun Baekhyun was at the moment. He hated how the younger knew how to push his buttons. He hated how he could get whatever he wanted to easily. Also, he hated how he couldn’t resist the urge to submit to the younger’s every wishes. Minseok hated how Baekhyun had the power him – he extremely and furiously hated it.

Yet he liked it at the same time.

He liked the dominant Byun Baekhyun. He freaking loved it.

“Take me. Byun Baekhyun,” he growled.

Without words, Baekhyun attacked his mouth. Tongues fighting and teeth crashing – their kisses were rough and extremely needy, passionate, arousing. Minseok’s lips were sucked, bit, and licked endlessly. He couldn’t even keep up with its intensity but he just continued on, kissing back and biting back as much as possible. His hands tugged on Baekhyun’s hair, pulling them, grabbing them with force as they kissed more and more.

He then felt his back meeting something soft, realizing the younger had moved them to his bed. He couldn’t help but smile into their kiss.

The younger then started kissing down his neck, his fast hands unbuttoning his shirt. Minseok quickly took the clothing off and was about to do the same thing to Baekhyun but the latter shook his head, his lips turning into a smirk. “I want to see you naked first,” he said before returning on attacking Minseok’s exposed skin.

He soon felt his jeans being pulled down so he lifted up his lips, casually brushing their hard-on. A moan escaped both of their lips. He was instantly pushed down by Baekhyun, forcefully.

“Don’t be impatient, _hyung_,” the younger growled. “I think I need to teach you lesson.”

Baekhyun stripped him off of his boxers, exposing his already hard member, pre-cum leaking from the tip. The younger smirked evilly down at him, his eyes leisurely staring at his exposed self as if remembering every mark on his body. He was basically eye-raping the elder. His hooded gaze sent jolts of pleasure to Minseok. His member twitched in need, now standing in full. The smirk on the younger’s face visibly grew.

“You’re too needy, _hyung,_” he whispered into Minseok’s ear, his voice seriously seductive.

The younger pecked his lips before kissing down to his neck, stopping on his collarbone and sucking on the soft skin. He gently swiped his tongue over the bruising skin before doing the same thing to another part of the elder’s chest. The abuse repeated over and over, making Minseok squirm under him, mewling helplessly and moaning endlessly.

Baekhyun then licked his nipple, slightly biting on the small bulb. He then felt the younger’s hand slowly and gently caressing his inner thighs, the fingers magically working their way upwards. The unhurried movements were making Minseok crazy with lust and need.

As Baekhyun’s mouth peppered his stomach with wet and sloppy kisses, fingers then teased his butthole, dipping inside and then going out. The younger was obviously badgering him – teaching him a lesson as he had said earlier. As one finger dipped further into the hole, Minseok tried to suck it more, burying the finger more. He heard the younger ‘tsk’ at his impatience.

“Needy, needy! _Hyung_ is needy,” Baekhyun taunted. “I know the perfect lesson for you _hyung.”_

Minseok could see the mischievous glint in the younger’s eyes.

The latter then, with great speed, took off his clothes, exposing his already pulsating member. The elder gulped in want, in need, in lust. He let his eyes soak in the nakedness of his junior in front of him. Byun Baekhyun was in his full naked glory, unlike before, and it took Minseok a great amount of restraint not to moan out loud at the beauty before him.

Baekhyun grabbed for his thighs and spread them widely apart, exposing his butthole. “No preparations needed for you, _hyung. _I’ll let my d*ck open you up real good,” he said.

The elder didn’t understand his words but when he felt something hard and big enter him, he instantly knew what kind of lesson the other had planned for him. Minseok screamed out in both pain and pleasure, taking in Baekhyun’s thick member deeper into him.

The younger pulled out his member fully to the rim and rammed back with much force. Baekhyun thrust inside and then out, his movement fast yet tremendously violent. The lack of lube and lack of preparation hurt Minseok but the forcefulness and dominance the younger was giving him was making him more and more aroused compared to before. Baekhyun continued on with his thrusts, hitting his prostrate over and over, abusing the bundle of nerves without mercy.

“You-“ Thrust. “Are-“ Thrust. “So-“ Thrust. “Sinful-“ Thrust. “Hyung,” he groaned breathlessly.

Loud moans, lustful curses, and meeting of skin with skin was the only that could be heard. The air smelled of sex and sweat as Baekhyun still abused Minseok’s butthole; their sacs bumping into each other, adding friction to their already passionate high.

As Baekhyun hit his prostrate for the nth time, Minseok couldn’t hold it anymore. He moaned out the younger’s name, his climax already rushing out of him; his essence scattering on Baekhyun as well as his bed. He released his load with Baekhyun still ramming into him ruthlessly.

The younger soon followed him, releasing his load inside of Minseok. The elder never, in his entire life, let someone release inside of him, but at the moment, he didn’t seem to care. He just let himself be filled with Baekhyun, his arms circling around the younger’s neck and holding him close.

He panted, trying to catch his breath. Baekhyun was panting too, his breath fanning the side of Minseok’s face.

Unconsciously, Minseok was kissing away the younger’s sweat. He found himself kissing Baekhyun’s cheeks and he liked the feeling of it. He kissed all the way down to the other’s neck.

“You’re realy needy _hyung_,” Baekhyun melodiously laughed. “I just finished and you’re already wanting a second round? Am I that good?” the younger teased, looking at him with a cheeky grin.

Minseok couldn’t help but scoff. “Don’t flatter yourself too much Byun,” he told the other. “I need more proof to say you’re indeed _that good_,” he stressed teasingly.

Baekhyun, seemingly challenged with his words, stared down at him with heated eyes.

“You’ll regret that in the morning, _hyung_.”

“No, I won’t.”

“Then? What now, _hyung?_”

“Take me.”


	10. Passion-driven

Things have quickly escalated between Baekhyun and Minseok. From being a weekend thing, their affair had become a nightly activity for the two of them. As they both finish work, they would ride in Baekhyun’s car and drive the short distance from the hospital to his apartment – a perk of having the same schedule to be honest.

They would spend many hours feeling each other’s bodies; seeking warmth and pleasure that Minseok’s mind couldn’t even believe how extreme and addictive Baekhyun’s touches could be.

Day in and day out, sex was all they ever did. Addicted would be an understatement; they were too hungry, too thirsty, too lustful, too passionate that they couldn’t keep their hands off of each other.

They were in too deep and there was nothing Minseok could do to stop him from wanting more. He was always craving, always yearning for Baekhyun that he found himself practically already living in the younger’s apartment.

As the weeks passed, Minseok’s clothes have accumulated in the other’s closet as their nightly endeavours increased and became more customary.

The elder doctor would spend the night there and wake up early in the morning to go home to his own house, take a shower and get a change of clothing. Sometimes he’d already have his clothes with him. Minseok was thankful his brother Jongdae wasn’t asking him questions. They rarely talk about personal matters anymore.

He once asked Baekhyun if he had mentioned their “relationship” with his brother. But the other furiously denied and solemnly swore he never said a word to the younger Kim. “It would be awkward,” Baekhyun told him, his face scrunching up. “If Jongdae finds out about us...” he tapped his lips, thinking deeply. “I don’t really want to know what his reaction would be,” he said, shivering.

Minseok, of course, didn’t want his little brother to know too. As Baekhyun have said, it would be awkward – super awkward to be quite frank. He’s sleeping with his brother’s best friend; it’s pretty ironic and if anyone finds out – especially the people at the hospital – he would be screwed. Well, both of them would be. Even though fraternizing with colleagues wasn’t exactly against their policies, it’s seriously frowned upon. He didn’t want to risk his career, as well Baekhyun’s, because of their frolicking. That was the last thing he wanted to happen – them getting caught and putting their jobs at jeopardy. His work was his life after all. Of all things he could lose, his career was the last in the list.

And Baekhyun seemed to have thought the same thing.

Despite their clingy selves when they’re alone in their own world, they hardly glanced at each other at the hospital.

There were a few lingering touches here and there and also some suggestive stares from the younger but it was so subtle that nobody would have noticed. Even their closest workmates failed to have noticed the changes in their relationship. They still talked but it was on a professional level. Baekhyun even quitted his usual teasing on the elder. He hardly made funny comments or whatever silly or dumb thing he usually says anymore. And no one batted an eyelash about it.

No one questioned their indifference to one another and the two of them were definitely okay with that.

Their relationship was a secret. No one but themselves knew about it – and that was how Minseok wanted it to be.

**

The playfulness in Baekhyun was slowly coming out again as the days go by. The mischievousness in his eyes was twinkling, sparkling in fact that Minseok’s gut twisted uncomfortably. There was a foreboding feeling gradually rising inside of him. Byun Baekhyun always had that air of unpredictability; a spontaneity Minseok clearly hated yet was secretly fond of. The younger doctor reeked of mystery. And Minseok was a sucker for those kinds of things.

It was an ordinary day for Minseok. He was with other doctors and a few interns, watching over a surgery of one of their VIPs through a livestream. Everyone was quiet and was focusing on the surgery; some were even taking down notes. Minseok tried to concentrate too but sitting beside him was Byun Baekhyun. The younger doctor had been quiet – too quiet honestly – that something churned at the pit of Minseok’s stomach. He somehow sensed the other was up to something, and he would definitely be the one involved.

Minutes passed but Baekhyun didn’t make any movements. Minseok was honestly starting to relax when suddenly he felt a hand over his crotch. He suddenly jolted, catching the attention of the other doctors inside the room. He immediately bowed his head and apologized.

When their attention went back to the video, he turned to Baekhyun and glared at him. “Where do you think you’re touching?” he angrily whispered. The younger turned to him, his expression blank, yet his hands continued to palm him. Minseok suppressed a moan as he felt himself getting harder and harder. He tried to push Baekhyun’s hand away but the latter would always squeeze him thus his attempts were futile. The doctor had no choice but to endure Baekhyun’s teasing.

He then felt the younger pull down his zipper which terribly alarmed Minseok. “What the f*ck, Baekhyun?” he murmured, his voice shaking. Baekhyun had started to pump him, teasing the slit with subtle rubs here and there. His movements were cruel. The younger had beautiful hands and they had the talent to make Minseok scream like there’s no tomorrow. It was his weakness in all honesty – and Byun Baekhyun always made sure to use it with every chance he gets.

Minseok couldn’t believe he found himself writhing under the younger’s mercy yet again. Sweat had already formed on his face as the pleasure from Baekhyun’s doing was building up his body heat bit by bit. His mind was starting to fog up. He couldn’t even focus on the damn surgery video he was supposed to watch. He was too occupied with thoughts of Baekhyun and his cursed hands that he was all too close to throw out his senses.

A moan then almost escaped his lips but Minseok quickly covered it with a cough. He stared at Baekhyun with hooded eyes, his gaze turning into a dark glare.

“Stop this, Byun Baekhyun,” he told the younger, anger clear in his voice. “Bite your tongue, hyung,” Baekhyun whispered in his ear. His breath was hot which sent shivers down Minseok’s spine. “You don’t want the others to know I’m jerking you off while watching the surgery, don’t you?” he continued. “They’ll think you’re such a kinky bastard, you know. They already know about your promiscuous lifestyle – do you want them to know we’re sleeping together too?” he threatened.

The elder doctor couldn’t help but seethe in silence. He was beyond livid with Baekhyun yet the way his hand moved was overpowering his common sense. Lust had definitely filled him as he found himself closing to his orgasm. Baekhyun seemed to have noticed it as he sped up his pace.

Minseok was honestly surprised no one noticed them yet. It wasn’t too dark inside the door and they would be clearly seen by the others if they looked hard enough. But it seemed like everyone was too preoccupied with the surgery that they didn’t bother with anything else. The doctor was honestly relieved about that.

Feeling himself close, he turned to Baekhyun and slightly leaned on the younger’s shoulder. He bit it with all his might, suppressing his lewd moan, as he released his load in Baekhyun’s hand. Then the younger simply took out a wet tissue and stealthily cleaned up Minseok and wiped his hand.

After the surgery, before Baekhyun could run away from Minseok, the elder had already cornered him. “Don’t you ever pull that stuff again or else I’d seriously cut whatever it is between us,” he told him, his eyes filled with anger.

Baekhyun merely nodded, too scared to answer the elder. Minseok then turned around and continued with his duty.

At the end of his duty, Minseok didn’t wait for Baekhyun like he usually would. That night, he went straight home and showered.

**

“What did Baekhyun do this time?” Kyungsoo suddenly asked Minseok. It was their lunch break and Minseok was at the middle of enjoying his steamed buns when the nurse suddenly sat down in front of him and asked him out of the blue. In his surprise, his breath got caught in throat which resulted to him coughing maniacally. He reached out for his water and furiously downed everything.

After his coughing fit, he stared at Kyungsoo a little perplexed. “What do you mean?” Minseok asked carefully. “What do you mean – what did Baekhyun do this time?” he repeated. “Actually, what made you think Baekhyun did something?” he expounded, a tad befuddled with nurse’s words.

Kyungsoo was surprised with his answer. He stared at the doctor for quite a while; his huge owl-like eyes staring at Minseok, somehow scrutinizing and penetrating. It honestly bothered the doctor. Do Kyungsoo is one of his closest colleagues. He’s capable and quite good to tame troublemaker patients with stare yet Minseok never wanted to be on the other end of those gazes. He honestly hated how calculating and judgmental the nurse’s stare could be. It’s as if Kyungsoo could see whatever it is he’s hiding and he seriously doesn’t like it. He tried not fidget and continued to eat his meal. He was desperately failing though.

“You haven’t noticed, have you?” the nurse asked, his eyebrows rose as if realizing something. His eyes seemed to have doubled in size too as he stared at Minseok with intrigue and curiosity.

“What?” he dumbly reacted. “What haven’t I noticed?” he repeated Kyungsoo’s words.

The nurse shook his head before nodding towards a table near theirs. Minseok turned to the table and saw Byun Baekhyun staring at them. When the younger’s met with his, Baekhyun immediately looked away, a pout jutting from his lips. The elder’s heart squeezed a little, feeling a tad guilty, but he pushed it at the back of his subconscious. He then turned to Kyungsoo, eyebrow raised.

“He’s been staring at you like that for days,” the nurse answered his silent question. Minseok looked back at Baekhyun and saw the younger staring at them again but quickly looked away once their gazes met. He stared at Kyungsoo again. “I don’t get it,” he said, scrunching up his face in confusion.

A deep and heavy sigh escaped from Kyungsoo’s lips. “Whenever you’re mad at him,” he said, nodding to Baekhyun again. “He would always have that look on his face,” he told Minseok. “What look?” the doctor asked, tilting his head to the side. “That look,” Kyungsoo motioned with his hands. “That look somehow like a kicked puppy,” he drawled out, trying to explain to Minseok. “Baekhyun always looked like a lost puppy whenever he did something wrong and you’re ignoring him like the plague.”

Minseok’s eyebrows rose in surprise. “What? He does?” he couldn’t help but gasp. He turned to the younger again and finally caught the expression in his face. The guilt instantly came back, biting him in the ass. He bit his lower lip in thought.

He had been ignoring Baekhyun for days – a total of three, yes Minseok’s been counting – and in each day that had passed, his heart would break a little when he’d see the younger’s dull eyes. It’s not like he’s doing it because he wanted to. He wanted Baekhyun to regret what he had done during that one time whilst they were watching the surgery. They had agreed to be professional when they’re in the hospital but Baekhyun went against his words and did the most atrocious thing in front of their colleagues. No one noticed or commented about the younger jerking him off during that time but Minseok wanted for them to be discreet, to be careful, and not to attract others’ attention. He didn’t want his personal life to be on pedestal for others to talk about behind his back – or Baekhyun’s too.

The younger had a squeaky clean reputation at the hospital and Minseok didn’t want to ruin this by associating himself as his lover – or something like that. They had no label as far as Minseok was aware of yet some people might have a different opinion. He just wanted whatever it is going on between them to be a secret and away from the limelight solely not for his sake but mostly for the younger’s. He thought he was discreet with his feelings but somehow Kyungsoo had seen right through him.

“I just want him to learn a lesson,” he then said, not meeting with nurse’s eyes. “He needs to learn his boundaries and know how to respect my personal space,” he explained. “We’ve known each other for years, he should have known better,” he muttered under his breath.

“Well, you should just forgive him,” Kyungsoo told him. Minseok was suddenly irked. “It’s not easy to forgive what Baekhyun has done,” he refuted, a frown set on his lips. “If you keep on ignoring him, someone might take away your puppy,” he commented, nodding his head to Baekhyun’s direction again.

With a sigh, Minseok turned to the table and saw someone sitting with the younger doctor. It was a patient. He instantly recognized him as Wu Yifan, one of Baekhyun’s patients if he could remember correctly. He’s a basketball player from China and had been under the hospital’s care for a few months. He had already been discharged weeks ago but was still required to stop by the hospital for his check-ups. It wasn’t weird to see him in the hospital – even if it was in the cafeteria.

Minseok was about to ask Kyungsoo what he meant when he noticed Wu Yifan was holding a bouquet of flowers, and he was handing them to Baekhyun. His eyebrows rose in great surprise, his heart beating wildly inside his chest.

He knew Wu Yifan was gay. He was famous not only for his talent in basketball but he was also known for his sexuality. He was one of the few who proudly declared they’re gay and was greatly welcomed by many; albeit haters still roamed around him though.

But Minseok was floored. He wasn’t honestly expecting to see this kind of spectacle happen in front his eyes – never in a million years to be quite exact. Yifan had handed the bouqet to Baekhyun and it was obvious the doctor was blushing. His cheeks were flushed a rosy red and the sight greatly annoyed Minseok.

Not wanting to see more, he excused himself and immediately left the cafeteria, leaving an amused Kyungsoo and an extremely confused Baekhyun behind him.

**

Minseok was seething with rage as he waited for Baekhyun in his apartment. He had taken an early off, and took a taxi to the younger’s place. He knew the lock code – Baekhyun told him – and the guard already knew his face so it wasn’t hard for him to come. He hasn’t been there for three whole days and the apartment had accumulated quite a mess. He took a mental note to clean up after he’d give the younger a piece of his mind.

He wasn’t exactly sure why he was so annoyed – or maybe angry should be the word – but he just couldn’t quite get over what he had seen earlier at the cafeteria. He didn’t like it when Baekhyun blushed because of Yifan. It didn’t sit well with him to be quite honest.

There was beep coming from the entrance, Minseok knew it was the younger doctor. He heard the other enter and his footsteps come to a halt. Baekhyun must have noticed his shoes already.

“Hyung… you’re here,” the younger carefully drawled out, his eyes a little hopeful. He walked towards Minseok and tried to hug him but the elder didn’t budge from his seat. He had his arms crossed over his chest, trying to refrain himself from hugging back. His fingers honestly twitched, tempted to finally touch Baekhyun again after three days.

When Baekhyun noticed the elder was moving, he immediately released him and stared at him hesitantly. “Are you still mad, hyung?” he asked, pout already on his lips. Minseok’s fingers twitched again. He desperately wanted to caress the younger’s lips but he kept his composure. He stared at Baekhyun, his gaze unrelenting. “I think you haven’t learned your lesson yet, Byun Baekhyun,” he icily replied. “Touching me, jerking me off at the middle of watching a surgery – I’m seriously disappointed in you,” he furthered, anger clear in his voice. “I never felt so violated in my life and I can’t believe a dongsaeng of mine had the guys to do it. I’m really disgusted with you,” he added.

“I won’t do it ever again, hyung!” Baekhyun then said. “I promise it would never happen again!”

But Minseok had made up his mind not to forgive him anytime soon.

“I think I’ve been too lenient with you, Byun Baekhyun,” he told the younger. Minseok stood up from his seat and carried the chair to the bedroom. Baekhyun followed closely behind him.

He then sat down on the chair again whilst the younger stood in front of him.

“Strip,” was all he said, his voice loud and commanding.

Despite his confusion, Baekhyun did what he was told and had stripped everything. His dress shirt, tie, pants, and underwear were laid on his desk as he stood butt-naked in front of Minseok. He patiently waited for elder’s orders.

Minseok took his time by scrutinizing the younger’s body. It had been only few days since their last but it felt years for him. He honestly missed Baekhyun’s warmth and he was gravely craving for the younger. He noticed the slight hard-on he was sporting and it immediately made Minseok’s libido rise.

He stared at the younger’s eyes with hooded eyes. “On all fours Baek,” he then ordered. Baekhyun obediently complied.

With his butt up, Minseok suppressed a moan at the sight. The younger always had such a beautiful body and it always made Minseok crazy but seeing his ass so clearly almost made his resolve crumble. He shook his head and continued on his mission.

He took out a box from underneath the bed and opened it. He first covered the younger’s eyes with a blindfold. He then took out a ring and placed it on the younger’s member. Baekhyun was clearly surprised by the little contraption because his head turned towards where the elder was, a silent question hung in the air.

“You’ve been such a bad kid lately, so you need to control yourself. I think a cockring would do the trick, don’t you think?” Minseok simply answered. He then proceeded with stripping his clothes.

Baekhyun heard the shuffling of his clothes which resulted to his member twitching. Minseok noticed this so he clicked his tongue. “Tsk tsk,” he said, shaking his head. “Such an impatient pup we have here, eh?” he taunted.

Without warning, he hit Baekhyun’s ass with a flog. The sound of rubber hitting skin as well as Baekhyun’s scream reverberated in the whole apartment. The younger’s skin turned a tinge of pink and it was honestly a beautiful colour that Minseok couldn’t help but hit Baekhyun again. It turned pink again and the sight definitely pleased him.

“No screaming my dear pup, or else,” he threatened. Baekhyun merely nodded his head, his lips shut tight.

Minseok repeated the beating until the younger’s ass had been decorated with beautiful splashes of pink and red. He couldn’t help but gently caress the marks.

“Have you learnt your lesson now, my little pup?” he then asked, his fingers tracing the lashes. Baekhyun shook his head. This reaction made Minseok’s brows rise. He then noticed the leaking pre-cum of the younger and realized the other seemed to have enjoyed his beating. A smirk suddenly appeared on his lips.

He decided to tease his hoobae a little. He caressed his ass and spread his cheeks. Without warning, he inserted his tongue inside Baekhyun’s hole and even played with his sacs. He felt the younger’s knees shake. He continued, also playing with Baekhyun’s member, giving it a squeeze or a stroke here and there. He was honestly enjoying having the younger under his mercy.

Feeling a tad bolder, Minseok inserted a finger inside Baekhyun. And then another and another and another. Almost his whole hand was being sucked in by Baekhyun and Minseok couldn’t help but wonder and be amazed by the sight. He continued on and when he hit a certain nerve, Baekhyun’s whole demeanour shook. Minseok knew he had found his spot.

“Will I be able to make you cum with just my hands?” he mused, his smirk growing. “Or should I just shove my member up your ass?” he then asked, nipping on Baekhyun’s ear.

The younger merely shivered and stayed quiet. Minseok understood what the other wanted but he wanted to tease him more.

He flipped Baekhyun, making his back lay on the bed. Their eyes finally met and Minseok saw the pleading eyes on the younger. He simply smiled and gave him a chaste kiss on the lips. “I’ll give you what you want if you’ll be good.”

Silently, he then took out a vibrator from the box and inserted it on Baekhyun. He turned it on and put it on the highest level. The younger squirmed but didn’t open his mouth; he didn’t utter a single word. He simply bit on his lower lip and stared helplessly at Minseok. The elder honestly felt a surge of pride for his control over the other.

Seeing as Baekhyun had been so obedient, Minseok finally decided to grant his wish. He leaned down and gave him a long, languid kiss as his hand worked their way down the younger’s member and pulled out the cockring. With only a few strokes, Baekhyun released his load whilst the elder swallowed his moans.

They continued kissing lazily, Baekhyun sticky with sweat and cum and Minseok still clothed but with an evident hard-on.

**

“I won’t ever do anything you don’t like, hyung,” the younger said after a while. He was still sticky and yucky but the elder doesn’t seem to mind as they cuddled together. Minseok turned to him and smiled. “Good because I really don’t like it when you disobey me,” he answered.

Baekhyun stared at Minseok, blinking a few times before mischievously smiling. “But if doing it meant getting spanked by you, then I might disobey you a couple times…” he drawled out.

“Yah Byun Baekhyun!” Minseok hissed; hitting the younger’s chest quite painfully. “I’m kidding, hyung! Just kidding!” the younger refuted. “I won’t do it, I promise. I don’t want you to get mad and ignore me after all. Even though it was only a couple of days but I was seriously suffering from withdrawal. I honestly couldn’t imagine how I survived without you,” he added, his lips jutting into a pout.

“You’re weird,” the elder couldn’t help but comment. “But I missed you too,” he quietly mumbled.

The younger obviously heard it but decided to keep quiet. He simply smiled at Minseok and pecked his lips. “Good night, hyung,” he said, snuggling closer.

Minseok merely shook his head and sighed but snuggled closer too. He let his eyes flutter to a close, his mind – as well as his heart – finally at peace.


	11. His Past

Minseok was feeling extremely unsettled. It was already late, a little past midnight or so, and he was still annoyingly wide awake despite his tired body’s cry for rest. He had closed his eyes earlier and had settled himself comfortably, hoping to finally relax after a long day but his mind wouldn’t be silenced at all. Events from earlier and memories from years ago flashed through his mind, attacking him with waves of unwanted emotions. He clutched his chest, his heart squeezing agonizingly as he let his mind wander, finally giving in to the pain.

Unsettled was putting it lightly – Minseok was terribly distraught, tremendously and seriously distressed.

He then turned to his side, gaze falling onto the reason for his uneasiness. The young doctor felt his heart stop for a moment.

Absentmindedly, he reached out his hand. Clumsy fingers touched soft skin; Minseok’s breath got caught in his throat. _“Why am I getting so worked up because of you?” _he wondered, his lips forming a frown.

Afraid to wake the person, Minseok lightly traced the contours of their sleeping face. _“Why am I so affected?” _he continued to muse.

He then let himself get lost in the events that happened earlier.

**

It was a rare long weekend for Minseok. Taking breaks for an extended amount of time wasn’t in the young doctor’s vocabulary but with the recent things happening with him lately – his fiery hoobae being one of them – Minseok decided it was finally time to ask for a well-deserved vacation.

The doctor had just woken up. Jongdae was busy packing his stuff for a convention he’d be attending for a few days – “Leaving it all to the last minute,” the elder grumbled. Shrugging offhandedly, Minseok made his way towards the kitchen, deciding to prepare a quick breakfast for the two of them.

He just finished cooking an omelette when they heard the doorbell ring. Someone was at their door at 6 o’clock in the morning on a Saturday. Both brothers looked at each other in confusion. “We’re you expecting someone?” Minseok asked the younger. Jongdae simply frowned and shook his head. “How about you, hyung?” he asked. The elder shook his head too.

Jongdae then walked towards the intercom to check who their intruder – guest – was.

“Oh my God! I forgot!” the younger Kim gasped out loud. Minseok stared at his brother, puzzled. “What did you-“ before he could finish his sentence, Jongdae had made his way towards the elder, puppy eyes already set. The doctor gulped, suddenly wary of his brother’s next words.

“Hyung! Just this once! Please!” Jongdae pleaded, tugging his arm. “Can you accompany Baekhyun to his grandmother’s house today?”

Minseok’s eyebrows shot up in both surprise and bewilderment. “I what?!” he responded, his voice squeaking slightly. _“Accompany Baekhyun?”_ he thought_. “Byun freaking Baekhyun?” _A frown suddenly made its way onto his lips.

His hoobae was _the reason_ Minseok asked for a vacation. He decided to stay away from the hospital for a few days to let his mind rest from thinking of _only _Byun Baekhyun because it was scaring the heck out of the doctor but now his brother wanted him to go with the very core of all his headaches? Minseok almost scoffed out loud.

_“Nope! No way in hell!”_ he mentally shook his head.

His eyes turning into slits, he glared at his brother disdainfully. “Why would I accompany him?” he asked, his frown turning darker. “Can’t he visit his grandmother on his own? Or ask someone else to come with?” he continued, noticing the bitterness in his tone with his last question but stubbornly brushed it off. “I’d rather be back in the hospital doing rounds, thank you very much!” he sarcastically added.

Jongdae seemed to have been caught off-guard with his upfront refusal. The shocked and helpless expression the younger had almost made Minseok want to take back his words. _Almost._

The younger Kim then pursed his lips, his gaze turning thoughtful.

“Hyung,” Jongdae sighed, his voice excruciatingly soft that Minseok felt it took a lot of strength for his brother just to reply. “Please go with Baekhyun today,” the younger said, eyes imploring. “I promised him I’d always go with him – _every year_,” he stressed. “But somehow this year, I mixed up the dates with this stupid convention and already made arrangements, accepting the honour of being a speaker. Clearly, I can’t just drop the convention but I also can’t let Baekhyun go there alone – _I just can’t._”

“Why?” Minseok found himself asking. “Why can’t you let Baekhyun go alone? He’s a grown man and he can handle himself,” he continued, his brows knotting together. “Baekhyun’s quite capable you know, despite his naivety,” he said, trying to lighten the somewhat heavy atmosphere between them.

Jongdae’s lips slightly curled upwards but his eyes remained a tad sorrowful. “It’s his grandmother’s death anniversary today,” he finally told Minseok, a sad smile now on his face. “Aside from his grandmother, Baekhyun has no one he considers as family. When she died, it took me a great amount of effort to keep Baekhyun alive. I’m scared – especially today – to leave him alone. He’s unbelievably emotionally unstable, hyung. He might do something stupid again…”

And that last sentence did it for Minseok. All of his inhibitions of having to spend an entire day with the very essence of annoying yet undeniably endearing was erased, faded into oblivion, and had turned into deep worry and concern.

He heaved a sigh, as if the action could ease the heavy feeling inside his heart – it didn’t. “I’ll go,” he told his brother. “Don’t worry about Baekhyun, Dae-ah. I’ll watch over that brat,” he said, offering his brother an understanding smile.

His brother gave him a grateful side hug before going back towards the door to finally let Baekhyun inside their apartment and tell him of the change of plans.

Minseok heard the younger doctor’s footsteps, his ears perking up when Baekhyun spoke. He clutched his chest, trying claw or rip his heart out and relieve himself of the pain. The intensity of emotions he was feeling confused Minseok greatly. He saw Baekhyun from the corner of his eyes and by just seeing him sent his heart racing – as if he was running for a marathon.

Byun Baekhyun gave Minseok a paradox of feelings. From irritation to fondness, from agitated to concern, the doctor was truly at a loss for words. He had decided to stay away but destiny seemed to be playing with him, wanting them to be closer.

He shook his head, already accepting the fact of his forgone vacation. He then made his way towards his room to pack his things.

Minseok saw Baekhyun in their living room talking to Jongdae. He was wearing a white shirt underneath a grey coat, black pants, and white sneakers. He usually looked younger than his age whenever he was in regular clothes yet today, Baekhyun seemed to have matured. When he removed his glasses and Minseok saw his tired eyes, the younger looked like his age, or a couple of years more. Byun Baekhyun honestly looked terrible and gloomy – _“Far from his jovial self,”_ Minseok couldn’t help but notice.

When their eyes met, Minseok knew it was going to be a long day for the two of them.

**

Baekhyun’s grandmother was buried at a special cemetery on the outskirts of Seoul. Instead of gravestones, trees were planted in their memory.

In front of each tree, there’s a sign wherein a short description about the deceased was written. Some had pictures whilst some had the person’s favourite quotes. For Baekhyun’s grandmother however, there were only three words written. It was short yet the message was clear as a spring’s day.

“You are loved,” Minseok read the words, his fingers tracing the letters. Somehow he felt it wasn’t a message for Baekhyun’s grandmother but for Baekhyun himself.

He then looked at Baekhyun who was standing beside him. He noticed the tears the younger was trying to hold in. The doctor could only shake his head in dubiety. “Yah, you can cry in front of me you know,” Minseok told Baekhyun, hitting the younger’s shoulder lightly. Baekhyun turned to him with wide eyes. “You’ve done all sorts of things in front me – some extremely kinky stuff, mind you,” he added, smiling slightly. “Crying won’t make me think less of you as a man,” he assured, offering his hand.

Without words, Baekhyun took his hand and entwined their fingers together. Electricity coursed through Minseok’s body, awakening his every sense. He had held hands with Baekhyun before, during one of their nightly rendezvous, but this was different – a whole freaking different situation which sent Minseok’s mind into overdrive.

Suddenly, Minseok was realizing a lot of things.

He was visiting Baekhyun’s grandmother’s grave. They were holding hands. They had been having sex for months. They had cuddled at nights, watched movies together; Minseok was even allowing Baekhyun to kiss him from time to time even when they’re still at the hospital. Everything about the younger, the things they did together or the things Baekhyun did to him felt _different._

He glanced at the younger, still lost in his musing. He then pursed his lips.

_“It’s as if…”_

Minseok couldn’t even finish his thought.

It was impossible for him after all. It was just plain impossible for Kim Minseok.

He shook his head, his heart still hammering annoyingly inside his chest; he found himself squeezing Baekhyun’s hand. The younger squeezed back in response.

They stood there, hand in hand, both too lost and deep into their own reveries.

**

Minseok found himself in the living room of a waned wooden two storey house in their old neighbourhood. It was the house Baekhyun had stayed in during high school – his grandmother’s house. The neighbourhood was still the same as it was years ago.

Despite the many developments in the vicinity, Minseok still couldn’t help but feel a tad nostalgic from his youth.

He stared at the pictures on the walls in front of him – they were all of Baekhyun. There was one of him as a baby, one from his pre-school play, one from his very first baseball game, one from his middle graduation. It was clear to Minseok that Baekhyun’s grandmother had loved the younger greatly.

As he studied the pictures though, Misneok noticed there were all of Baekhyun and his grandmother _only._ It was only the two of them – no one else but them.

He suddenly remembered Jongdae’s words. _“Besides his grandmother, Baekhyun has no one…”_ – those words repeating inside his mind like a broken record.

_“I thought he has an older brother?”_ Minseok couldn’t help but wonder. He pursed his lips in thought as he tried to jog his memory. _“But even from back then in high school, I hardly ever saw anyone else visit their house…”_

Right then, Baekhyun came back into the living room, carrying a tray with tea and sandwiches.

“Thank you for coming with me sunbae,” the younger uttered, tone shy and a tad awkward.

Minseok could only smile. He didn’t know what to reply in all honesty.

_“Should have I told him that Jongdae practically emotionally blackmailed me into coming?”_

He considered thoughtfully but shrugged it off. He took a sip of tea and let his eyes wander around the small yet cosy space.

This had been the home of Byun Baekhyun for three years. In the two years he had lived in the same neighbourhood with the young lad, this was regrettably the first time he had entered his home. They were hardly friends during high school after all but Minseok somehow felt a twinge of remorse as he gazed at Baekhyun’s pictures yet again.

The Byun Baekhyun from years ago and the present one seemed to be different people despite the unchanging appearance. Maybe it was because he had grown mature or had already lived through and experienced a lot of things; but definitely, the past and present Baekhyun were too different that Minseok couldn’t understand why we was even thinking or bothering about it.

Somehow, it felt weird for Minseok. He didn’t care before yet now…

“I came from a broken family,” Baekhyun then spoke, reeling Minseok out of his thoughts.

To say he was shocked would be an understatement. He was rather taken aback from the younger’s sudden revelation. He stared, quite stupefied and speechless. What could he say, anyway? So he let Baekhyun talk. Byun Baekhyun was quite the talker after all, unlike Minseok who’s the total opposite. He let the younger speak his heart out – it was the first time after all.

It was the first time Byun Baekhyun was putting his guard down and Minseok was clearly not letting this opportunity pass. He listened carefully, absorbing every word the younger would utter. He gave all of his attention to Baekhyun because he knew, he certainly knew, this was the only time the younger doctor would let him see his vulnerability.

“I came from a broken family,” Baekhyun repeated. “After giving birth to me, my mom suddenly left my dad – leaving with no proper goodbye at all. She just upped and vanished from our lives like some criminal escaping from the authorities.”

“I wasn’t even a _day_ old when she left,” he spat bitterly. “She just left her just-born child, crying and wailing for his mother, and disappeared.”

Minseok reached out and squeezed Baekhyun’s hand.

“I was primarily raised by my grandmother,” he continued. “She’s the mother of the useless person who gave birth to me,” he added, quickly explaining his relations. Minseok simply nodded in understanding. “My dad was too heartbroken – as my gran kindly put it – to take care of me. He couldn’t even _try_ to love his son. He was too busy wallowing in his own pain that he neglected me.”

“There was a time I was almost bitten by a neighbour’s dog because he left the gate open. I was lying in my cot, at the backyard, when suddenly the dog entered and came to me. If my grandmother hadn’t arrived, I would have gotten a huge ass scar on my face from that dog,” he said, scrunching up his face in anger.

“That was the last straw for my grandmother,” he said, eyes welling up in tears. “She took me in and raised me as her own,” he mumbled, lips trembling.

Minseok had already moved beside Baekhyun, catching a stray tear with his thumb.

Soon enough, Baekhyun was quietly sobbing in his arms.

“My dad soon remarried and I lived with them throughout middle school,” he continued despite his unsteady breath. “My stepmother was nice and she had a son from her previous marriage – he’s the big brother I told you about – and we were okay…” he drawled out. “If it’s only the three of us, we were happy. We were like a family,” he paused, biting his lower lips as he tried to calm down. “But whenever my dad is there, things just seem so serious, so heavy. We hardly laughed in the house when he’s there.”

“Insulting me was his past time,” he then said. “He’d compare me with hyung, saying he’s proud to have him as a son because he does well in school, why shouldn’t I be more like him. He’d insult my playing baseball. He hasn’t even watched a single game in my entire baseball career and had the nerve to call me _‘just a bloke who throws balls’_. He couldn’t even understand my reason of playing!”

Baekhyun was furiously wiping his tears away. “I loved baseball more than anything! It was the reason I had friends, that I was laughing, that I could tell I was alive,” he told Minseok. “How can he just… just…” he tried to come up with a word or two but only sobs came out of his mouth.

Minseok wrapped his arms around the younger’s waist and pulled him close to his body. “You are loved, Baekhyun-ah,” he found himself saying.

He realized those were the words Baekhyun’s grandmother wanted him to remember. Some sort of will that she wanted to ingrain into her grandson’s mind, and heart. He hugged Baekhyun a little tighter.

The younger sobbed, wailed. He let his heart out.

He was too tired giving appearances. He was too tired being happy. He was too tired smiling. He was too tired being strong. He was just _too tired._

And Minseok’s arms were the perfect hiding place.

Throwing all of his reservations, Baekhyun finally indulged himself.

**

Both Minseok and Baekhyun decided to stay the night. They were both too exhausted and drained to drive back. It was Misneok’s long weekend and Baekhyun’s day-off after all, they could procrastinate at going back to their normal lives.

They transformed the living room into a fort of pillows and blankets that Minseok started to think they were young again.

Cuddled closely together, they shared stories from their youths. Minseok heartily laughed, shedding happy tears, as Baekhyun recounted a funny story whilst he was in baseball camp with Donghae and Hyukjae. Baekhyun had a lot of stories to share, and Minseok found himself eagerly listening to the younger, hanging onto his every word.

Minseok, too, shared some of his experiences. How he’d gotten a scholarship throughout medical school and how he’d first met his idol, Jung Yunho, at the hospital they currently worked. He even shared how he’d caught Kyungsoo and Chanyeol making out in the latter’s hospital room. Baekhyun bellowed in laughter at that. Hearing the younger laugh made Minseok’s heart grow a little fonder, and a tad warmer.

He knew he was skimming through his life, opening himself up – a rare occasion for the doctor – but somehow, being with Baekhyun made him more… free.

Not completely, though.

Earlier, they had passed by their old high school; the buildings still the same aside from its paint colour. It used to be a tacky colour of a mix between beige and blue but now it’s a vibrant red and white. It looked better, according to Baekhyun, and Minseok had to agree. Memories from his senior year then overcame the doctor but Minseok violently pushed the thoughts away. A certain person’s face had popped up inside his mind; he squeezed Baekhyun’s hand in pure panic. The squeeze in return would always, somehow a bit strange, calm him.

He could see the questioning gaze Baekhyun had given him that time but Minseok refused to open his mouth. He refused to reminisce, he refused to remember.

So Minseok settled with stories from his college life, his internship, and even from his frivolous sex life. He avoided his high school memories. Roughly a decade has already passed but the pain it had caused still hasn’t disappeared.

Minseok had given Baekhyun a meaningful gaze and the younger understood it right away. Baekhyun merely entwined their hands together – like earlier in front of Baekhyun’s grandmother’s grave, and let Minseok chatter away about muscles and tendons, not minding that the elder had his guard up, refusing to acknowledge the elephant in the room.

**

As Byun Baekhyun soundly slept, Minseok studied, deep in thought.

“What did you do to me, Byun Baekhyun?” he whispered, his fingers carding through the younger’s soft hair.

He had dyed it back to a honey blonde colour – Minseok’s favourite hair colour for the younger – and the elder couldn’t help but let his mind open Pandora’s box.

“Luhan had the same hair colour back in high school,” he mumbled, remembering the face he tried so hard to forget. Minseok thought he had forgotten how beautiful Luhan was but his mind seemed to have engraved in his memory the latter’s face perfectly. His heart ached. “They weren’t as soft as yours, but they were soft nonetheless,” he chuckled lightly, distracting himself from his unnerving memories. “He talked a lot like you,” he added. “But you’re louder and more annoying,” he scowled. “Yet you’re strangely endearing…” he commented, sighing to himself.

“Remember that time at the auditorium? When you suddenly played the piano?” Minseok then said; a sad smile on his face. “Luhan left that time… leaving everyone – _leaving me ­–_ without even saying goodbye.” His breath got caught on his throat. “I don’t know if you knew I was there, but I think you knew. I was bawling my eyes out after all,” he gently poked Baekhyun’s cheek, the younger still not stirring from his deep slumber. “You played the piano and sang a song…” he drawled out. “You know, I stopped crying because of you.”

Minseok traced Baekhyun’s lips. “How can you sing so beautifully?” he questioned, frowning a little. “I was honestly mesmerized that time, spellbound even.”

“I don’t know how you did it, but after you sang, somehow, a heavy weight was lifted off my shoulder,” Minseok continued on. “I felt lighter, honestly. Although I was still in pain at that time, hearing you sing helped me relax and calm down.”

He cuddled closer to the younger, his arms automatically circling the other’s waist. “You have this strange way of calming me down, Byun Baekhyun… like how a spring warms up everyone after a cold and unforgiving winter.”

“I took a vacation to free myself of thinking about you but look where I am now?”

Minseok found it humorlessly ironic. He cuddled even closer to Baekhyun.

“Look what you’ve turned me into, Byun Baekhyun,” the elder commented, his tone teasing. “I don’t do cuddles but here I am, cuddling you like a koala bear. You should wrap your arms around me too, it’s unfair you know!”

As if hearing his whine, Baekhyun curled into Minseok and wrapped his arm around his waist, pulling him impossibly closer. He nuzzled the elder’s neck and breathed in. A smile instantly appeared on the younger’s lips. He was still asleep though. Minseok simply rolled his eyes, annoyed yet frustratingly pleased with Baekhyun’s reaction.

He gave Baekhyun a peck on the lips before finally letting sleep overwhelm him.

**

When Minseok’s breathing was already even, Baekhyun then only opened his eyes. He stared at the elder’s sleeping face, heart drumming and thoughts racing.

“Is this really happening?” was all he could say, too speechless and dumbfounded with Minseok’s words.

The younger bit his lower lip, trying to suppress a smile. He knew he shouldn’t get it to his head but Minseok _finally _opened up to him; albeit indirectly. But it was a start. It was definitely a start!

Byun Baekhyun was beyond thrilled to even care Minseok it was about _that_ person. He was honestly over the moon to give a damn.

Smiling at the elder, he placed a kiss Minseok’s forehead and lovingly whispered:

“Good night, hyung.”


	12. Him

Upon their return, Minseok and Baekhyun were immediately thrown back into a busy schedule of rounds, rehabilitation, and check-ups. Despite leaving their work in capable hands, having both their top doctors on leave was risky for the hospital. Their quick return was appreciatively welcomed with a sigh of relief from the management. It was a tad dramatic honestly since nothing huge or detrimental had happened in their absence.

Both doctors went through their demanding routine of patients, white robes and iodoform with renewed vigour much to their colleagues’ amusement and bewilderment; their short vacation seemingly had given them the chance to replenish their strengths and come back on duty filled with revived power and gusto.

In truth, the weekend off did wonders for both Minseok and Baekhyun – _especially_ in terms of their so called relationship.

Once the sun had risen and had sunlight peeking through the drawn curtains, both had found themselves with limbs and blankets tangled cosily and _perfectly_ together. Slowly awakening from their deep slumber, chocolate brown eyes met with hazel brown embers. As their gazes search each other, a heavy atmosphere suddenly filled the air. Happenings from yesterday – their heart-to-heart talk, holding hands in the midst of the street, and sweet kisses exchanged whilst in public – bombarded their memories and neither knew how to simply breach the subject.

Without thought, Minseok slowly leaned in to Baekhyun and connected their lips; the kiss practiced and already second nature. It was slow; it was sweet; it had Minseok _keeling_ from the warmth seeping through his skin and into his bones. He was utterly gutted, gobsmacked with the heart-wrenching feeling surging within him.

It took all of his willpower not to cry.

He then caressed Baekhyun’s cheeks and slowly reached up to grasp his honey-coloured hair, hands slightly shaking. He nipped, he sucked, he licked; it was as if Minseok was kissing him for the very first time, savouring each and every caress of their lips. There was just this sensation – a slow burn at the pits of his stomach, churning and sweltering and _maddening_.

Minseok felt euphoric and scared at the same time. He wanted to pull Baekhyun closer – closer and closer until there was no sliver of space between them. But he also wanted to push away the younger far away from him until they were oceans, or worlds apart. His heart was honestly torn between blissful sighs and anxious feelings – he didn’t know what to do.

The kiss continued to be languid and unhurried until Baekhyun started cheekily grinding their hips together; exactly how Minseok liked it. The elder released a deep groan, lust eventually building up in his groin.

His ministrations were deliberately well-calculated, sinfully sinful, and made to make a point of need, of hunger, of urgent _fuck_; Baekhyun definitely knew how to make Minseok let go - he’s the only one to be quite honest.

Growing furious, Minseok sat up and straddled the younger, pinning Baekhyun below him. He grabbed for the latter’s wrists and securely placed them above his head, immobilizing the other. He then leaned down, his eyes closed and their noses slightly brushing.

“You’re a minx, you know that?” he breathed, his lips ghosting Baekhyun’s. He then opened his eyes and lifted his gaze towards the younger. “Always, always playing with me.” His voice was just above a whisper.

The corners of his mouth then curled upwards, a smirk gradually appearing on his face. “You’re an annoying minx.” Minseok bared his pearly white teeth and grinned cheekily at Baekhyun. The younger merely scoffed and rolled his eyes.

“But you’re _my_ annoying minx.”

Everything around them then seemed to have stopped by Minseok’s words, time freezing over in that intense moment. The air between them was heavy; the silence so thick that no knife could ever cut through. Neither spoke and both held their breaths, eyes searching and hearts racing.

Both became aware of the gravity of Minseok’s words. They’ve been sleeping together for _months_, technically going out with each other and not bothering for a label. They both knew they were exclusive but didn’t _necessarily_ expressed it outright. But now... With Minseok _finally_ saying it out loud, finally expressing Baekhyun to be _his_… they both knew things were getting pretty damn serious.

“Hyung I…”

But before Baekhyun could finish his words, Minseok kissed him. Hotly. Searingly. _Wantonly_.

It was the calm before the storm.

**

Friday then came and there was a meeting with the hospital’s newest VIP patient coming from China. Minseok was tasked to be the patient’s head doctor.

As the doctor walked silently through the hallway, the room where the meeting would be held was getting closer and closer; an immense amount of emotions suddenly overwhelmed him, throwing the doctor a little off his usual composed self.

He knew he was excited, quite ecstatic actually, because the VIP patient was a special case of injuries resulted from serious complications. It was honestly one of Minseok’s favourites - albeit the great danger it was for the patient, the doctor couldn’t help but be thrilled of the challenge. If he remembered correctly from the advice Doctor Jung gave him, the complications seemed like a mystery he needed to understand and the rehabilitation like a puzzle he needed to find a way to solve.

There was nothing much Minseok could do at the moment since he’s still in the dark of the patient’s injuries as well as their identity. Everyone’s keeping mum about it so the patient might certainly be a high profile athlete. _‘Olympics representative perhaps,’_ he thought, his lips pursed pensively. “Maybe that’s why I’m getting jittery,” he muttered, his brows furrowing together.

Minseok really hated what he’s feeling at the moment. He was excited - really _freaking_ excited - yet at the same there was this incessant gnawing at the back of his mind, telling him to just run away. Trepidation had settled at the pits of his stomach and he hated it. The foreboding feeling creeping up and crawling on his skin was making him utterly uncomfortable but he knew he had to face the music. Running away from a case wasn’t like Minseok after all. So he took a deep breath and released a heavy sigh, gathering himself before braving the meeting.

**

When the doctor entered the room, Minseok scanned the faces of his team. He noticed they were all the best of the best in the hospital. ‘_Definitely Olympics representative,’_ he surmised with a wry smile.

As he took his seat, more people from their hospital had arrived. Minseok couldn’t help but be aware of the blaring absence of a certain honey-coloured prat. A silent sigh escaped his lips.

Much to his dismay, Byun Baekhyun wasn’t part of their team. The younger doctor was regretfully away (for Minseok at least) attending to his patient’s rehabilitation in their branch in Daegu. Baekhyun had left yesterday morning and would return after a week; or maybe a couple more, highly depending on the patient’s improvement.

They all knew Baekhyun would be successful on his assignment and would be back in no time yet Minseok couldn’t help but be cranky about it. The doctor found himself back to his old ways, terrorizing and snapping at anyone who’d dare to come his way. They had just officially established their relationship and Baekhyun just _had_ to be sent away. Minseok honestly couldn’t blame his demon side letting loose again. He thought of the assignment unfair and unreasonable. (Okay _not entirely unreasonable_ but still, he hated being away from that prat.)

To his chagrin though, a certain quick-witted nurse had realized the reason why Minseok was acting so… foolish.

“Your affinity towards your honey-coloured pup is quite amusing, hyung,” Kyungsoo quietly whispered as he sat down next to the doctor. “You’re sulking too much,” he said, his tone teasing and playful. “Just give Baekhyun a call already and tell him you miss him. I’m sure he’d come home immediately with his tail wagging behind him,” he added with a chuckle.

Minseok wanted to snap at him but regrettably Director Jung had just entered the meeting room, silencing the quiet murmurs of the doctors. There were four people behind him whom Minseok assumed to be the patient’s coach and staff. The four sat with the director at the head of the table. Minseok glanced around, trying to find their athlete but failed. The elusive VIP patient was still nowhere to be seen.

Folders were then distributed to the doctors as the meeting officially started, containing the patient’s medical record. It was roughly an inch thick or more which shocked Minseok greatly. ‘_Lot of history there,’_ he thought, his lips pursed into a thin line. '_Definitely going to be a challenge,’_ he mused.

When he was about to open the folder, Minseok suddenly felt a chill run down his spine. Someone was staring at him intensely; as if drilling holes into his skull. The intensity bothered the doctor greatly. His heartbeat even sped up a little. Sweat started to trickle down from his temple.

He looked up and carefully scanned around the room, trying to discern the person’s gaze.

A figure by the door caught his eyes. They were wearing a hoodie over their head, also a cap and a face mask, totally hiding his identity. Minseok then knew he was the patient and he was the one staring at him. He anxiously gulped.

His eyes then squinted, a sense of familiarity suddenly washing over him.

The way he carried himself somehow reminded Minseok of someone he knew. From his lean figure to his laid back manner, he was scarily familiar to the doctor. Trepidation swirled inside of him, his gut twisting and churning uncomfortably.

Their gazes then met and Minseok _instantly_ recognized him.

The doctor felt his throat constrict. He wanted to look away. He seriously wanted to stand up and walk out of the meeting room. But he couldn’t. Minseok remained seated, his whole body immobilized as memories from the past started obscuring his vision.

He couldn’t stop the tsunami of flashbacks crashing before him.

_// flashback //_

Minseok cursed his luck. Of all _days_ to wake up late, it just had to be on his _first_ day in middle school. He knew he’d regret starting the manga his friend had recommended. But it wasn’t _his_ fault he couldn’t sleep last night. He was both anxious and excited to start his middle school so his nerves were quite hyper. It wasn’t his fault when he just wanted to get some sleep by reading a few chapters. It honestly wasn’t his fault he somehow _got hooked_ and greedily read all the posted volumes in one night, leaving him with only a couple of hours left to sleep. It _really_ wasn’t his fault at all.

Like a trained soldier, he swiftly got out of bed and went into the bathroom. He quickly washed his face, brushed his teeth and ran back to his room. He then frantically put on his uniform, ignoring the few dust bunnies on his blazer. _‘Where did that come from?’_ He pursed his lips in thought. He checked his watch and shook his head. He’d take care of it later once he’s at school. He then picked up his bag, mentally checking if he’s got everything he needed for today, and ran down the stairs. He then went towards the dining room.

“Good morning!” he greeted his mom and younger brother as he grabbed for a piece of toast and a glass of milk. Without stopping to sit down, he grabbed for his lunch and put it in his bag. He then kissed his mom on the cheek and ruffled Jongdae’s hair. “Bye mom! See you later, Jongdae!” he said after finishing his toast and milk.

“Yah Kim Minseok! Why not eat some more?” his mom scolded him, her lips pursed and brows furrowed disappointedly. “It’s your first day. You need to eat a decent breakfast, you know!” she added with a huff.

As much as he wanted to - breakfast _is_ the most important meal of the day and his mom had even made his favourite this morning - but time was against him at the moment. Now he really does regret staying up late last night. Biting back a groan, Minseok shook his head and tapped his watch. “Can’t mom,” he replied distractedly. “It's almost time. I can’t be late today!”

Before she could scold him once more, Minseok hastily put on his shoes and dashed out of the door. He then started to run down the streets like his life depended on it.

Well school is important, right?

But there’s something more important on the first day for Minseok. And it would definitely affect his future. So he couldn’t be late today of all days. Minseok would never, ever allow it.

**

He pushed his limbs to run faster - faster and _faster_ like he always does during a soccer match, willing his legs to go beyond their limit. He dashed through people, skidding through the throngs of the morning rush, expertly avoiding clashing into anyone. It was as if he was avoiding the attackers from getting the ball with the way he was running; Minseok felt like he was playing soccer and the thrill thrummed in his veins.

His heart pounded frantically and enthusiastically inside his chest, a sense of happiness and contentment gradually overwhelming him. _‘I seriously love soccer, don’t I?_’ he mused to himself, the tips of lips tugging upwards. He shook his head at how silly he was.

He really was a soccer-idiot (that’s what his friends fondly call him).

As Minseok neared the school’s gate, he slowed down his fast sprint into an easy jog. He briefly checked his watch and saw he had a couple of minutes to spare until the morning assembly for the freshmen; he breathed a sigh of relief. He stopped just by the entrance gate and considered himself. He wiped away the beads of sweat trickling down his face and fixed his appearance, finally taking the time to make himself presentable. His mom would surely scold him when she sees the state he’s in. She always made it a point for him and his brother to look their best - _especially_ when meeting new people.

“Fighting!” he told himself, trying but failing to calm his jittery heart. He was officially starting middle school after all. It was the start of everything for him.

Before Minseok could even take another step towards the gate, he suddenly heard a shout from behind him. “Watch out!” they frantically screamed. Curious of the commotion, Minseok turned around and was instantly met with a fiery soccer ball. The ball hit him square on the face - and it freaking _hurt_.

He felt a trickle of blood drop from his nose and his vision started to blur. From the lack of sleep, fatigue from his early morning run, as well as his empty stomach, Minseok groaned.

_‘Of all days,’_ he mentally groused.

He then suddenly found himself on the ground, his gaze meeting the clear blue sky. _‘It must have been from the impact,’_ he thought wryly.

He was gradually losing his consciousness, his mind starting to adrift into the darkness. He knew he should fight his weariness but Minseok suddenly felt the need to just close his eyes and _sleep_. His eyelids were seriously getting heavier and heavier by the second.

As Minseok eventually caved in to the weariness, he saw a pair of pretty doe eyes staring worriedly down at him. The person was waving his hands all over the place and was seemingly spouting out something he couldn’t comprehend. People had started to gather around him but the person with doe eyes was still restless above him.

Minseok chuckled lightly despite his injury. '_He worries too much,’_ he thought before finally succumbing into the abyss.

**

He gradually stirred from his slumber. His body was a little stiff but nothing was out of the ordinary aside from his massive migraine. He could make out a scent of disinfectant but the smell was somehow faint, a little clogged. He reached out and tentatively touched his nose. _‘It’s a bit sore_,’ he thought with a grimace. His mom was going to scold him for being reckless once he gets home. He honestly wasn’t looking forward to that. He couldn’t help but wince at the thought.

Heaving a sigh, he finally opened his eyes. A white ceiling greeted his hazy gaze. He blinked a few times, gradually adapting to the bright room. He slowly sat up and scanned his surroundings. Everything was white; the ceiling, the fan, the bed, the curtains - even the slippers were white. Minseok couldn’t help but sigh again. “It’s just the first day and I’m already in the school’s clinic,” he ruefully mumbled, his hand delicately massaging his temple.

“I hope Dongwoo wrote down notes today,” he grumbled as he put on his blazer. He had checked his watch and saw it was already lunchtime. He slept through the assembly and even missed his morning classes. His first day was definitely an unexpected string of events. This wasn’t how he pictured his day would go at all. Minseok somewhat felt cheated.

Sighing again, Minseok grabbed for his bag and thanked the nurse. He then proceeded to his classroom and finally, finally started his middle school days.

**

“Can’t believe you got knocked out by the thing you love the most,” Dongwoo chuckled beside him. He was currently bending to his right, stretching his upper body easily. They were in the middle of the soccer field, under the scorching heat and intense scrutiny of their seniors, stretching their muscles before the real warm up begins.

It was their first day of school and it’s an important day to most people. It was a step closer to their dreams. It’s also the same for Minseok. But instead of the classes like English or History, what’s he’s most interested in was the after school activity - the soccer tryouts.

Ever since he was a little kid, he had always dreamt of being a famous soccer player. He wanted to play in the Olympics and represent his country like his idols did. He wanted to travel and play with the many athletes all around the world. He just honestly wanted to play. So with his own sweat and blood, Minseok worked hard on reaching his goal. Day after day, he trained his body in order to become fit as a soccer player. He even tried taekwondo so he could increase his strength. And he knew, trying out for his middle school soccer team would surely benefit his future.

Minseok rolled his ankle, feeling his muscles flex. His friend continued to babble on. “It’s rare for you to get hit by a soccer ball. Even during matches, you easily avoid getting hit since your reflexes are topnotch,” he said whilst continuing with his stretching. “It’s just shocking you know... first thing in the morning I was told my friend was taken to the clinic because he was hit with a soccer ball. I just couldn’t believe it. I even accidentally screamed ‘blasphemy!’ in class,” he ranted off, shaking his head. Minseok couldn't help but roll his eyes at his words. “And you were hit in the head too! That’s like… white roses turning into blue! The impossible becoming possible!”

Minseok shook his head again, slightly annoyed at his friend’s dramatics. But his lips slightly quirked upwards, a little amused. “You know what they say,” he replied whilst reaching for his toes. “The more you love, the more pain it will cause you.”

Dongwoo simply sniggered.

“Are you sure you’re okay now though?” his friend then asked him just as the coach whistled for them to gather at the center. “I know the nurse gave you some medicine for the pain but you shouldn’t be pushing yourself too hard you know,” he added, his eyes clearly worried. They jogged to the center and listened to the coach. Minseok nodded his head and made a peace sign. “If a measly strike would get me knocked out, I don’t have the right to be in the Olympics,” he said reassuringly with a smile.

He looked unconvinced but had thankfully let the topic drop. There was no way Minseok would admit that the ball had hit him pretty badly. Even with an ice pack on it for most of the day, it still hurt like _hell_.

“By the way,” his friend drawled out whilst the coach was handing out the shirts. Minseok simply stared at him, eyebrow raised. “The person who kicked that ball is also trying out,” Dongwoo continued with a cheeky grin. His eyes widened in surprise. He knew he shouldn’t be _that_ surprised. That person had a killer strike after all. He was just surprised Dongwoo knew the culprit but hadn’t told Minseok about him. He does have the right to know. He got injured for freaking sake because of that person; he hadn’t even received any form of apology - Minseok somewhat felt insulted with the indifference.

_‘Maybe he’s a prick so that’s why he didn’t come and apologize?’_ he thought with a roll of his eyes.

He discreetly jabbed Dongwoo on his side. “Which one is he?” he asked whilst surreptitiously scanning the other players in the field. “That _guy_,” the latter pointed towards someone at their far right. “That guy wearing the red jersey number 07,” he added helpfully.

Minseok squinted a little to try and see the person’s face more clearly. He has a thin frame, maybe somewhat lean. He’s pretty tall if he was also a freshman like them._ ‘His built doesn’t seem fit for a soccer player though. He just looks lanky to me_,’ he observed, lips pursing in thought. His hair’s seem to be long since he had tied it up on a ponytail. When his gaze finally landed on the person’s face, Minseok's eyebrows shot up in great surprise. “Are you freaking _serious_?!” he whispered-yelled to his friend. “That guy looks like he couldn’t hurt a fly!” he commented, disbelief obvious in his voice. The person has a very elegant face, quite feminine features to be quite honest. From his stature, he seemed weak and frail and feeble. He couldn’t believe someone like him - like a flower boy from a manhwa of some sort - could kick a soccer ball as if a devil was possessing him. He just couldn't believe it!

Dongwoo shook his head at his friend’s reaction. “Says the guy who’s a level 2 black belt in taekwondo but looks like a peach fairy,” he refuted, chuckling humorlessly.

Minseok simply had no answer to that so he smartly shut his mouth. He shook his head and decidedly concentrated on the tryouts, forcefully pushing thoughts of that angelic face with a demonic kick at the back of his mind.

**

When the coach finally dismissed them after hours of the gruelling tryout, Minseok felt strangely refreshed. Despite his earlier turmoil over the culprit of his injury, merely playing soccer had erased his annoyance.

“Hey,” a honey-laced voice called out to him. Minseok turned around and saw the guy with the red jersey number 07. He merely raised an eyebrow in question. The other chuckled, a tad shy honestly, and looked at Minseok quite unsure. “Sorry for not approaching you earlier. I really didn’t know how to talk to you after what happened this morning,” he smiled bashfully. Minseok shook his head and returned the smile. “It’s alright,” he said. “And I forgive you for hitting my head with a soccer ball,” he added, clearly teasing.

The other guy laughed, his eyes twinkling with mirth. They stared at each other, broad smiles on their faces. The first bud of their friendship then blossomed.

“I’m Lu Han by the way,” he then introduced himself. “It’s nice to finally meet the guy I hit with a soccer ball with.” Minseok rolled his eyes at the inside joke, a smile was still on his face though. He reached out and shook Lu Han’s offered hand. “Kim Minseok,” he replied. He then cheekily grinned. “And it’s nice to finally meet the devil with a nasty kick.”

The two laughed again and Minseok thought, ‘_my first day wasn’t so bad after all.’_

He stared at Lu Han and knew this person would be a huge part of his life. He just didn’t expect for Lu Han to be his everything.

_//end of flashback//_

“Ah! Luhan-ssi!” Doctor Jung’s voice reeled him back into the present. Minseok gulped as the figure of the person he had desperately _tried_ to forget emerged from his hiding spot and greeted everyone in the room.

He sat, shocked still and undeniably and _freaking_ perturbed. He honestly didn’t expect to meet him ever again. He didn’t expect it at all - _especially_ as his patient.

“This is Lu Han. He’s Beijing’s soccer team captain and a very important participant for the upcoming Olympics,” their director formally introduced the athlete. The elder waved at the people at the table, turning to Luhan. “They will be the team responsible for your therapy,” he stated.

Minseok seriously wanted to run out of the room - _‘maybe even from Korea_’ - and never look back. He desperately wanted to escape but his stupid conscience and stupid responsible side froze him on the spot.

“And Minseok here-” Hearing his name made Minseok snap his head towards his director, his gaze regrettably landing on Luhan. He suppressed a grimace at the latter’s intense gaze. “-will be your head doctor.”

If it weren’t for his stuck up professionalism and not wanting to humiliate himself in front of his _ex_, he’d have banged his head on the table numerous times already. He made do with pinching his thighs.

_‘Of all the athletes in the world, why does it have to be the one athlete he absolutely never wanted to see ever again?!’_

As much as he wanted to protest and ask to be replaced, he knew the Chinese soccer team was here because they believed _their_ hospital was the best for their most precious team captain. And he also knew that their director gave him the case because the elder knew Minseok would rise up to the challenge. He was the _best_ in their hospital after all.

His eyes strayed towards the thick file in front of him. He _was_ honestly looking forward to handling the injury; it was a complicated piece of puzzle he’s thirsty to solve.

He then gazed at Luhan, a grim expression on his face. He just wasn’t looking forward to be with the patient.

He internally sighed, already accepting his doomed fate, and prayed to the gods for strength.


	13. Clashing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ‘Don’t hurt him more than you already have.’
> 
> These words somehow struck a chord in Minseok’s heart.
> 
> Guilty. He felt guilty.
> 
> Of what? He doesn’t know.
> 
> But…
> 
> He was definitely guilty of something.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a while since I last updated this story T_T  
Finally able to hopefully finish this ah!  
See you soonest, alright?

The meeting went _for hours_. Minseok and the other doctors in the team, together with Luhan’s manager and assistants, had discussed different and numerous options for the athlete’s therapy. From surgery to physical exercises and diets, they tackled _every little thing _they needed to. It was exhausting to say the least. Thankfully and surprisingly, the discussion went swimmingly well. It truly did. Everyone was a professional – they had their own pride and ego – yet arguments were astonishingly sparse the entire duration. Of course there were disagreements here and there, but it wasn’t to the point of shouting or cursing like some other cases – or most; it was as if each and every one of them had the same mind, honestly.

The feeling was marvelous! Minseok seriously would have wanted this kind of harmonization in his everyday life.

_‘It’d be more productive,’_ he thought wryly.

And when they _finally_ ended the arduous meeting, Minseok couldn’t hold back the relieved sigh escaping his lips. Neither did the others.

Despite doing so for years, planning a patient’s treatment was honestly one of the most taxing part of their work. They had to work on something _everyone_ would be pleased with without affecting the entire therapy process and effectivity. Everything needed to be perfect to the T.

The pressure would definitely leave a strain on anyone’s nerves.

As everyone started to leave, his gaze unconsciously travelled towards the man he hadn’t seen for over ten years. It was a habit his teenage self always – regrettably – had. This really pissed Minseok off. _‘Even after all these years,’_ he mentally grumbled, berating himself. He was extremely frustrated his body _still_ remembered this uncanny habit.

Sighing softly, he lowered his gaze and observed the athlete’s outfit. His eyes narrowed slightly, the tips of his lips twitching slightly. He was annoyingly holding back a smile, he knew it.

_‘He hadn’t changed much,’_ he silently noted.

The height was taller than before. The built was leaner than before. The way he held himself was definitely better than before too – _more confident,_ he realized. Yet Minseok could still see the old Luhan. _‘Yes, definitely,’_ he internally nodded. He could still see the old him underneath.

Appearance wise, Luhan still preferred those awful large hoodies – the clothing seemingly to swallow him whole. Also, the cap he had on was a clear indication of his heart still bleeding red and yellow. Even after all these years he’s still a die-hard fan.

But to Minseok, the most distinguishing factor that hadn’t changed was the way Luhan’s eyes twinkled, sparkled; it was still full of life – so full of hope and aspiration – that Minseok’s heart couldn’t help but ache at the sense of familiarity as he gazed into them.

His lips pursed.

_‘He hardly changed at all.’_

Minseok doesn’t know if the realization was comforting or the exact opposite.

Their eyes suddenly met. His heart stopped, his entire body rigidly still.

Reeling, Minseok organized his papers and brusquely said goodbye to his colleagues. He then left the meeting room, his pace as if his life depended on it. Maybe it really did. He fastened his steps, praying to each and every god for escape.

Sadly, what the doctor hadn’t counted on was Luhan following_ – more like chasing after –_ him.

The athlete stood up from his seat and followed after him, his steps determined. He didn’t need to chase for long though because Minseok – smart, clever, intelligent Minseok – turned to a dead end.

The doctor inwardly cussed.

_‘Life was seriously playing with him here.’_

Left without a choice, Minseok turned around and gloomily met the athlete’s amused – _the nerve, really!_ – eyes. His expression became gloomier.

“How are you?” Luhan asked, a smile playing on his lips.

_‘The nerve of this guy to ask him _how_ he’s doing!’_

His eye twitched, miffed. He crossed his arms over his chest and jutted his chin up. The doctor _really _didn’t want to answer but curse his professional mode for being courteous. He stared at those inquisitive eyes with a blank expression.

“Fine,” he tersely answered.

The athlete nodded his head, seemingly not bothered with Minseok’s coldness. He cocked his head to the side, smile still present. “What about Jongdae?” he then inquired. “Still the same old trickster that he endearingly was? Or had he finally grown out of those pants?”

Now _that_ got a snort from Minseok. _‘Damn. Self, we talked about this!’_ he inwardly berated himself.

Luhan seemed to be proud of getting a reaction from him with the way he’s beaming. _Freaking beaming!_ He was practically radiating!

It was annoying. _Really _annoying.

Minseok huffed and looked away from those doe eyes he had – _still do if he was completely honest_ – loved. “He’s fine,” he replied with a sigh.

Before the athlete could ask another question, Minseok nodded towards him. “If you’ll excuse me,” he said. “I still need to see other patients,” he furthered, walking past Luhan.

“It’s nice to see you again, Minnie,” the athlete called out before Minseok could turn the corner escaping from the dead-end hallway. The doctor stopped mid-step. He didn’t look back but Luhan took that as a good sign. “Please take care of me,” he added.

Fists tightly grasped together, Minseok hurriedly left. He didn’t spare a glance back at the athlete. Or any goodbyes.

He couldn’t even if he wanted to.

_‘Minnie’_

He called him _‘Minnie_.’

Not Kim Minseok. Not Minseok. Or _even_ doctor.

He actually had the audacity to call him _‘Minnie’_ again.

Oh he was mad.

_Gods damn freaking mad!_

**

That night, Minseok slept fitfully.

**

“When are you coming back?”

He couldn’t help the whine from escaping his lips. His cheeks instantly flushed a fierce red. Minseok wanted to smack his forehead on the table for letting it slip. He _whined_ of all things! He does not – ever – whine. But he – seemingly and stupidly – did. Thankfully the other wasn’t in front of him right now – miles apart sadly – and couldn’t see his tomato face. If he was, Baekhyun wouldn’t let him off for it until kingdom come.

The distance didn’t stop the younger from teasing him though.

“You miss me _that much _hyung?” he asked, his voice filled with mirth and teasing. Minseok rolled his eyes with a huff. Even without seeing him, he just knew the other was wiggling his eyebrows, cheeky box smile in place too. He cleared his throat and distractedly sifted through the files on his desk. “Maybe,” he quietly, honestly, seriously, answered.

The other line was silent. It seemed like the younger didn’t expect Minseok to answer him seriously at all.

“I miss you too,” Baekhyun said softly.

Minseok’s heart fluttered. Warmth instantly filled his chest, spreading throughout his body. A smile gradually slipped onto his lips.

“When are you coming back?” he repeated, softer, gentler, fonder.

The younger sighed. “I don’t know,” he answered, frustration clear in his voice. “Although the treatment’s going well, the client wanted to make sure he’s able to walk freely and completely,” he explained. “We might stay for a couple of days more.”

The smile then turned into a frown. “Are you eating well?” He couldn’t help but worry. How can he not? Baekhyun was like him. Work was their top priority – albeit now it seemed like it’s each other. Well, that’s what Minseok wanted to believe. He knew the younger would give it his all, especially the client they’re currently treating was a VIP – an extremely fussy VIP.

“I am,” Baekhyun answered with a chuckle. He sighed. How taken was he that just the mere sound of his laughter could soothe his worries? Minseok shook his head and smiled fondly. “Take care of yourself, okay?” he told the other. “Work is important but your body is _more_ important,” he stressed.

“You’re such a worrywart, you old man!” the other laughed. “But don’t worry,” he quickly appeased. “I definitely will!”

Minseok was about to make a retort but there was a knock on his door. His brows furrowed. He checked the clock on the wall and saw how early it was. It wasn’t even visiting hours yet.

When he heard another knock, his curiosity grew.

“One moment, Baek,” he said, lowering his phone.

He then walked towards the door and opened.

Surprise colored his face when he saw who it was.

“What are you doing here?”

His relaxed mood was instantly gone. It was replaced with restlessness and apprehension.

He didn’t expect for this person to appear – _at this hour too mind you _– at all.

Standing in front of him, grinning and beaming like how he remembered when they were younger, was Luhan.

_The _Luhan.

_His _Luhan.

“I brought you coffee.”

**

Luhan had been coming to his office every morning. They had already started his treatment so seeing the athlete in the hospital everyday wasn’t odd at all _but_ seeing him in his office so early in the morning? With a cup of perfect, glamorous coffee with Minseok’s name on it too? He would definitely, and terribly, be bothered about it.

He didn’t want to think much to it. He honestly didn’t want to _since_ _he was a professional after all_. But the athlete kept on pestering him, badgering him, and talking to him – _‘for old time’s sake’_ as he had kindly put it.

Minseok wanted to refuse at first but they _were_ old classmates. From middle school until high school, they were classmate. They had spent almost _all_ of their together. The people Minseok knew form back then, Luhan also knew them. They were in the same class, same club, same circle of friends; it was inevitable to be cornered with questions about them. And of course the doctor wasn’t so heartless – or so he believes – to not answer each and every of his inquiry.

Luhan asks. Minseok answers. The back and forth like how they used to.

It was scary how uncannily similar they were acting to their young selves. The familiarity was honestly scaring the shit out of the doctor.

But what can he do?

He _really _did miss Luhan. He’d be a dick not to admit that to himself.

Luhan was his best friend after all.

His sworn brother.

He couldn’t harden his heart to him – regrettably and foolishly so – even if he wanted to.

“You two know each other,” Kyungsoo asked – well, more like stated. Surprised, the doctor stared at his owlish eyes like a deer caught in headlights. He swallowed thickly and awkwardly looked away. “We were classmates,” was all he said.

The nurse simply nodded and then went back to his work.

Minseok knew he wasn’t being judgmental – _or anything_; but why does he feel utterlys guilty?

His heart started to feel unsettled.

**

A week into the treatment, Minseok and Luhan had settled into a routine.

Every day, before his treatment, the athlete would come by Minseok’s office first with coffee. They’d spend an hour or two in each other’s presence. Conversation was sparse though; the doctor’s office always filled with a long silence.

Yet it was comfortable.

_Alarmingly_ comfortable.

Now, Minseok felt _a tad_ overwhelmed.

**

Luhan had just left – on his way to his treatment – when the doctor saw someone familiar standing in the hallway. They were blankly staring at the direction Luhan had just disappeared to. There was a glint of _something_ in his eyes but he could hardly identify it. The doctor was definitely surprised to see him _here_.

“Sehun!” he called to the tall figure. He then walked towards him. “It’s been a while,” he said, greeting the other with his professional smile. The baseball player simply grunted a reply.

His smile dimmed slightly. He knew the younger was a tad distant but he didn’t expect for him to be _this_ stoic.

A little put off, he pursed his lips and tried to think of a topic. Unexpectedly seeing the younger – especially _after_ seeing Luhan off – left a sour taste in his mouth. Unease was coiling around tightly him like a snake. It’s honestly making Minseok stifled.

He then noticed the cast on his arm – his _throwing_ arm, he faintly remembered – and gasped. “You’re injured,” he stated – rather dumbly.

Sehun _finally_ graced him with his gaze. Meeting his gaze – which was filled with such fierce intensity – Minseok felt a little stiffed.

“Are you cheating on hyung?” he forwardly asked.

The doctor’s eyes widened.

“What?” he exclaimed in disbelief. He shook his head and firmly said: “No!”

Minseok felt like he was _lying_.

The younger was just looking at him, gazing at him like some specimen under a microscope. It was jarring – his stare. There was a voice inside Minseok’s head telling him, yelling at him that he was uttering bullshit, that Sehun _knows_. He _definitely_ knows.

“He’s my patient,” he told him. “We’re merely meeting before his treatment.”

His explanation sounded _godsdamn_ _defensive_. He couldn’t help but grimace.

“He was my classmate,” Minseok eventually said, shrinking a little at the younger’s continued quiet gaze. “We were just meeting for old time’s sake…”

“You’re important to Baekhyun hyung,” Sehun told him, finally opening his mouth. His gaze was steady and firm, as well as his tone. His seriousness surprised Minseok. Well, more like shocked him to the bones. The younger then looked back to the end of the hallway – the same direction where Luhan had disappeared to, his jaw tense and tight. His gaze made its way back to Minseok. It was horridly burning to be quite honest. “Don’t hurt him more than you already have.”

With that said, the baseball player then turned around and walked away from him.

Minseok was left in the hallway, Sehun’s words ringing incessantly in his ears.

_‘Don’t hurt him more than you already have.’_

These words somehow struck a chord in Minseok’s heart.

Guilty. He felt guilty.

Of what? He doesn’t know.

But…

He was definitely guilty of _something_.

**

“Luhan hyung?” His brother screeched. “He’s back?!”

Minseok stared at the younger, exasperated. He massaged his temples, trying to soothe his throbbing headache, and tiredly nodded his head. “Yeah, he’s back,” he faintly answered with a sigh. “And he’s my patient.”

Jongdae then cocked his head to the side, jutting his lips into a slight pout. “How do you feel about all this?” he carefully asked.

He suppressed a groan. His brother has turned on his psychiatrist mode. Minseok hated it whenever the other was like this. Jongdae was good at his work – _too good­ to be honest. _With him on his professional mode, Minseok felt like he couldn’t hide _anything_ from him. He’d rather for him to simply keep his questions at bay – a good way to say for Jongdae to just fucking shut up – than for them to discuss about his _feelings_.

He shivered at the thought of having a heart-to-heart with his brother.

But with a glance at his brother, it seemed like Jongdae had made up his mind of having _this talk_ with him because he was looking at the elder with those piercing and calculative eyes of his. He was _freaking_ _determined_.

This time Minseok didn’t suppress the groan that escaped from his lips.

“I-I don’t know.” He eventually answered his brother’s question. “We haven’t seen each other for over a decade and-“ He breathed in deeply. “-and now we’re seeing each other practically _every fucking day_,” he groused. “Seeing his face, talking to him, being _with him _after all these years _– _it’s all pretty overwhelming.”

“And with the way things were-“ He swallowed thickly. “With the way things were _left hanging_ back then,” he said, his voice slightly cracking at the end. Minseok stared at his brother, tears in his eyes. “I don’t know how to feel about having him back.”

He shook his head and then sifted a hand through his hair. “He’s back. He’s _finally _back and I don’t _fucking know_ what to do about it.”

“Do you want things to go back?” Jongdae asked, his voice soft and gentle. Minseok blinked a few times before slowly nodding his head. “Yes,” he quietly admitted. “He was _my_ best friend, Dae,” he stressed. “He was important to me. He _still_ is.”

His brother slightly frowned. “Then what about Baekhyun?” he asked. “What about Baekhyun _now_?”

Minseok’s brows furrowed together. “What does Baekhyun have to do anything with Luhan?” he retorted, a bit confused. His brother glared at him. “Luhan hyung wasn’t _only_ your best friend hyung,” he told him, a sardonic grin on his lips. “He was _your boyfriend_, wasn’t he hyung?”

His breath hitched. _Yes_, Luhan was his boyfriend. His first boyfriend. His _first love_. His first _everything_. It was a fact Minseok was desperately trying _not_ to remember.

He looked at his brother, terribly distressed. “I-I-I,” he clumsily stuttered, words failing him.

_‘Don’t hurt him more than you already have.’_

Sehun’s words then came back to mind.

He then felt like his heart was being squeezed, crushed so despairingly and miserably.

_‘Luhan is finally back but what about Baekhyun?’_

He honestly didn’t know. He doesn’t have an answer.

He was _scared_ to think of one.

“_Hyung_,” Jongdae softly called out. “I won’t offer any advice,” he slowly told him. “_But_-“ he stressed. “Baekhyun’s my friend. I don’t want him to get hurt anymore,” he breathed. “He’d had enough of getting his heart broken. If you need to _choose_,” he said. “Please choose who’s the one who’d make you happy.” There was a small smile playing on his lips but his eyes were dim. “Baekhyun would understand as long as you’re happy.”

His brother gave his shoulder a firm squeeze. He then left Minseok alone in the dining table, thoughts of the past and the present entwining.


	14. Unravel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Baekhyun was his present.
> 
> Baekhyun is his now.
> 
> He knows that. Perfectly does.
> 
> But why does his heart beat so erratically, so damningly, so loudly, when he’s with Luhan?

Minseok should feel relieved – he really should. They haven’t seen each other for over a week – yet seeing those familiar dark brown eyes gazing at him, smiling _oh so_ brilliantly at him, a stifling sensation would always bubble up from the back of his throat, overwhelming and suffocating him.

It was honestly distressing.

Guilt was gnawing at him. Plaguing him. _Consuming _him.

He didn’t tell Baekhyun about Luhan. He didn’t mention anything about the athlete – him being back or him being his patient – not a single word about him at all.

He _couldn’t _tell him. Not even one bit.

Luhan was someone very dear to him.

First and foremost, the athlete was his best friend – he was the person who knew Minseok the best.

Ask him anything about the doctor and Luhan would surely know the answer. He knew how Minseok liked his coffee – just a table spoon of sugar, no milk or cream. He knew how Minseok liked to sneak inside the theatre because there were hardly any people hanging out there during free periods – he’d sneak in with him so Minseok wouldn’t be lonely. He knew Minseok liked DBSK – he bought an album for Minseok for his birthday. He knew Minseok prefers mocha bread over other breads in the cafeteria – he’d buy one for Minseok because he’s close with the cafeteria aunties. He also knew the telltale signs whenever Minseok was lying – he’d always stare at Minseok with _that look_ whenever he’s caught in a lie.

Every stare, every silence, every tiny bit of detail about him – Luhan would definitely understand. He’s like a walking encyclopedia of everything and anything related to Minseok. It’s like he’s an open book to the other, transparent and clear like glass.

A bit concerning but that’s seriously the truth.

Secondly – and maybe the most important, Luhan was his _first love_.

The phrase ‘first love never dies’ is a hard pill to swallow because it rings true to almost every situation. And it’s the same for Minseok.

It had been years since their senior year in high school, years since Luhan left, but Minseok hardly ever talks about it – about him. He rarely reminisces. Even when he meets up with Dongwoo, someone he was close to since childhood, the doctor barely scratches the surface of anything related to his high school days.

He fell in love with Luhan slowly; his feelings gradually growing and budding from friendship towards love, unfolding and developing further and further with each passing day they have together. Bit by bit, little by little, day by day, his heart would grow warmer and warmer, fonder and fonder. When Minseok finally noticed his affections, it was already too late. His love for his best friend had already grown to a point it was beyond any denials and was deeply rooted in his heart, too stubborn and stalwart in its attachment.

Luckily enough, Luhan also returned his feelings.

“You guys are a match-made in heaven!” their friends would always tease them. Everyone practically praised them for being perfect for each other, their relationship heaven’s blessing in itself.

Both love soccer. (Both are good at it too.) Both love coffee. (Both prefer it strong and bitter too.) Both are good at studying. (Both are top students too.) They’re basically two peas in a pod. Similar tastes and similar personalities, everyone really thought they’d end up together for a long, long, _long_ time. Minseok did too.

But senior year happened and everything came crashing down.

Minseok took a fall for Luhan during one of their practice games and got injured. His tibia broke (broke would be downplaying things. His tibia was practically smashed to smithereens) and he was benched for the rest of the season.

He was lucky enough to still be able to walk yet regrettably, he had to say goodbye to soccer. His leg couldn’t and wouldn’t let him play any longer even if he wanted to. If he’d push himself (he would have if his mother didn’t profusely beg him not to), he might end up being on a wheelchair for the rest of his life – or worse, have his leg amputated instead.

It was truly a devastating time for Minseok. His dream of being a professional soccer player was stripped off of him just like that; with a snap of the fingers, he’s in crutches and limping and bitter. _Extremely _bitter.

His grades reasonably fell. He hardly studied like he used to. His earlier drive was for getting into the university of his choice and entering its soccer team yet with his injury, this drive eventually dwindled and became exhausted. His relationship with his parents then became strained as well. He was angry with them. Overwhelmingly angry because they took away his _everything_. They took away his soccer trophies, his soccer ball, his gear, and then his _uniform_. They didn’t want Minseok to think of soccer but the empty spaces on the walls and in his room was blaringly loud, it broke him even more.

He even began losing friends because he kept on lashing out to them.

He was slowly becoming a lost cause. He became a clichéd fallen hero who’s bitter about anything and everything about the world.

And the person he expected – _wanted _– to be there for him just disappeared.

Without any warning, Luhan had dropped out of high school. Without warning, Luhan left South Korea and returned to China. Without warning, Luhan left _him_.

Minseok tried to catch up to him and ask him why he’s leaving (maybe even _beg him_ to stay) but he didn’t see even a single strand of Luhan’s hair at the airport. That was the day Minseok’s rose-coloured world collapsed and completely vanished into the universe.

His best friend, his boyfriend, his first love, his _everything_ left him in crutches, broken and bleeding literally and figuratively.

Luhan was a sore-spot in his heart. He was the cross that Minseok brokenly – and painstakingly – carried for years. Without words and complaints, Minseok held the hurt, the betrayal, _the love_, deep inside his heart. And now that the person he has been waiting for (Minseok’s brave enough to admit it now), his calm and indifferent bravado was subtly crumbling.

He knew Baekhyun already knows about Luhan. That he’s back. That he’s Minseok patient. That they’re spending time together. The younger would definitely know about it. He doesn’t know what to feel about that. Actually, Minseok doesn’t know what and how to feel about things at the moment.

Baekhyun was his present.

Baekhyun _is_ his now.

He knows that. Perfectly does.

But why does his heart beat so erratically, so damningly, so loudly, when he’s with Luhan?

**

“I heard you’re spending time with Luhan hyung lately,” his brother casually brought up. Minseok’s hand stopped, his chopsticks stilled in midair, as he stared at Jongdae like a deer caught in headlights. This wasn’t how he wanted the dinner with brother – a tradition that was long overdue thanks to both of their busy schedules recently – to turn out. He then mentally shook his head. He shouldn’t feel guilty about his meetings with Luhan. He was his _patient_ after all.

Thinking up to that, his chopsticks then continued to move towards his mouth. He slowly took a bite and chewed silently. He took his time deliberating on his reply.

“He wanted to know how everyone’s doing,” Minseok eventually answered, shrugging his shoulders slightly. His brother tilted his head to side. “Really?” he asked, his face obvious with a pondering expression. The elder nodded his head. “Yeah,” he curtly replied. “_Really._”

Jongdae raised an eyebrow. “So he brings you _coffee_ every day just to ask how everyone is doing?” he expounded. There was a certain accusatory lilt to his voice which unnerved Minseok to some extent.

The tips of his lips faintly turned downwards. “There’s nothing to it,” he told his brother, his brows furrowing together. He was getting a touch defensive – he knows that – but having his brother question him, _interrogate him_ like some criminal, was kind of off-putting to say the least.

“Luhan brought me coffee _for old time’s sake_,” he stressed, putting his chopsticks down and giving Jongdae a no-bullshit look. “We’re working together for his treatment,” he stated. “Having a decent relationship with him would make our collaboration easier and less awkward for everyone,” he furthered. “If spending time with him every morning over a cup of coffee would result to that _then_–_ “_ He emphasized. “–I don’t mind having a liter of coffee at all.”

“If that’s _that_, then okay,” Jongdae carefully drawled out. “Maybe he wants to be friends again,” he offhandedly suggested.

Minseok didn’t know how to reply to that so he simply went back on his food. He didn’t bother on _how _Jongdae knew about it. He knew his brother’s networking skills after all.

But if his brother knew about his mornings with Luhan, then Baekhyun must have too.

Now _that_ made Minseok’s stomach lurch.

**

They had a fight. A fucking fight about his favourite shirt – one he had had since high school – which accidentally got ruined by Baekhyun’s mother.

She would occasionally visit Baekhyun’s apartment and spend some time cleaning whilst waiting for the doctor to come home from work. Coincidentally, she saw Minseok’s ratty, old shirt on the laundry room’s floor and assumed it was a rag. Without much thought, she used it as one.

When Baekhyun finally came home and saw the shirt in his mother’s hand – filled with dust and dirt – it was already too late. The shirt was already _beyond_ repair. The faded red had turned greyish and the material seemed to have thinned because of bleach. His mother even cut off its sleeves for a smaller dust cloth.

Minseok wouldn’t be able to wear it at all anymore. It was totally and wholly ruined!

“You should have kept it in a safe place,” Minseok groused as the younger showed him his beloved shirt, tattered into pieces. “You knew how I love this shirt,” he pointed out. “Why didn’t you put it in the closet or in the drawers?” he continued to argue, his lips pursing tightly together. “I know you hated it but it’s _my_ shirt, my _favourite_ one,” he heavily stressed. “I had it since high school!”

Things wouldn’t have escalated if Minseok didn’t say that but the words were out of his mouth before he knew it.

Baekhyun, who initially had an apologetic look, instantly frowned when he heard those words. “Is that what it is?” he asked, his voice oddly low. “Is that what this is all about?” he furthered, his voice becoming frigid and cold. It was a tone Baekhyun ever uses – especially on Minseok – and it made a shiver ran down the elder’s spine. His stomach dropped, anxiety drumming in his veins.

The younger stared at Minseok, eyes ablaze into an accusing glare.

“You’re not mad because my mum ruined the shirt,” Baekhyun stated. “You’re mad because _that shirt_,” he stressed. “Was given by _him_. It was your keepsake – your memento. It was something to remember him by and _now_ it’s ruined.”

Minseok couldn’t deny it. That shirt was definitely given to him by Luhan and he did keep it because he wanted to have something _from_ him but this wasn’t the problem.

This wasn’t where Minseok wanted the argument to go so he denied it instead.

He dumbly, and profusely, denied it.

“That’s not it!” he said, his voice slightly increasing in volume. Minseok knew he was being badly defensive yet he could barely stop himself from being so. He stared at Baekhyun, his gaze almost, _almost_, pleading. “I had this shirt for so many years,” he repeated. “I wore it whenever I go onto the field.” _Explain. Explain. Explain. Baekhyun would understand. Of all people, Baekhyun would definitely understand,_ he adamantly thought. He believed it with all his heart. “I always wore it under my uniform during games,” he added. “It was my lucky shirt.”

Yet Minseok – naïve and silly Minseok – thought wrong. Although Baekhyun understood – he certainly understood Minseok’s words. He was an athlete himself back in the days after all – but what he understood was the words _in-between_ those lines.

The silent things Minseok hadn’t dared to say. He understood them completely.

_“That’s Luhan hyung’s favourite shirt” _– Jongdae had told him.

They were still freshmen, just a fledgling in high school, and it was his first time visiting the other’s home. They were helping out with the laundry when Baekhyun saw a bright red and yellow Manchester United shirt and pointed it out to his friend.

_“That’s Luhan hyung’s favourite shirt,”_ was his answer. _“He gave it to hyung for luck_.”

Baekhyun knew. Baekhyun knew all along yet he ignored that fact.

Funnily enough, this fact was biting him in the ass right now.

A petty fight over a ruined piece of clothing? Who would have thought that a measly shirt would lead to something like this? Like seriously? They’re _actually_ fighting over something so little.

Who would have thought?

_Really?_

Well, obviously Baekhyun didn’t.

He never really did but life had always hated him. He should have seen something like _this_ coming when things were going _too smoothly _in the past couple of months. He really should have seen it coming.

Feeling a touch woeful, he internally sighed. Somehow he didn’t want to say these words but he _knew_ he – him, Byun Baekhyun of all people – should be the one to say it.

He then leveled Minseok with a serious gaze. “Sunbae,” he breathed. “When something’s already ruined,” he started, staring at the sorry state of the cursed shirt. “To the point it’s completely undistinguishable–“ His expression then turned grim. “–there’s no use putting it back together again.”

“This shirt has been with you for _so many years_,” he stressed. “And I understand it’s importance to you.” Baekhyun took a deep breath and exhaled. Somehow he felt pinpricks stabbing his heart. “But now it’s ruined and couldn’t be worn anymore,” he said, shaking his head. “Maybe it’s time to finally store it away – or give it to charity,” he suggested. “But definitely, it’s high time to let it go.”

“Let go, sunbae.”

“_Please let go_.”

Minseok stayed silent but it was all Baekhyun needed to understand.

And the answer honestly broke him.

_I can’t._

**

When Minseok went on duty the next day, he was notified that Baekhyun had asked for a leave. The length of absence was indefinite. The reasons weren’t stated either.

He knew why though.

Byun Baekhyun – precious and lovely Baekhyun – left.

And it was _his_ fault.


	15. Resolution

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Memories upon memories of the younger were in his office. He had surrounded himself with things upon things from Baekhyun but it somehow escaped his mind.
> 
> He didn’t notice any of it.
> 
> He hardly noticed at all.

Minseok passed the day in a blur. He did his morning coffee routine with Luhan. He did his rounds. He did his treatments. He did his check-ups. He did his paperwork. He did everything like nothing was wrong. He did everything like his world wasn’t collapsing right under his feet. He did everything just like he always does – calmly, meticulously, and methodically. He did everything just like that.

The doctor realized then he was good at that. Pretending that things were okay. Pretending that his heart wasn’t in turmoil. Pretending not to notice the odd stares from his colleagues. Pretending that his hands didn’t shook whenever a certain junior was mentioned during their meeting. Pretending that he hadn’t hurt Baekhyun at all. Pretending that he was still there. Just wholeheartedly and damningly pretending – he was really an expert at that, wasn’t he?

So Minseok continued on. He continued on like normal. Unbothered, undeterred, and unbroken.

But deep within, he was wrecked.

**

A tired sigh escaped from his lips. He had just finished the last document on his desk, his wrist already aching from signing. It had taken him almost the whole afternoon to go through the mountain of paperwork that needed his signature. Thankfully, he didn’t need to do rounds much lately and had time to stay in his office. Minseok like the quietness in these four walls – especially now.

A lot has happened in the day that the doctor felt like he had aged greatly. He massaged his temples, trying to sooth the throbbing pain in his head. He opened a drawer on his side and took out an aspirin and swallowed it. He didn’t bother with drinking water. There were no glasses in his office – quite odd actually – and he didn’t want to his _that _mug. He doesn’t deserve to use it.

Baekhyun had gifted that to him last Christmas. It had a gaudy design with letterings saying “I am Daebak” for a good laugh.

It was.

_He_ was.

Daebak, you know.

He _was_.

Not anymore.

His eyes then strayed towards the couch, his gaze landing on a cat neck pillow sitting innocently on the armrest. Somehow he felt like the cat was mocking him, taunting and scorning him. Minseok merely looked away. He didn’t want to dwell on his imagination any longer.

Another gift from _him_.

It was something Baekhyun had given him during their stay in his house. Minseok honestly liked it because it was cute and soft and comfy. But now… it was scarily daunting.

He swept a glance around his office and noticed a number of trinkets Baekhyun had given him throughout the years.

A picture of a sand castle with coral shells as a design for its picture frame (because Minseok said he wanted to go to the beach but was unable to); a glass jar filled with candy (Baekhyun argued it was for the patients coming in Minseok’s office but the elder knew it was mainly for him when he needed the sugar); a desk calendar with inspiring quotes on each day (“it’s for positive vibes, hyung!” he had stressed which Minseok consequently acquiesced), a fountain pen with his name printed on it (“doesn’t it look fancy?” Baekhyun had said, his eyes twinkling as he proudly shoved his gift onto the elder. Minseok merely rolled his eyes at his words), a post-it set with cats on them (the younger had a similar one in his office but with dogs on them instead) – almost _everything_ in his office was given to him by Baekhyun and he hadn’t realized it.

Memories upon memories of the younger were in his office. He had surrounded himself with things upon things from Baekhyun but it somehow escaped his mind.

He didn’t notice any of it.

He _hardly_ noticed at all.

_“You always failed to remember things about me, hyung.”_

Baekhyun’s words then came to mind.

_“You _always_ failed to remember things about me, hyung.”_

> It was the summer before their junior year in high school. The sun was high up in the sky and the heat was sweltering. Thankfully, their soccer camp was nearing its end so Minseok didn’t need to be in the sun too much.
> 
> His teammates were playing at the beach whilst he decided to take a stroll around. Without realizing, he wandered into the part of the beach where people rarely came. Somehow Minseok felt he had found his little sort of paradise.
> 
> He then stumbled upon someone throwing balls – okay, the person wasn’t simply _throwing _balls. It was obvious he was practicing his pitching.
> 
> Minseok, unexpectedly attracted, approached the person painstakingly practicing by himself. Once closer, he opened his mouth. “You’re good,” he couldn’t help but comment. He wasn’t particularly familiar with baseball skills but he could discern that the other’s pitching form was poised and proper.
> 
> The person, wholly immersed in his practice, was surprised by Minseok’s voice. He jumped, clearly startled. He turned around and met Minseok’s curious gaze. The soccer player was met with dark brown eyes, sparkling and twinkling with so much life.
> 
> He felt arrows being shot through his heart.
> 
> “My name is Kim Minseok,” he found himself saying whilst extending a hand towards the (beautiful) stranger. The person stared at him questioningly but still shook his hand. Minseok’s smile widened at the touch. “What’s your name?” he couldn’t help but ask. “I’ve been here for a week already and it’s my first time seeing you.”
> 
> He knew he was blabbering but his mouth just won’t stop. He internally cringed at how… awkward his words were.
> 
> “Oh G-god. I-I’m not…”
> 
> Minseok wanted to desperately slap a hand over his mouth right about now. _‘Someone stop him from making a fool out of himself, please,’_ he internally wailed.
> 
> His stuttering got a laugh from the person in front of him.
> 
> Embarrassed eyes met with amused ones.
> 
> “Byun Baekhyun,” the other told him, a box-like smile spreading across his lips. “And it’s nice to meet you, Minseok-ssi.”

Fierce pain stabbed at his heart. He looked up at the ceiling, trying to stop the tears from falling. He desperately tried to blink them away.

They met during _that time_. They had _met_ back then. They even exchanged numbers – he could faintly remember asking for Baekhyun’s – but what happened? _Why _couldn’t he remember their first meeting?

Minseok then remembered. A wry smile was hanging on his lips.

The summer before their junior year – that was _that summer._ He had realized his feelings for Luhan back then. On their way home from camp, he was sitting beside Luhan and the latter had his head on Minseok’s shoulder, making his heart pound madly inside his chest. He had been too consumed with his realization that he ultimately forgot about the beautiful stranger he had met on the beach. He had, for lack of a better word, completely forgotten about meeting Baekhyun.

His heart constricted painfully.

_“You always failed to remember things about me, hyung.”_

> Minseok had holed himself up inside his room. The lights were turned off and the curtains were tightly shut close. It was totally and completely dark inside – perfectly how he felt his world had turned into after his surgery.
> 
> It went well, actually. His tibia was fixed like brand new. They replaced the broken bone with something akin to a metal structure. It didn’t hurt – mostly because of anesthesia – but Minseok had somehow grown numb of the pain. He couldn’t walk. Well, not entirely. He was given crutches and a _wheelchair_ – a fucking wheelchair like he’s someone disabled. (Oh, right. He was, wasn’t he?) His treatment and rehabilitation would be after done in a few weeks since they still needed to let the stitches heal and his metal bone adjust. He’d be able to walk on his own – he knew he would and that’s gratifyingly relieving – but knowing he wasn’t able to play soccer like he used to? Now _that_ was something he’d never wanted to know. It was a reality he didn’t want to acknowledge or face. Not at all.
> 
> He hated it. He hated it so much that he refused to even _leave_ his room.
> 
> Surrounded by darkness, Minseok oddly felt some comfort. With his leg injured, he won’t be able to play soccer anymore. With his leg injured, his supposed bright future was now bleak. And the most damning of it all? The person he took the fall for, the person he _expected_ to be there for him, was gone. _Fucking gone like the wind!_
> 
> His internal wailing was cut off by fierce light piercing his eyes. He closed his eyes and cursed. “What the hell!” he screamed. He squinted and tried to discern who was the person who barged in – yes, barged in like a truck – inside his room.
> 
> “Oh my God, hyung. Sorry,” he heard the intruder say. “Jongdae’s looking for me and I might have done something he might be mad at so I was trying to find a place to hide and I just somehow entered your room thinking you were not at home because usually you’re not and-“
> 
> “Shut up Byun Baekhyun,” Minseok shushed the _intruder_. “And close the fucking door,” he added, squinting at the bright light coming from the hallway outside.
> 
> The younger obediently did what he was told and silently went inside his room. Even through the dark, Minseok could _see_ Baekhyun squirming. It was obvious he felt bad about barging in in his room. He exasperatingly huffed. _‘Good,’_ he mentally nodded when noticed the younger _trying_ to be at least quiet. _‘He’s an obedient pup indeed.’ _
> 
> Minseok then decided to let him hide in his room.
> 
> **
> 
> After a while, Baekhyun couldn’t keep to himself any longer. Minseok felt the younger coming closer to him, sitting on the edge of his bed, staring at him.
> 
> “Hyung,” he called out. Minseok wanted to ignore him but he had forgotten that Byun Baekhyun could be the most incessant person in the world if he wanted to. “Hyung~” the younger repeated, his voice coming closer towards him. He _still_ adamantly ignored him.
> 
> He then felt a tentative touch on his leg – the injured one. Not expecting it, Minseok was startled. “Yah!” he scoled the younger. “Don’t touch that!” he seethed. “But hyung,” the younger said. He could _hear_ the pout in those words and it irked Minseok how his heart _slightly _softened hearing it. (He won’t admit it – even to himself. _Never_.) “Don’t touch that!” he repeated, his voice harsher. “Or else get out of my room!”
> 
> The hand was quickly retreated, followed by silence. Awkwardness filled the air. Minseok moved his leg away from the other; as if afraid the younger might touch it again.
> 
> “You shouldn’t lock yourself, hyung,” Baekhyun then said, his voice soft and gentle. “You got injured, yes. But you still have a life ahead of you.” Minseok sucked in a cold breath. His words surprised Minseok. Surprised because he hadn’t expected for _Byun Baekhyun_ to comfort him of all people. “Wallowing yourself in the darkness, it isn’t like you,” he continued. “You shouldn’t be here. You don’t belong in the dark, hyung.”
> 
> “What of it,” Minseok couldn’t help but scoff. “I couldn’t play soccer anymore,” he said, a sardonic grin on his face. “What’s the use of being in the light if _I couldn’t fucking play_,” he heavily stressed. “Soccer was _my life_. It was my everything, Baekhyun. My _everything_!” He couldn’t believe he’s pouring his heart out to his younger brother’s best friend but here he is, pouring his heart out and letting it bleed. “With this,” he said, pointing towards his injured leg. “I couldn’t anymore,” he stated, his voice not above a whisper. “I _couldn’t_ anymore.”
> 
> Minseok then felt strong arms wrapping around him, engulfing him, _calming_ him. Oddly, he found himself clinging onto those arms.
> 
> His sobs then broke the stillness. It was like a dam broke as his tears kept on falling.
> 
> Tears upon tears fell.
> 
> Unabashedly
> 
> Unashamedly
> 
> Unrestrainedly.
> 
> They fell and fell and fell.
> 
> It was _fucking_ liberating.
> 
> And Baekhyun just let him. He let Minseok cry his frustrations out. He let Minseok cry out all of his misgivings, his broken heartedness, his fears – he let Minseok cry it all out.
> 
> He should be embarrassed for crying so much but somehow, he didn’t care. He didn’t care the younger was seeing him at his worst, at his lowest. Because somehow he knew Baekhyun wouldn’t judge him. He _definitely_ wouldn’t. Of all people – even with Luhan – Byun Baekhyun was the _only_ person who wouldn’t judge him at all.
> 
> **
> 
> “You don’t need to be a soccer player to have a future, hyung,” the younger whispered to him when his tears had finally subsided. Minseok was still in his arms, securely and safely tucked in his hold. Those words somehow made him cling onto Baekhyun a bit more tightly. “If you still want to be in the industry, why not be a doctor? Or a coach,” he suggested whilst stroking Minseok’s back. “You can be whatever you want to be, hyung,” he said, his voice so soft that he wanted to cry again. “Whatever it is that you decide on, I know – _for sure _– you’d be successful.”
> 
> “You would shine in whatever and wherever you go, hyung. You always do.”
> 
> Baekhyun then released him and stood up. He then left Minseok alone in his room, stunned silly.
> 
> Unconsciously, Minseok lifted a hand to his forehead. He mindlessly caressed it, trying to discern if he imagined it or not. His lips pursed tightly. He stared at the already closed door, still imagining Baekhyun’s silhouette.
> 
> A light touch. Like a feather. He really felt it, did he?
> 
> His mouth twisted into a skeptical grin.
> 
> It was impossible. He was certainly imagining things.
> 
> He definitely was because how can Byun Baekhyun kiss him on the forehead, right?
> 
> Minseok simply shook his head and released a heavy sigh. He turned towards his window and grasped the edge of his curtain. With a swift movement, he opened them and light was brought into the room, lightening up everything around him.
> 
> He breathed in and exhaled slowly. He stared at the window. The sun was up in the sky and it was shining brightly, warmly, unwittingly.
> 
> “A doctor, eh?” he smirked, thinking of Baekhyun’s words earlier. He tilted his head to side, a pondering look on his face. “Doctor Kim Minseok,” he tried out. “It doesn’t sound bad,” he said with a pleased nod. “Not bad at all.”

_“You always failed to remember things about me, hyung.”_

“It’s the truth,” Minseok said, wiping a stray tear on his cheek. “It’s the _fucking _truth,” he spat, growing angry with himself by the second.

“I failed to remember when we first met,” he spat. “I even failed to remember _you _were the reason why I studied to become a doctor.” Angry, fat tears then started rolling down. He couldn’t hold them any longer. “You were right,” he said, frustration excessively exuding out of him. “You were fucking right all along.”

Byun Baekhyun was right. He certainly was because Minseok – stupid and foolish Minseok – always failed to remember things when it came to the younger. He always, _always_ failed to remember. _Even the important things,_ he regrettably failed to remember them.

**

Minseok came home exhausted, drained out of his wits. He was completely spent – physically, mentally, and most especially, emotionally. He honestly felt like he was walking on the road to the Yellow Springs; he was _that_ tired. His day was shit, he thought with a snort. Being exhausted to the brink of death was somehow expected.

_‘I deserve it though,’_ he grimly thought. ‘_I deserve to be miserable._’

He was about to enter his bedroom when his brother’s door opened. The doctor met with Jongdae’s angry gaze and his heart plummeted. ‘_He knows,’ _he thought. Jongdae definitely knew.

His brother definitely knew what he had done. He knew that he had screwed up. He knew that he had hurt his best friend even when Jongdae persistently told him not to. He knew everything.

_He definitely does._

Guilt came back to him like a bitch.

“Is he okay?”

When those words escaped from him, he knew Jongdae would damn him to Hell for all eternity.

“Is he _okay_?” his brother repeated, his tone heavily sarcastic. He grinned at Minseok, his gaze menacing. “Tell me, _hyung_,” he drawled out. “How can someone _who had his heart ripped out of his chest, _be okay?” he asked, an eyebrow raised. “How can someone who had spent so many years _pining_ _after an idiot_– “ Minseok winced at his words. “– be okay after getting his heart broken?” He now had his back on the back, his brother cornering. “Tell me, hyung,” he said with a glare. “How can he be okay?” the younger Kim asked, saying the words slowly and lowly. “_Tell. Me_,” he angrily spat.

Minseok instinctively reached out and clutched onto his brother’s arms. “I was wrong, okay,” he said, his eyes pleading. “I was wrong about _everything_,” he furthered, holding onto him tighter.

He was desperately trying to convey to his brother his feelings. He was silently pleading with him to listen, silently pleading to him to hear him out. He was silently pleading him _for Baekhyun_.

Jongdae simply looked at him blankly. It was then Minseok knew his brother was giving him a chance – just one chance – to explain.

(He would be an idiot not to know this.)

It was time to explain himself, his feelings – _everything._

“I love him, Dae,” he found himself saying instead. “I _love _him,” he expressed strongly, tears unconsciously brimming. “I love Byun Baekhyun and I don’t know if he’d have me back,” he said, choking slightly as a sob escaped from his lips.

He held onto his brother like an anchor. “I love him _so much_,” he repeated. “But I hurt him, Dae,” he said. “I had hurt him repeatedly for so many years,” he continued despite the tears. “I had hurt him when we first met all those years in the beach. I had hurt him when he came to my room to comfort me after my surgery. I had hurt him when he played the piano for me back then. I had hurt him when he asked me to let go and I didn’t want,” he told his brother. “I had hurt him over and over again.”

His heart felt like it was being stabbed with knives, unforgivingly shredding it to pieces.

“I had hurt Baekhyun _oh so much_,” he shared, exceedingly distressed. “I don’t know what to do anymore,” he expressed. “I want to go to him, and apologize, and beg him to have me back–“

“You can’t, hyung,” Jongdae cut him off. “You can’t do this to Baekhyun,” he said, shaking his head at Minseok.

His words hurt him but Minseok knew it was the truth. He couldn’t be so shameless. Not to Baekhyun.

“Should I let him go then?” Minseok asked.

Simply asking this question made his heart ache uncontrollably. He realized too late Baekhyun’s importance in his life and now, when things were too screwed up and broken, it was already too late to _be with him_ at all.

He then felt a firm grip on his shoulder. Minseok stared at his brother. There were still tears rolling down his cheeks but he paid it no mind. Somehow, with the way Jongdae was looking at him, he oddly felt like there was _still_ hope.

He stared at Jongdae, hoping for a silver lining.

“You need to settle _your_ issues first, hyung,” his brother advised. “Settle what you need to settle with your past first,” Jongdae furthered. “_Then_ that’s the time you can think of your future.”

“Show me your resolution, hyung,” Jongdae told him, a reassuring smile now on his face. “_Prove to me_ that you’re finally letting go.” His smiled then widened. “And _maybe_ I’ll tell you about all the things Baekhyun had done for you.”

And with that, Minseok made a decision.

His past should stay in the past.

It was high time to settle _everything_.

It was time to find his closure.

And obviously, it was time to finally have _the_ talk with Luhan.

Minseok stared at his lockscreen. It was a photo of him and Baekhyun with the younger being asleep. He unconsciously smiled, longing filling his heart.

_Yes, it was definitely time._


End file.
